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You Don’t Say!: Nicolas Cage’s face on pillows, bedding, & wallpaper
10.01.2018
10:09 am
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A shirtless Nicolas Cage lying inside of a banana peel. Get it here
 
I’ve seen Cage’s latest cinematic masterpiece of WTF, Mandy at least three times since its release last month. If we have learned anything from Nicolas Cage during his long acting career it is this—never count the man out. Cage has been everything from hero to anti-hero, and even had a short run as a tasty Japanese snack. He’s been a loser, a winner, a punk, a prisoner, a terrifyingly authentic drunk, and most recently a relentless backwoods lumberjack out for revenge.

Of course, a large part of society’s younger members became acquainted with Cage’s incredibly emotive face thanks to a legendary meme of the actor giving us his best crazy face in a scene from the 1988 film Vampire’s Kiss. The Nic Cage “You Don’t Say!” meme is almost as famous as the actor himself and to prove this point, many of the items featured in this Cage-centric post use this image of Nic as well as a variety of others for pillows, bedding and yes, even wallpaper. If you’ve ever wanted to hug a pillow with a photo of a shirtless Nic Cage sitting inside a banana peel (gloriously pictured at the top of this post), then goddammit this is your lucky day.

All of the items in this post can be yours for about twenty bucks or so depending on how deep your love for Nicolas Cage is. I’ve included links below each image in case you just realized how incomplete your life is because you don’t own a fleece blanket with Cage’s mug eerily photoshopped with the Declaration of Independence. Some images might be slightly NSFW.
 

Nicolas Cage mashed up with the Declaration of Independence fleece blanket. Get it here.
 

Nicolas Cage hugging a rainbow. Squeee! Get it here.
 
More Nic Cage merch, after the jump…

READ ON
Posted by Cherrybomb
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10.01.2018
10:09 am
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‘Nicolastick’: Japan turns actor Nicolas Cage into a snack food (because of course they did)
10.05.2017
08:57 am
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The “Nicolastick’ by Japanese snack giant, Umaibo. Actor Nicolas Cage is pictured on the package in character for the film ‘Army of One.’ Only available in Japan. BOO!
 
So here’s a thing you may or may not know about actor Nicolas Cage, he never stops working. This year alone he has been attached to eight movies (a few are currently in post-production) as well as two more set for 2018 release that are also in post-production. In 2016 Cage starred in Army of One—a film about a man who (after being visited by God) goes on a search and destroy mission to get Osama Bin Laden.

The reason I bring up that cinematic catastrophe is that the film is about to make its premiere in Japan where it is amusingly known as “Bin Laden is my Target.”  And purchasing a ticket to one of the showings is the only way that you can score a package of Umaibo’s special “Nicolastick” foodstuff starting on October 13th. Known as the “delicious stick” in Japan, Umaibo makes a huge variety of the flavored corn snacks such as “Beef Tongue,” “Shrimp and Mayonnaise,” and “Salami” that is rumored to contain fragrant notes of delicious Cheeto dust. So what flavor did Mr. Cage’s Nicolastick get? Apparently, dull old plain old corn was good enough for this bizarre bit of publicity. I’m quite sure this strange promotional snack will show up on auction sites like eBay before too long so don’t worry! You still might get a chance to say that you know what a Nicolastick tastes like.

Life goals, I’ve got ‘em. Do you?

More after the jump…

READ ON
Posted by Cherrybomb
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10.05.2017
08:57 am
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David Lee Roth’s insane isolated vocals from ‘Runnin’ With the Devil’ make a really great ringtone


The great David Lee Roth back in the late 1970s.
 
So first off, yeah, I know that David Lee Roth’s isolated vocals from Van Halen’s 1978 juggernaut, “Runnin’ With the Devil” have been making the rounds out on the Internet for a while. But perhaps what you didn’t know is that there is a site that allows you to download them in neat little MP3 files so you could, as I’d strongly suggest, use them as ring tones for your smart phone. So let’s all help make our smart phones great again by ditching those irritating pre-loaded ringtones and replacing them with Diamond Dave’s straight-up mythical war cry from the stoner teen anthem, “Aaahhh Haaa YEAHHH!”

Of course, it’s easy enough for most people to DIY this themselves, but on Soundboard.com you can even text DLR’s vocals to anyone you want in the United States. If DLR isn’t your cup of tea (???), don’t despair as there are over 485,000 other sounds on Soundboard, including famous quotes spoken by Samuel L. “Say WHAT again” Jackson and Christopher Walken. There’s also an entire category called “Nicolas Cage loses his shit” that includes a downloadable MP3 of Cage rage-screaming the word “fuck” for five full seconds. Nice.

In case you’ve never heard Roth’s isolated vocals from “Runnin’ With the Devil,” here’s a video compilation of that audio:
 

David Lee Roth’s isolated vocals from “Runnin’ With the Devil.”

Previously on Dangerous Minds:
Van Halen wanted to crush a Volkswagen Beetle with a tank in 1979… just to piss off Aerosmith
Van Halen cover Bowie and KC & The Sunshine Band (while judging a dance contest!) in the 70s
Thundertrain: The band that was ‘Hot for Teacher’ before Van Halen
The Nightmare Before Halloween: Insane early Van Halen set from 1977
‘They tried to make us look like the Clash!’ Van Halen’s rejected first album cover

Posted by Cherrybomb
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07.28.2017
02:42 pm
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‘The Best of Times’: Bonkers TV pilot starring baby-faced versions of Nicolas Cage & Crispin Glover
06.23.2017
11:00 am
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Crispin Glover and Nicolas Cage react to the news that their failed television series from 1981, ‘The Best of Times’ is still kicking around out there on the Internet.
 
In 1981 both Nicolas Cage (who at the time was going by his real name “Nicholas Coppola”) and a baby-faced Crispin Glover both made their television acting debuts. However, the pilot, The Best of Times, only aired once before getting the boot from ABC.

I don’t want to ruin any of this for you, but if you haven’t seen The Best of Times—which was part musical, part teen drama, and part comedy—then clear your calendar for the next hour because you simply haven’t lived until you’ve seen an eighteen-year-old Nicolas Cage participating in a bizarre car wash sequence while his pals kick out a vanilla version of Dolly Parton’s “9 to 5.” In a pair of overalls with no shirt.

Your life is also a lie if you’ve never experienced the crazy that is Crispin Glover (who was also eighteen) having a spastic meltdown about the latest Talking Heads cassette tape. Adding to the weirdness, most of the actors on the show went by their own names and there’s something very strange about hearing Glover’s real mother Betty yelling at her boy Crispin throughout the episode. But that’s ALL I’m going to say because this totally golden television oddity that really must be seen to be believed.

PS: You’re welcome.
 

An image of Cage with another star of ‘The Best of Times’ actress and future scream queen, Jill Schoelen.
 
Watch it, after the jump…

READ ON
Posted by Cherrybomb
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06.23.2017
11:00 am
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Feeling Cagey? Website plasters Nicolas Cage’s head on Instagram selfies in real time
11.22.2013
02:18 pm
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I hate the word “selfie.” I may hate it even more than the words “moist,” “slacks,” and even “creamy.” But I digress…

So you can imagine my delight when I discovered the Feeling Cagey website. It’s dedicated to sticking Nicolas Cage’s head—in real time, mind you—on Instagram selfies. Anything on Instagram tagged “#selfie” gets Caged. I’m OK with this.
 

 
Below, Nic Cage and The Bad Seeds perform “Stagger Lee.”

 
Via BuzzFeed

Posted by Tara McGinley
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11.22.2013
02:18 pm
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So, you want to sleep with Nicolas Cage, do you?
09.28.2013
11:02 am
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My first thought was, “Surely sleeping with a plank of wood is mightily uncomfortable?” But apparently not, as the enthusiastic reviewers on Amazon tell me that the Nicolas Cage Pillowcase can give you the best sleep of your life.

One customer comments that her friend is so enamored with sharing his bed with Mr. Cage that:

..you can hear through the walls how much he loves it.

Thankfully, the Nicolas Cage Pillowcase is “stain resistant.”

But this is not just some bedtime fancy, as that:

Classic Nic Cage smile seems to light up the room even when the lights are out!

And his eyes apparently follow you around.

But for those who worry that sleeping with Nicolas Cage will keep them up all night, fear not, as one other satisfied customer attests:

...if you are afflicted with the unfortunate illness of insomnia, purchase this item, I promise you won’t regret it.

Fortunately, I doubt I’ll be requiring one, as just the thought of watching one of Mr. Cage’s movies is enough to send me off.

But if you do fancy a night of bliss, cheek-to-cheek with Mr. Cage, then place your order here.
 
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More pillows to plump, after the jump…
 
H/T b3ta
 

READ ON
Posted by Paul Gallagher
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09.28.2013
11:02 am
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SataNic Nicolas Cage sweatshirt
04.19.2013
03:00 pm
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Ridiculous? Yes. Do I want one? Yep!

This SataNic Nicolas Cage women’s sweatshirt is available through Etsy shop killercondoapparel for $27.99 + shipping (not a bad price, actually). There’s also a men’s SataNic, too.

Via Ultraculture on Facebook

Posted by Tara McGinley
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04.19.2013
03:00 pm
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Nicolas Cage does John Cage’s 4′33″
04.17.2012
10:59 am
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image
 
I have nothing to say about this.
 

 

Posted by Tara McGinley
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04.17.2012
10:59 am
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Meet the Man Inside the Nicolas Cage Costume
02.13.2012
02:19 pm
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image
 
The Onion strikes comedy gold with “Meet the Man Inside the Nicolas Cage Costume.”

If SNL could come up with with shit like this even once a week, I might actually to tempted to watch it again after… uh… decades.
 

 
Via Nerdcore

Posted by Tara McGinley
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02.13.2012
02:19 pm
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The most offensive picture in the world?
12.12.2011
12:12 pm
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image
 
Apparently this is the most offensive image in the world. It’s still missing the Comic Sans font, though…
 
(via The Daily What and reddit )

Posted by Tara McGinley
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12.12.2011
12:12 pm
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‘Raising Arizona’ cast graces the cover of a 1998 Serbian eighth grade biology textbook
11.28.2011
12:27 pm
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image
 
This is why the Internet exists. No one seems to know why an image of Nic Cage, Holly Hunter and a baby appears on an eighth-grade Serbian biology textbook. There’s no explanation for this one.
 
(via Neatorama)

Posted by Tara McGinley
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11.28.2011
12:27 pm
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‘Nicolas Cage is a Vampire’: Photo from 1870 for sale on eBay
09.16.2011
01:23 pm
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Apparently Nicolas Cage is some sort of time-traveling vampire. You can buy the photo now on eBay for $1,000,000.00. From the listing:

Original c.1870 carte de visite showing a man who looks exactly like Nick Cage. Personally, I believe it’s him and that he is some sort of walking undead / vampire, et cetera, who quickens / reinvents himself once every 75 years or so. 150 years from now, he might be a politician, the leader of a cult, or a talk show host.

This is not a trick photo, it’s an original photograph of a man who lived in Bristol, TN sometime around the Civil War.

In the Q & A the seller adds:

Q: Nick Cage has aged terribly in the past 10 years, he’s obviously not been drinking his daily amount of blood to stay young.

A: My theory is that he allows himself to age to a certain point, maybe 70, 80 or so, then the actor “Nicolas Cage” will “die”... but in reality, the undead vampire “Nicolas Cage” will have rejuvenated himself and appeared in some other part of the world, young again, and ready to start all over. From time to time somebody might mention to him that he bears a slight resemblance to the young version that dead American actor, whose name they can’t recall, but eventually, those occurrences will stop altogether.

Nicolas Cage is a Vampire / Photo from 1870 / Tennessee

(via BuzzFeed)

Posted by Tara McGinley
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09.16.2011
01:23 pm
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