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Prepare yourself for one the saddest diva stories in all of rock ‘n’ roll history
06.20.2016
10:58 am

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I was recently blessed with the greatest piece of pop music gossip I had ever heard, who heard it from a friend of a friend (isn’t that always the source)? My friend heard from his friend’s friend that the folk singer turned pop singer Jewel (remember Jewel?) once played a show at a large college venue wherein staff were informed never to look her in the eye. This is—to my mind—the perfect piece of gossip because it 1.) centers around an obscure celebrity, 2.) is totally unverifiable, and 3.) highlights an unexpected eccentricity that is probably not true, but is nonetheless hilarious to imagine.

Picture it—Jewel—one of the original Lilith Fair performers—with her wholesome sweetness, her acoustic guitar and her trademark yodeling, leaves her hometown in rural Alaska, surviving for a while in extreme poverty—at one point even living in a van—only to become the sort of mega-diva that demands people not look her in the eye. It’s hilarious. And probably not true. The exact same story has been said about so many celebrities, it’s just funnier because Jewel, okay? (If you read this was something demanded by, say, Elton John or Julia Roberts, then it’s not funny at all is it?)

Bound by my love of dumb celebrity gossip, I felt obligated to share what is most certainly a completely fabricated story—I even offered the caveat, of course, that it’s probably not true because I’m a nice person—and this in turn encouraged others to come forward with their favorite celebrity rumors and stories. The best one though, via a friend of a friend (natch) on Facebook was a very thorough, very believable first person account by a former record store employee—and this one… well, I think that I am I’m inclined to believe. Remember The J.Geils Band? “Freeze Frame”? “Love Stinks”? “Musta Got Lost”? “Whammer-Jammer”? Or my personal favorite, “Centerfold”? The lead singer of The J. Geils Band was not J. Geils, it was Peter Wolf—who had a bit of a diva reputation in his day. What follows is an account I can neither confirm nor deny, but it’s a fantastically detailed story—make of it what you will.
 

 

Alright, here’s my Peter Wolf story.

So. Peter is a bit of a townie in Massachusetts and is pretty buddy-buddy with a lot of the local institutions. He‘s the kind of guy that walks into his regular haunts and expects to be noticed and applauded regardless of where he goes (as an aside, there’s a story that he went into Bukowski’s Tavern one time. Ordered six drinks, and on his tab he wrote “Peter Wolf” and signed it without leaving money).

So this being said, when he does something, he expect as much attention as possible on a local level. When he released one of his solo albums, I was working at a big record store in downtown Boston. and we were told that it was going to be huge. The reason being is because he was signed to a label at the time that had a partnership deal with our chain as opposed to Newbury Comics (a better independent store at the time, still better but less music-y and more merch driven). This means we got the deluxe edition of the album, posters, and the “once-in-a-lifetime” opportunity to do an in-store signing and performance with him.

Everyone that worked there was beyond excited (lie). So the main manager contacted his PR person and asked about an in-store. No big deal. right? Well…

Peter asked us to meet the following demands for the in-store:

1-We were to open an hour earlier than normal

2-We needed to play his new record throughout the day because he wanted to come in and “hear his work.”

3-We could only allow people to attend it they purchased the new CD and we gave them a wristband (something that at the time was last demanded by Billy Corgan who wouldn‘t even let the fucking staff members talk to him).

4-He wanted the back room to be catered

I saw the email and told my boss that it was absolutely ludicrous and that “we weren‘t even going to sell a dozen of these things.” He ignored me, and we decided to follow suit.

I was scheduled from open to close that day because I was good at handling in-stores and such, so I opened the location an hour early (6:00 AM in the middle of summer, mind you), strung posters all through the store, wrote up the wrist-bands and put on the record. Please note that he NEVER SAID WHEN HE WAS GOING TO SHOW UP.

Flash-forward to 3:45PM. One of the floor people says that Peter is in the store. And, by “Peter is in the store” he meant “Peter darted into the store and is now circumnavigating the entire store while going on his tip-toes to hear the album.” I rush downstairs to meet him and I am stopped by one of the floor people who was responsible for selling wristbands. I asked him how many we’ve sold (note: the album went on sale at the beginning of the week and we took little note-cards with receipt transaction number information so the people could come back for wristbands) and he said “Well today we sold three copies, and we’ve given away five wristbands total.” I am starting to panic at this point because his record label expected it to be the turnout of the century. So, right now I’m mustering up the courage to tell Peter WolI the truth (that he probably knew already) that his solo career wasn‘t cutting it.

As I am walking over to him one of the weird regulars we have saw him and sprinted in front of me. I froze. I didn’t know what he was going to say to him, but I was terrified regardless. The conversation went as follows:

Dude: HEY MAN! WHAT‘S GOING ON. I LOVE YOUR MUSIC. MAN!

Peter: Hey, thanks! That’s wicked nice of you. Do you like this one? (he says as he points to the ceiling).

Dude: Nah, man. That sounds like that asshole from J. Geils I hope this ain‘t the new Cars record!

The dude thought that Peter Wolf was Ric Ocasek from The Cars (for those that don’t know, The Cars are a Boston band too and Ric and Peter have a bit of a feud [further aside: Peter has gotten into fights with every mainstream Boston lead singer this side of Aerosmith] and the face Peter made was that of a man who just saw an atrocity. Without hesitation. l burst out laughing in the aisle and I tell the guy “Nah, dude, that‘s Mr. Peter Wolf!” To which the guy said “Jeez, I gave him too much credit, huh?” and walked away. Meanwhile. Peter is standing there in pure silence and as I walk up to him to introduce myself, he goes “Why the fuck do I bother, man?” I obviously have no idea what to say, so I throw my hands to my side and tell him there’s food in the back, and he says “Unless it’s my mother’s cookin‘. I think I’m going to the other fuckin’ store.”

It took an hour and a half to convince him to continue with the signing, and after all that was said and done (he signed like 100 posters for the other stores, and 12 people showed up for the actual in-store) he said “Well, I’d like to see the fuckin’ CARS do that shit” and walked out of the store without saying bye to anyone. As soon as he left. the manager looked at the staff and said “Okay, new rule. If any of you play anything Peter Wolf-related in this god-forsaken store, you’re fired.“

 
Oof. Brutal. But if you’re worried about Peter Wolf, don’t be. The guy managed to get his career together, and he’s still a working musician. His latest solo album even got some acclaim in Rolling Stone a few months ago! Congrats Peter, and thanks for the tunes!
 
More after the jump…

Posted by Amber Frost | Leave a comment
Man vapes world’s hottest chilli pepper. It doesn’t end well for him.
06.17.2016
12:34 pm

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Food

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“Don’t try this bullshit at home”—Russell Hawkins

Everyone meet Russell Hawkins. Mr. Hawkins grows Carolina Reaper chili peppers. The Carolina Reaper is currently ranked as the hottest pepper in the world and Hawkins decided—for whatever reason—to vape the shit out of his homegrown pepper stash. Not only does he vape the pepper on video, he proceeds to snort some (why not?) and then rub some in eyes (why not?). Sounds like a plan to me.

As you can imagine, none of this ends well. At the end of the video, you find yourself asking, “How in the hell is this man still alive?” Methinks Hawkins has been vaping the Carolina Reaper a lot longer than he admits to.

The video really gets going around the 3:27 mark. Enjoy!

 
via Geekologie

Posted by Tara McGinley | Leave a comment
Behind the scenes photos with Joliet Jake, Elwood, Carrie Fisher & the cast of ‘The Blues Brothers’
06.17.2016
12:03 pm

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An unused fake mug shot of John Belushi taken during the filming of ‘The Blues Brothers.’
 
I must admit a bit of bias when it comes to this post as its about my very favorite film of all time (and perhaps yours too), what could easily be considered the greatest credit in director John Landis’ long career, 1980’s The Blues Brothers.
 

John Belushi, Dan Aykroyd, and Carrie Fisher looking cozy on the set of ‘The Blues Brothers.’
 
Of particular interest are the images of Dan Aykroyd and a 23-year-old Carrie Fisher looking quite cozy alongside her fictional cold-footed fiancee in the film, charismatic comedian John Belushi. Which of course got me wondering if I had somehow missed out on the news that the two actors had perhaps had a shotgun free, off-screen fling. As it turns out, Fisher was actually briefly engaged to Dan Aykroyd who asked her to marry him after he “saved her life” by performing the Heimlich maneuver when she was choking on what Fisher recalls was a boring old brussel sprout, not a fistfull of Quaaludes. Sadly the engagement didn’t last, and Fisher left Aykroyd for her former paramour Paul Simon whom she would marry in 1983—the same year that Aykroyd married former Miss Virginia of 1976, blonde beauty queen and actress, Donna Dixon.

Of course, the scene where Joliet Jake and Elwood take a scenic 100 mph drive through the Dixie Square Mall (you know, the place that had “everything”) is probably the very first thing that most people think of when it comes to The Blues Brothers. The mall had been left to decline after closing its doors in 1979 and had since become an epicenter for gang violence and vandalism. A good bit of timing for Landis who proposed the idea of letting his movie crew and two actors—wearing dark sunglasses with a full tank of gas and a half a pack of cigarettes—finish it off. Dixie Square got a Hollywood makeover, and Landis let the cameras roll while Belushi and Aykroyd tore it apart again like a pair of wild dogs. However, the scene where the Blues Mobile makes its final journey to the place where they “have that Picasso,” Daley Plaza, proved to be a bit more difficult to pull off. So Landis sent John Belushi off to work his charm on the mayor of Chicago at the time, Jane Byrne.

According to Byrne, she met with a very “sweaty and nervous” John Belushi in her office who offered her a $200,000 donation to Chicago’s orphans if she would allow them to film that scene and others in Chicago. Byrne of course agreed and large group of stunt people, six camera crews; 300 extras (with an additional 100 dressed up as Chicago’s finest); 300 members of the National Guard decked out as soldiers; a four-man SWAT team; seven mounted police officers; three Sherman M3 tanks; five fire engines and two Bell Jet Ranger helicopters were unleashed on Daley Plaza. To the great satisfaction of Mayor Byrne who was not a fan of Chicago’s 48th mayor, Richard J. Daley who no longer dines at Chez Paul because he’s dead. Tons of intriguing images shot during the making of this remarkable rock and roll cinematic triumph follow. Dig it!
 

Former Chicago mayor Jane Byrne and her daughter Kathy wearing Jake and Elwood’s signature hats and sunglasses with Dan Aykroyd and John Belushi.
 

Pope John Paul II paying a visit to the set of ‘The Blues Brothers’ to ‘bless the set.’ Here, John Belushi can be seen kissing the Pope’s ring.
 

John Lee Hooker with Belushi and Aykroyd.
 
More after the jump…

Posted by Cherrybomb | Leave a comment
Make picking up poop great again with these Donald Trump doggie-waste bags
06.17.2016
09:43 am

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Animals
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We already have the “Dump with Donald Trump” toilet paper. So naturally, the next inevitable crap-related Trump product is the the Poop Head Donald Trump Dog Bags. I can’t think of a more fitting tribute to the shitty Republican presidential nominee.

Now whether or not these bags are biodegradable remains unclear. I don’t see any information about that on the website. I hope they are.

Each roll comes with 15 bags featuring Donald Trump’s head with a steaming hot turd on top. The bag rolls are $4.99 each.


 
via Death and Taxes

Posted by Tara McGinley | Leave a comment
‘Satan at Play’ and other vintage movie magic from early 1900s
06.17.2016
08:27 am

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While not exactly dangerous this early film Satán se divierte by Segundo de Chomón is certainly amusing and a work of art. De Chomón was a Spanish filmmaker whose pioneering work in camera tricks and optical illusions was to influence generations of filmmaker. Many of his “tricks” are still used today.

De Chomón is often compared to that other giant of early cinema Georges Méliès—the great French filmmaker whose works included A Trip to the Moon (1902) and The Impossible Voyage (1904). While there was undoubtedly a rivalry between the two men—with Méliès taking the tape for innovation—de Chomón made his mark by developing a mechanical stencil-based film tinting process that was known as Pathécolor. He also diversified his filmmaking talents into documentaries, dramas and special effects for other directors.

Satán se divierte or Satan at Play aka The Red Specter (1907) is a superb example of De Chomón’s work with its camera tricks—some of which would be later revisited in films like Bride of Frankenstein—stage show magic and beautiful color stencilling.
 
Watch ‘The Devil at Play’ plus ‘Haunted House’ and ‘Voyage to the Planet Jupiter,’ after the jump…
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Posted by Paul Gallagher | Leave a comment
Disorientation of the senses: William Burroughs makes a ‘sick’ and ‘disgusting’ movie, 1966
06.16.2016
04:26 pm

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WSB by Charles Burns.
 
William Burroughs’ work has always been controversial. When Naked Lunch was first published it was denounced by critics as “obscene,” “repugnant” and “not unlike wading through the drains of a big city.” The poet and arbiter of highbrow taste, Edith Sitwell decried the book stating she did not want “to spend the rest of my life with my nose nailed to other people’s lavatories.” Its publication led to an infamous obscenity trial where Norman Mailer was called as a witness to defend the book and its writer. Mailer famously declared Burroughs as:

....the only American novelist living today who may conceivably be possessed by genius.

However, Burroughs was generally unfazed by his detractors—after all he wasn’t writing for them.

When Burroughs decided to make a short film The Cut-Ups with B-movie smut-peddler Antony Balch it was perhaps inevitable that their collaboration caused similar outrage.

When The Cut-Ups was first screened at the Cinephone, Oxford Street, London in 1966:

Members of the audience rushed out saying, ‘It’s disgusting,’ to which the staff would reply, ‘It’s got a U certificate, nothing disgusting about it, nothing the censor objected to.’

According to Burroughs biographer Barry Miles the Cinephone’s manager, Mr. Provisor:

...had never had so many people praise a film, or so many hate it.

 
More after the jump…

Posted by Paul Gallagher | Leave a comment
The unhappiest places on earth: Nightmarish playground structures from around the world
06.16.2016
09:59 am

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Stupid or Evil?

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A strange reverse “human centipede” style playground sculpture.
 
Many of the images in this nightmare-fueled post were taken in playgrounds around Russia, and they are about as bleak as a vodka shortage in Moscow in the middle of winter.
 

The “peeing rainbow kids” of Kiev, Ukraine.
 
Some of the other perplexing playground structures that you’ll see, such as a rock climbing “thing” that looks like a giant dick, and the reverse human centipede sculpture (pictured at the top of this post) were photographed in China, Tokyo and some European locations. Each of them has one thing in common: they appear to have been created by people who don’t like children at all. Of course there are plenty of demented looking clowns as well as depressed looking bears (because, Russia), and other odd animal-themed slides and such that are just too inexplicably odd for words. Unless those words consist of the triple-threat known as “WTF.”

If you need me, I’ll be under the bed.
 

Moscow.
 

Tokyo.
 

‘Goblin’ merry-go-round.

More images of strange playground structures that need to be put out of their misery, after the jump…

Posted by Cherrybomb | Leave a comment
Hilarious ‘Japanese’ Donald Trump commercial is all kinds of batshit crazy
06.16.2016
09:34 am

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I’m at loss for words here. You just have to click “play” and watch it to see what I mean. Clearly it’s a parody of a Japanese-style “commercial” having a laugh at the Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump. What’s scary is, I’m 99% certain, if Donald Trump were to have actually made a Japanese campaign commercial, you know it would be something just like this. It’s not too far of a stretch.

Anyway, the “commercial” is by a musician named Mike Diva and it’s batshit. Just like Donald Trump.

 
via Mashable

Posted by Tara McGinley | Leave a comment
When Dali Met Harpo: Read Salvador Dali’s script for the Marx Brothers
06.15.2016
11:01 am

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Salvador Dali loved the Marx Brothers. He loved their madcap, anarchic comedy. In particular Dali loved Harpo Marx—the blonde corkscrew-haired comic mime whose visual comedy—unlike the quick witty repartee of his brother Groucho—was universal and needed no translation. Dali described Harpo as one of America’s three great Surrealists—the other two being Walt Disney and Cecil B. DeMille.

The pair first met at a party in Paris in 1936. Harpo told Dali how much he liked his paintings. Dali told Harpo how much he loved his films—in particular Animal Crackers which he described as “the summit of the evolution of comic cinema.” Dali gushed over Harpo’s performance where he pulled fish and cutlery from his pocket and shot the hats of beautiful women—this was true Surrealism!

Understandably, the two men became friends.

Dali later wrote “an entertaining, if rather implausible account” of his meeting with Harpo for Harper’s Bazaar in 1937:

I met Harpo for the first time in his garden. He was naked, crowned with roses, and in the center of a veritable forest of harps (he was surrounded by at least five hundred harps). He was caressing, like a new Leda, a dazzling white swan, and feeding it a statue of the Venus de Milo made of cheese, which he grated against the strings of the nearest harp. An almost springlike breeze drew a curious murmur from the harp forest. In Harpo’s pupils glows the same spectral light to be observed in Picasso’s.

When Harpo returned to America, Dali sent him a harp wrapped in cellophane with barbed wire for strings and spoons, knives and forks glued all over its frame. In return Harpo sent Dali a photograph of himself playing the harp with bandaged fingers. He invited Dali to Hollywood saying he’d be more than happy to pose for the great artist—if he cared to smear paint all over him. Dali was delighted to take up the offer. In 1937, he arrived in Hollywood with his wife Gala. He visited Harpo and sketched him playing his barbed wire harp with a lobster on his head. Natch.
 
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Dali’s sketch of Harpo playing the harp.
 
Dali brought Harpo a gift—a movie script he wanted the Marx Brothers to make. The script was called Giraffes on Horseback Salads or The Surrealist Woman. It was a series of unconnected scenes typed in blue ribbon over twenty-two pages with various notes written in ink. Dali had already made two infamous films with his friend the director Luis Buñuel—Un Chien Andalou (1929) and L’Age d’Or. Now he wanted to cast Harpo and cinema’s “greatest Surrealist act” the Marx Brothers in a film that just might revolutionize Hollywood—or maybe not...

Read Dali’s script and see his sketches for ‘Giraffes on Horseback Salads,’ after the jump…

Posted by Paul Gallagher | Leave a comment
Vintage ‘underground’ drawings of Lou Reed, Keith Richards, Bowie & more by Peter Pontiac
06.15.2016
09:17 am

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Peter Pontiac’s illustration from Muziek Expres of Lou Reed. The small caption on the bottom right reads ‘Junkies Ain’t funky!’
 
Muziek Expres was an edgy and super popular Dutch music magazine that got its start back in the mid-50s. In addition to the regular kind of music magazine features like interviews with musicians and bands, the coveted fold-out posters and song lyrics, the magazine also showcased early glammy-looking illustrations done by a legendary Dutch illustrator called “Peter Pontiac.”
 

David Bowie.
 
Born Peter J. G. Pollmann in the North Holland province of Beverwijk in 1951, Pollmann changed his name to “Pontiac” sometime in the 1960’s after meeting up with a group of creative type dropouts whose pastimes consisted of the ever popular trifecta of sex, dope, and rock and roll. During his time with these ne’er-do-well nomads, Pontiac (who had no formal training as an artist) was illustrating the covers of illegal songbooks for acts like Lou Reed and the Rollings Stones. Pontiac’s style came from his love of underground comics, especially the works of cartoonist and folk hero, R. Crumb.

Somewhere along the way, Pontiac’s artwork caught the eye of Rolling Stone bringing Pontiac notoriety on his home turf which led to his work being showcased in publications all over Holland, Spain, and the United States. In 1990, Pontiac launched his own comic zine, the Pontiac Review that would have a fourteen-year run. In 2000 Pontiac published what many residents of the Netherlands consider to be one of the greatest graphic novels to come out of their country, Kraut in which Pontiac relays the eerie story of his father, Joop Pollmann, a volunteer war correspondent for the SS during the Second World War who mysteriously disappeared while sailing off the coast of Curaçao. 

In an interviewconducted not long before his death in 2015 from liver disease, Pontiac expressed remores when it came to his heroin days saying that if he could, that he would do things “differently” and referred to himself as a “victim of Lou Reed.” There are a few sources online if you’d like to own some of Pontiacs work, including the hard-to-track-down award-winning book Rhythm. Pontiac’s rock-star-studded illustrations from Muziek Expres follow after the jump. Some are mildly NSFW.
 

Freddie Mercury.
 

Posted by Cherrybomb | Leave a comment
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