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King Turd: This absurdist play from 1896 could have been written about President Trump!


Poster design for a re-interpreted version of Alfred Jarry’s ‘Ubu Roi’ from 2013 in which the tale of Donald Trump’s golf course development in Scotland follows the storyline of the play
 
French absurdist playwright Alfred Jarry’s Ubu Roi (“Ubu the King” or “King Turd”), a pre-Surrealist work, is considered an influential classic of French theatre. It originally premiered in 1896. There were three Ubu plays written by Jarry, but only one, Ubu Roi, was ever performed during his short lifetime (Jarry died at the age of 34 of tuberculosis. After he beckoned a friend to come closer, his whispered last word on his deathbed was allegedly “toothpick” or whatever it is that the French call them).

The Ubu trilogy was conceived to employ actors and marionettes in a vicious satire of greed, royalty, religion, stupidity and abuse of power by the wealthy. The two other plays were Ubu Cocu (“Ubu Cuckolded”) and Ubu Enchaîné (“Ubu in Chains”).

The protagonist “Père Ubu” (yes, this is obviously where the band’s name came from) was originally based on the teenage lampooning of a stuffy teacher written by two friends of Jarry’s from school, but Jarry expanded the plays and used the character as a vehicle for his howling critique of bourgeois society’s evils.

People absolutely hated the scandalous Ubu Roi—it was considered lewd, crude, vulgar and low—and its controversial author. At the premiere in Paris, it was booed for a good fifteen minutes after the first word, “Merdre!” (his coining for “shit,” deliberately close to the French merde and translated in English as “Pshit” or “Shittr!”), was spoken. Fist fights broke out in the orchestra pit. Jarry’s supporters yelled “You wouldn’t understand Shakespeare, either!” His detractors rejoined with their variations on the theme of “shit.”

William Butler Yeats was apparently in the audience that night in 1896 and is alleged to have said “What more is possible? After us, the Savage God.”

I can think of something… or rather *someone*...

The play was accused of being politically subversive, the work of an anarchist mindfucker or even that it was a “hoax” designed to hoodwink a gullible middle-class audience with metaphorical shit that some of them, at least, would say tasted good.

Again, this seems so freaking familiar, doesn’t it?

Not that an absurdist agitator like Alfred Jarry cared about any of this. Characters had names like “MacNure,” “Pissweet” and “Pissale.” Confrontationally pissing off the audience was practically the entire point for him. Ubu’s scepter, after all, was a shit-smeared toilet brush.
 

A ship of fools in a sea of shit…

Via Wikipedia:

According to Jane Taylor, “The central character is notorious for his infantile engagement with his world. Ubu inhabits a domain of greedy self-gratification.” Jarry’s metaphor for the modern man, he is an antihero—fat, ugly, vulgar, gluttonous, grandiose, dishonest, stupid, jejune, voracious, cruel, cowardly and evil—who grew out of schoolboy legends about the imaginary life of a hated teacher who had been at one point a slave on a Turkish Galley, at another frozen in ice in Norway and at one more the King of Poland. Ubu Roi follows and explores his political, martial and felonious exploits, offering parodic adaptations of situations and plot-lines from Shakespearean drama, including Macbeth, Hamlet and Richard III: like Macbeth, Ubu—on the urging of his wife—murders the king who helped him and usurps his throne, and is in turn defeated and killed by his son; Jarry also adapts the ghost of the dead king and Fortinbras’s revolt from Hamlet, Buckingham’s refusal of reward for assisting a usurpation from Richard III and The Winter’s Tale‘s bear.

“There is,” wrote Taylor, “a particular kind of pleasure for an audience watching these infantile attacks. Part of the satisfaction arises from the fact that in the burlesque mode which Jarry invents, there is no place for consequence. While Ubu may be relentless in his political aspirations, and brutal in his personal relations, he apparently has no measurable effect upon those who inhabit the farcical world which he creates around himself. He thus acts out our most childish rages and desires, in which we seek to gratify ourselves at all cost.” The derived adjective “ubuesque” is recurrent in French and francophone political debate.

Sound like anyone you watched in a debate last night who made a total ass of himself in front of one of the largest television audiences in history?

All that was missing was the fucking shit-smeared toilet brush if you ask me….
 
More absurdity after the jump…

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Cops offer to test your meth for the Zika virus—free of charge!
09.09.2016
10:24 am

Topics:
Current Events
Drugs

Tags:
Crystal Meth
zika


 
The Bath Township Police Department in Michigan is making meth users with Zika contamination concerns an offer they can’t refuse. With a Facebook post containing a “breaking news” graphic warning of reports that crystal meth could be contaminated with the Zika virus, the police department has offered free testing of the drug in the interest of “public safety.”
 

 
This is similar to a post made by the Salley Valley Police Department in South Carolina in March offering free screening, adding that they make “house calls.”
 

 
Oh you cheeky coppers, everyone knows Zika doesn’t infect DRUGS. This sounds suspiciously like a labor-saving ploy to get meth addicts to come to you with their drugs.

Well played, officers. We almost have to give you credit for this one. Though we’ll have to see if anyone actually takes the bait—Zika is not typically a primary concern for most meth users. Generally speaking, the primary concern of most meth users is WHERE CAN I GET SOME MORE METH.

Via: WSBTV

Posted by Christopher Bickel | Leave a comment
Restaurant launches Pokémon burger (but not to go)
08.24.2016
09:34 am

Topics:
Amusing
Current Events
Food

Tags:
Pokemon
Pokeburgs
burgers

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Get yer laughing tackle round this!
 
Contrary to parental advice it is now possible to play with your food and eat it.

The Down-N-Out restaurant in Sydney Australia launched a range of burgers yesterday based on Pokémon characters.

The limited edition “Pokéburg” comes in three day-glo flavors—Pikachu, Bulbasaur, and Charmander.

Described as being “too adorable to eat” the Pikachu Pokéburg is a sumptuous feast of processed former cow smothered in cheese and relish served in a bun with “tiger chips” for ears.

The Bulbasaur is the healthier option consisting of burger, lettuce, pickle, avocado, broccoli, relish and onion. While the Charmander is a apparently an orange-colored “volcanic” cheeseburger concoction. (That one was gonna be called the “Trumpburg” apparently, but #peopleweresaying that it might put some off their food.)
 
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Hungry gamers(?) queue to chew the face off Pikachu.
 
When the Pikachu, Bulbasaur, and Charmander Pokéburgs went on sale for the first time yesterday, they sold out within one hour of the restaurant opening.

The Pokéburg is limited to one burger per customer. At present it is only available to eat in. So no Pokéburg go.
 
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More after the jump…

Posted by Paul Gallagher | Leave a comment
Photographs of homeless people and their childhood dreams

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Tammy is a star on Height Street in San Francisco. If she can’t bring a smile on your face, then nobody will. Her biggest pain is that her grandmother and her first husband took the kids away from her.

 
No one chooses to be homeless. No one wants to be without a home to call their own. A string of bad luck, a few wrong turns, a few bad choices, and then wham—you’re flat out on your ass. I ended-up that way after the apartment I lived was destroyed by fire. Escaped with my life and little else. No insurance. No income. No nothing. Quickly found there was only so long I could kip on friends’ floors or sofas before there was nowhere left to go. But I was lucky. I got back to where I’d been.

Horia Manolache photographs homeless people in and around San Francisco. He does more than just take their pictures. He creates portraits of each of these homeless men or women as they are today and who they once imagined they would become when they were children.

Horia is an award-winning photographer. His intention in taking these photographs was to make these homeless people’s stories heard. He photographed them in a hotel, garages, building sites and out on the streets. He met “people with guns and people with golden hearts.” He ultimately made a mobile studio, where he could create these unique portraits.

His wife was his helper—cutting hair and beards, applying make-up. Horia spent time getting to know each of his sitters. He listened to their stories, heard about their dreams. Then he sourced the clothes and materials to create a portrait for each person. Imagining them as they once dreamed they would become—a chef, policewoman, clown, parent. Horia plans to make a book of his photographs called The Prince and the Pauper—more details here. In the meantime, here are Horia’s photographs and the stories behind each picture.
 
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Mike was the first to be in this project. He comes from Ohio, he had to run from there because he used to smoke weed and the police caught him so he was arrested. He is now rebuilding his life, he has a place to stay and he started to work, thanks to an organisation from San Francisco.

 
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Honey run away from home because of her violent husband. She had a car in which she slept but it broke and the police took it so she had to sleep in the park. She learned how to play ukulele by herself and she knows how to sing with spoons. She is called Honey because of her sweet voice.

 
More of Horia’s photographs of the homeless and their childhood dreams, after the jump…

Posted by Paul Gallagher | Leave a comment
‘Wunderkammer’: A new exhibition of Clive Barker’s weird and disturbing paintings

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‘Death’s Womb.’
 
A new exhibition of artwork by writer, artist and filmmaker Clive Barker opens at the Copro Gallery in Santa Monica this month.

Entitled Wunderkammer the show brings together Barker’s more recent oil paintings depicting the “unseen world of fantasy co-existing with our own reality.” Wunderkammer means “a place where a collection of curiosities and rarities is exhibited.”

Barker is of course best known for his superlative work as a writer and producer of fantasy-horror fiction and film. His novels include The Hellbound Heart, Weaveworld, Imajica, Abarat and The Scarlet Gospels.  While as producer or director he has made the movies Hellraiser, Nightbreed, Candyman and Lord of Illusion.

Barker divides his day between writing, filmmaking and painting. The painting he usually does in the evening around seven when he dons his “painting clothes” and goes into his studio. His artwork has been exhibited across the world and included in books and magazines.

Wunderkammer opens at the Copro on August 6th-27th. All of the paintings are for sale—details here.
 
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‘Demons of Night and Day.’
 
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‘3 Beasts Devouring Each Other.’
 
More of Clive Barker’s paintings after the jump…

Posted by Paul Gallagher | Leave a comment
Comedian says THE MOST OBVIOUS THING ABOUT TRUMP that no one else has thought of!


 
Australian comedian Jim Jefferies went viral with his impassioned—and hilariously funny—rant about gun control “Guns Are Not Protection” from his 2014 Netflix standup special Bare. The clip’s been viewed millions of times and sadly racks up millions more with every new gun massacre in America.

Well, Jefferies is about to go viral again with this nailed-it-to-the-fucking-wall breakdown of how Donald Trump plans to fight terrorism by profiling Muslims.

The whole thing is fantastic, and you’ll want to watch it all, but the part that I’m talking about specifically starts at the 4:30 mark. After listening to what he says here, how in the world could anyone with even a spoonful of brains think Donald Trump could possibly keep Americans safe from terrorism? Jefferies demolishes that argument. Pulverizes it. Stomps on it. It’s finished. It’s done.

No one who hears this can possibly unhear what he’s saying here. I don’t care how pro-Trump—or stupid—they might be.

No wonder all the ISIL related websites evince such a decidedly pro-Trump slant! Trump’s doing Allah’s work for him, if you know what I mean (and you surely will after watching Jim Jefferies lay it out so cold here!) Jim Jefferies’ newest streaming Netflix standup special Freedumb is now available.

PASS IT ON.
 

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Scotland greets Donald Trump

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Today in Scotland a street campaign was launched warning the public of a highly toxic and dangerous man who is currently visiting the country. The public are advised not to approach this man under any circumstance or listen to any of the shite that spouts out of his mouth. The man is wanted for inciting racial hatred and very bad hair.

In other news, Republican Presidential nominee Donald Trump has arrived in Scotland.
 
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With thanks to Neil McDonald.
 

Posted by Paul Gallagher | Leave a comment
Employees spanked on stage for ‘not working hard enough’
06.20.2016
12:32 pm

Topics:
Current Events

Tags:
Chinese Rural Commercial Bank


 
Here’s a shocking video—captured on a cellphone—of employees of the Chinese Rural Commercial Bank lined up on a stage and spanked by their manager for not “exceeding themselves.” This was all done in front of their colleagues to publicly shame them for poor work performance.

Via Mashable:

The eight employees were each reprimanded by their manager and made to announce to their colleagues why they were underperforming. He then goes behind them and brutally smacks their bottoms with a large ruler.

After one round of spanking, the manager yells at them again before delivering another round of painful blows

.

Naturally, the video is coming under fire and demands for the unnamed worst manager of 2016 to be fired are something fierce. Good, this is outrageous! Imagine such a thing happening at Bank of America?

 
via reddit and Boing Boing

Posted by Tara McGinley | Leave a comment
If you like ‘Heavy Metal Parking Lot’ now there’s ‘Trump Parking Lot’ (no heshers, lots of racists)


 
Michael Galinsky has documented many moments of political tension, from Klan rallies to Occupy Wall Street. Tagging along with a friend who worked for Reuters, Galinsky showed up at the Donald Trump rally in Greensboro, NC on Tuesday. He applied for press credentials as they were driving to the venue, although his plans from the beginning were to shoot something more akin to Jeff Krulik and John Heyn’s “Heavy Metal Parking Lot,” the legendary underground film made in the parking lot of a 1986 Judas Priest concert.

But whereas “Heavy Metal Parking Lot” is bust-a-gut hilarious stuff, Galinsky’s quietly observational footage of the Trump rally will probably just make you sad. He writes:

I had applied too late which was fine, but I still tried to talk my way in because there wasn’t much happening outside. When that didn’t work I sat down in the shade to figure out a plan of action. After about a minute of watching people trickle towards the venue, I heard a man yelling, “White Power!” I grabbed my camera and approached. He was wearing a big cowboy hat and a Willie Nelson shirt with Willie giving us “the finger.” Still, I wasn’t sure if he was being ironic until a minute later when the cops approached. They explained that we as citizens do have “free speech,” but that his incendiary language was dangerous and therefore prohibited. It was kind of a surreal conversation (see the video), and as I listened, it dawned on me that I wasn’t going to be allowed there much longer either. I was right. After they gave him and his friend the heave-ho, I was told I had five minutes to leave. I tried once again to get in with credentials, then I headed for the parking lot.

I often enter these situations with a vague idea of what I plan to shoot but try to remain open to what comes. I ran into a guy selling shirts and talked to him for a bit. They were vulgar, anti-Hilary shirts and people heading into the event loved them. I started to think about the people who sold things at the event and followed this up with another guy selling shirts. A few moments later, I saw a group of people who were representing the Militia Movement. I talked to them for a bit, and then a roving protest showed up. It was a loud mass surrounded by police. Having spent time with the militia guys, I observed the protest from their perspective for a while.

This event was taking place just days after the horrific events in Orlando, and this was largely an LGBTQ-led protest. After having filmed at dozens of protests, I get a little spooked around cops. These guys were generally working with kid gloves, but I still felt a bit unsure about going to shoot with the protesters as they were surrounded by masses of cops. I’m a “non-credentialed” journalist, and as such, I’m more at risk in these situations, so I try to be very cautious. The protesters set up shop across the street, and I made my way across the street to shoot a couple of people being interviewed by a local news channel. I like to shoot media doing interviews because it gives a context to the situation and how that situation is being portrayed.

And now without future explanation, because of course, none is really necessary, witness the pathetic gene pool who support Biff Tannen sorry, er President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho whoops, I mean Donald Trump as they cavort and gather and hoot and holler in “Trump Parking Lot.”

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Man upset that his new passport makes him look like Hitler
06.03.2016
11:25 am

Topics:
Amusing
Current Events

Tags:
Hitler passport


 
This is one of those “I feel terrible for laughing at this” but admittedly… I did have a bit of a chuckle at this poor man’s expense. Stuart Boyd of Salford, Greater Manchester, eagerly awaited his new passport which was ordered on May 22 after booking a trip to the Greek island of Rhodes in July with friends. When Boyd’s passport finally arrived in the mail, he was dismayed to see that his reproduced photo looked a lot like a certain Nazi leader. Boyd was so bothered by the his new Hitler-esque moustache that he contacted the Passport Office.

Crestfallen Stu said of his unfortunate passport pic resemblance to der Fuhrer:

“To be fair the woman was very pleasant and helpful. She said they obviously didn’t intentionally make me look like Adolf Hitler and told me to send it back so they can issue a new one.”

A spokesperson for Her Majesty’s Passport Office said: “All UK passports are carefully created and checked to exacting standards before they are issued. We will be contacting him to investigate this case further.”

Well, at least his passport photo didn’t make him look like Donald Trump…
 

 
via Arbroath

Posted by Tara McGinley | Leave a comment
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