Really, people? THIS is what you want? Bite-sized “pigs in blankets” pizza crust? Apparently so, because Pizza Hut just confirmed their Hot Dog Bites Pizza will be available in North America starting on June 18 and “while supplies last.” Their already puke-worthy hot dog pizza crust—introduced in the the UK and Canada back in 2013—has been such a success that Pizza Hut now wants to inflict their artery-clogging mess on Americans.

“The large one-topping pizza, featuring 28 premium hot dog bites baked into the crust, is served with a side of French’s mustard for $11.99,” Pizza Hut said in a news release.

Honestly, I have no words (although “uncivilized” easily came to mind). Just look at that heaping dose of gross in all its greasy glory and decide for yourself.

I don’t feel like I’m giving Pizza Hut free advertising, either. Hopefully none of our readers would be stupid enough to put this shit in their bodies… Right?

 
Via Today and Business Insider

 
Stippes Bar, “Home of the Hungarian hot dog,” is something of an institution in Malmö, Sweden, a diverse, formerly industrial city known for its large immigrant population. Their affordable, delicious, spicy garlic sausages (often served to barhoppers in need of ballast) eventually became the joint’s signature dish, but when it opened in the 1970s, the owner had to offer free coffee to taxi drivers, just to get some patrons in the door—authentic Swedish cuisine is not exactly known for its “heat.” Johnny Thunders, however, was an Italian-American New Yorker, and I’m not surprised he made a stop at Stippes for the intense garlic flavors.

While his exploits in Sweden are pretty well documented—a child from a whirlwind romance, a now-infamous “banned performance.” I can’t find any context on the ad. Stippes is a local favorite, but it’s not exactly “famous.” The ad reads “I, too have gone over to Hungary”—maybe Johnny just really liked the dogs?

Below is some footage of Johnny playing Sweden in ‘82. It’s an engaging performance, but the crowd is seated at tables with actual tablecloths, and they don’t seem to know what to do with the spastic performance. Methinks the hot dog crowd was more his wheelhouse.