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NUDE Donald Trump statue glued to the ground in several cities
08.18.2016
02:09 pm

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Activism
Amusing
Idiocracy
U.S.A.!!!

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Members of the anarchist artists collective INDECLINE have unveiled life-size statues of Donald Trump naked—and with no testicles and a teeny weenie—in New York, San Francisco, Los Angeles, Cleveland and Seattle. “The Emperor Has No Balls” is the name of their multi-city guerilla installation.

What I like best about this is that clearly these wonderful pieces of ostensibly “public” art were made, really, for just one person’s dubious pleasure: Donald Trump’s! That the rest of us might find them amusing seems like a bonus.

Via the Washington Post:

The eyes scowl, the mouth pouts and the veiny, almost reptilian skin looks like it was torn off a human-size frog and dipped in bronzer.

The job of conceptualizing and creating the statues fell to a man who goes by the name “Ginger,” a Las Vegas-based artist. Ginger told The Post that he has a long history of designing monsters for haunted houses and horror movies.

In addition to doing makeup for a Busta Rhymes video, Ginger’s résumé includes another source of great pride for the artist: He’s a regular keynote speaker at haunted house conventions across the country. (We checked and, yeah, they’re a thing.)

“When the guys approached me, it was all because of my monster-making abilities,” he said, referring to INDECLINE members. “Trump is just yet another monster, so it was absolutely in my wheelhouse to be able to create these monstrosities.”

The statues were commissioned in April. The INDECLINE pranksters said they wanted Trump’s effigy to appear to have a “constipated look.” Each statue was glued to the ground using industrial strength epoxy.

Genius!
 

The “saggy old man butt” view from NYC’s Union Square.

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Revolting Teens Lose Their MINDS! The awesome illustrated covers of ‘Punk Magazine’
08.16.2016
01:03 pm

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Amusing
Art
Punk

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The cover of the first issue of ‘Punk Magazine’ featuring an illustration of Lou Reed by John Holmstrom, January, 1976.
 
Many of the excellent illustrated covers of Punk Magazine in this post were done by the zine’s cofounder John Holmstrom—the man behind the cover of the Ramones album Road to Ruin and Rocket to Russia as well as other illustrated oddities since embarking on his long career as an artist.
 

Members of the Sex Pistols and Malcolm Mclaren perusing issue #12 of ‘Punk’ featuring an illustration of Robert Gordon on the cover
 
A dear friend of mine recently gifted me with a copy of Holmstrom’s 2012 book The Very Best of Punk Magazine and I haven’t put the massive thing down in a month. Though Punk only published for a few short years the book itself is a literal goldmine of punk rock artifacts from beautiful reprints of hard-to-find early issues of Punk, photos, essays and even handwritten anecdotes from Lou Reed, journalist Lester Bangs, Debbie Harry, cartoons drawn by R. Crumb and other visual time-capsules too numerous to mention.

While I’m sure that many of our DM readers already own a copy of this heirloom, if you are not one of them I highly recommend picking one up as it is a much a joy to read as it is just to look at. One of my favorite parts of the book were the images of the illustrated covers of Punk the epitome Holmstrom’s cartoony DIY style which some liken to a giant punk rock coloring book. It’s almost criminal that you can find hardcover copies of the book for about $20 bucks out there but you can and it’s well worth the small investment especially if your memories of the 70s are fuzzy thanks to all that bad acid you dropped and whatnot.

Holmstrom recently announced that he is selling some items from his personal collection such as the first issue of Punk
(pictured at the top of this post). More comic-styled images from the covers of Punk follow.
 

The cover of issue #10 of ‘Punk Magazine’ featuring a big-headed version of Blondie.
 
More after the jump…

Posted by Cherrybomb | Leave a comment
Like a demonic Stephen Hawking: Cenobites scene from ‘Hellraiser’ performed by speech synthesizers
08.16.2016
09:45 am

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Amusing
Movies
Science/Tech

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DECtalk was a text-to-voice speech synthesizer popular in the 1980s. This nifty little piece of technology came with a variety of built-in voices which enabled people who had lost the power of speech to communicate. Its best known user is Stephen Hawking who communicated with the voice “Perfect Paul” (DTC 01).

The DECtalk was also famously the voice of the US National Weather Service on radio and supplied the message to many a telephone answer machine.

In 1939 the Voder was the first attempt at synthesizing human speech by breaking down words into acoustic components. It was the “first device that could generate continuous human speech.”

All well and good, but the one that tickles my fancy was the first time a speech synthesizer was successfully used over a phone to order pizza. This happened at the Artificial Intelligence Laboratory, Michigan State University in 1974, when Donald Sherman who suffered from Möbius syndrome—a facial paralysis—made his order using a Votrax voice synthesizer and a mainframe computer.
 

 
Now you may have seen the recent clip of Monty Python’s argument sketch recreated with speech synthesizers by Per Kristian Risvik. Well here’s another little film he’s made using speech synthesizers to recreate a classic scene from Clive Barker’s Hellraiser. It’s a perfect fit and far, far more creepier.

Here’s the dialog as performed:

Lead Cenobite: The box… you opened it, we came.
Kirsty Cotton: It’s just a puzzle box!
Lead Cenobite: Oh no, it is a means to summon us.
Kirsty Cotton: Who are you?
Lead Cenobite: Explorers… in the further regions of experience. Demons to some, angels to others.
Kirsty Cotton: It was a mistake! I didn’t… I didn’t mean to open it! It was a mistake! You can… GO TO HELL!
Female Cenobite: We can’t. Not alone.
Lead Cenobite: You solved the box, we came. Now you must come with us, taste our pleasures.
Kirsty Cotton: Please! Go away and leave me alone!
Lead Cenobite: Oh, no tears please. It’s a waste of good suffering!
Kirsty Cotton: Wait! Wait! Please, please wait!
Lead Cenobite: No time for argument.
Kirsty Cotton: You’ve done this before, right?
Lead Cenobite: Many, many times.
Kirsty Cotton: To… to a man called Frank Cotton?
Female Cenobite: Oh, yes.
Kirsty Cotton: He escaped you!
Lead Cenobite: Nobody escapes us!
Kirsty Cotton: He did! I’ve seen him, I’ve seen him!
Female Cenobite: Impossible.
Kirsty Cotton: He’s alive!
Lead Cenobite: Supposing he had escaped us, what has that to do with you?
Kirsty Cotton: I… I can… I can lead you to him and you… you can take him back instead of me!
Female Cenobite: Perhaps we prefer YOU!
Lead Cenobite: I want to hear him confess, himself. Then maybe… maybe…
Female Cenobite: But if you cheat us…
Lead Cenobite: We’ll tear your soul apart!
Asian Merchant: What is your pleasure, sir?
Lead Cenobite: We have such sights to show you.

Risvik used a DECtalk Express for the central character Kirsty (“Rough Rita modified for higher stress level”). A Dolphin Apollo 2 for the voices of Pinhead and the female Cenobite (“Heavily altered versions of voice 2/3”). And an Intex Talker (Votrax SC-01A) for the Asian Merchant.
 
Listen to eerie sound of the Cenobites via a speech synthesizer, after the jump…

Posted by Paul Gallagher | Leave a comment
Thundertrain: The band that was ‘Hot for Teacher’ before Van Halen
08.15.2016
04:46 pm

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Amusing
Music

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The cover of the 1976 single ‘Hot for Teacher’ by Boston rockers, Thundertrain.
 
Bands like Thundertrain aren’t made—they are born and the group entered the Boston rock scene back in the mid-70s with a sonic boom. Thundertrain’s heavy-blended jams are full of fuzzy glam grooves and a hard rock mean streak like the kind of riffy juice that runs through the veins of Chuck Berry. To this day they are still revered back east and it’s not hard to understand why as Thundertrain did a great job of “making it up” as they went along back in the 70s. But the topic at hand is the band’s “connection” to Van Halen—specifically when it comes to a song you could probably recite the lyrics to in your sleep, “Hot for Teacher.”
 

The cover of Thundertrain’s ‘Teenage Suicide’ album released in 1977.
 
According to an 2003 interview with vocalist Mach Bell (aka Mark Bell), back when Thundertrain was out on the road sometime in the mid-to-late 70s Van Halen apparently requested that the band open for them at a gig at the famed Agora Ballroom in Cleveland. So imagine what Bell thought when 1984 rolled around and he heard a song that instantly became synonymous with Van Halen—the adrenalin-charged “Hot for Teacher.” A song with the exact same title as what most fans consider to be Thundertrain’s biggest hit in their too short career. Despite the fact that Boston was a veritable hot bed when it came to its mid-70s musical exports (bands like Aerosmith, The Modern Lovers and Boston), and even though “Hot for Teacher hit #3 in the UK alternative charts in 1977, Thundertrain never got the break they deserved and the band called it a night in 1980.

More after the jump…

Posted by Cherrybomb | Leave a comment
The king of rolling joints and his smokable artwork
08.15.2016
08:34 am

Topics:
Amusing
Art
Drugs

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Tony Greenland is the king of rolling joints. Not just your standard doobie but a whole array of incredible joint artworks—from comic book superheroes and cartoon characters to dinosaurs, guns and Jesus.

Tony has made a career out of his joint rolling skills. He resides in Oregon where recreational marijuana was legalized in 2015. He spends his time dreaming up and then creating weird and wonderful designs which can be smoked. Check out his other designs at Smokeable Art.
 
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More stunning joint works, after the jump….

Posted by Paul Gallagher | Leave a comment
‘Excess All Areas’: Mötley Crüe Vibrators
08.12.2016
10:23 am

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Amusing
Music
Sex

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Mötley Crüe may be no more but they still have plenty of merchandise to sell.

Next month a range of eight Mötley Crüe Vibrators go on sale. These “eye-catching” (eye-catching? you’re obviously doing it wrong…) “vibes” are said to “capture”:

...the style and sex appeal of the band perfectly and deliver the power and pleasure you’d expect from The World’s Most Notorious Rock Band.

But wait there’s more…

Even those unfamiliar with the band are bound to enjoy them just as much thanks to the high quality, intense power and gorgeous designs.

The “vibes” are available in mini- and midi-size and are emblazoned with the iconic typography and distinctive artwork from some of Mötley Crüe’s classic albums:

Classic Skull 10 Function Bullet Vibrator (Gold)
Classic Skull 7 Function Vibrator (Black)
Dr Feelgood 7 Function Vibrator (Black)
Girls Girls Girls 10 Function Bullet Vibrator (Black)
Girls Girls Girls 7 Function Vibrator (Black)
Shout at the Devil 10 Function Bullet Vibrator (Pink)
Shout at the Devil 7 Function Vibrator (Black)
Too Fast For Love 10 Function Bullet Vibrator (Silver)

It would seem you’re not really successful unless you have a vibrator named after you.
 
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More ‘eye-catching’ Mötley Crüe vibes, after the jump…
 

Posted by Paul Gallagher | Leave a comment
‘The Insult’: The web comic that makes a mockery of making a man out of ‘Mac’
08.10.2016
11:45 am

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Amusing
Art
Pop Culture
Sports

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“The Insult that Made a Man out of ‘Mac’” (or a variation on the theme) was impossible to avoid if you read practically ANY comic book between the 1940s and the 1980s—and maybe beyond. It was an ad for the Charles Atlas “Dynamic-Tension” fitness program—our hero, a weakling named “Mac,” is humiliated in front of his girlfriend by an archetypal sand-kicking bully on the beach. Later, at home, wounded by the affront, Mac subscribes to the Atlas Dynamic-Tension program and quickly becomes a he-man cut like a Greek statue. He returns to the scene of his emasculation to knock the bully down with a single punch and become the “HERO OF THE BEACH!” His girlfriend of course immediately returns to his side, but other women are taking notice of the musclebound Mac, sooooo…
 

 
I am frankly baffled by a contradiction as regards the longevity of that ad. Not that it doesn’t deserve its classic status—disregard for the moment the cringeworthiness of its deference to violent machismo and misogyny and note how well it adheres to the “Hero’s Journey” template, though it first appeared years before Joseph Campbell named and described that literary trope in The Hero with a Thousand Faces. My problem is just that, OK, look, obviously people were buying the program or the ad wouldn’t have run in every comic for decades, but male comics fanatics aren’t exactly reputed for being chiseled physical specimens (obviously there are exceptions but go to a con and tell me how much beefcake you see). If the ad was so successful, wouldn’t the opposite be the case? Wouldn’t the comic shop guy on The Simpsons be an Adonis instead of an obese, embittered, overlooked snob?

I’m tempted to conclude that nobody who bought the book actually followed through with it.

The ad’s eternal appeal has made it fit matter for parody, and indeed, it’s been parodied plenty. Recently, John “Derf” Backderf, the Eisner-winning author of Trashed and My Friend Dahmer (we’ve told you about him before), hipped me to “The Insult,” a webcomic that’s detourned the ad nearly 100 times. Currently, its creator Scott Marshall is posting a new one every day in a lead-up both to his own birthday and to this weekend’s Dartmouth Comics Arts Festival in Nova Scotia. If you have an idea for an “Insult” strip, Marshall maintains an online suggestion box.

Here’s an assortment of strips. Dangerous Minds’ column width makes them a little small to read properly, but a mouse click will spawn an enlargement.
 

 

 
More ‘Insults’ after the jump…

Posted by Ron Kretsch | Leave a comment
Freakishly cute giant isopod pillows
08.10.2016
09:18 am

Topics:
Amusing
Animals

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These may not be pillows exactly, but the photos certainly suggest you can use them as such. Perhaps they’re considered more isopod plushies than pillows? Either way, they’re so darn ugly that they’re actually cute, right?

The stuffed isopods are straight out of Japan (because of course) and come in many different sizes. I found them all on Amazon and linked to the extra large crustacean for $62.58. If you want a smaller size here is the large and medium.


 

 
More after the jump…

Posted by Tara McGinley | Leave a comment
R. Crumb illustrates incest, murder & other sordid situations from the ‘Book of Genesis’ (NSFW)
08.09.2016
12:18 pm

Topics:
Amusing
Art
Heroes

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It was hard to draw God. Should God just be a bright light? Should I use word balloons? Should God be a woman?

—R. Crumb on his 2009 illustrated version of the “Book of Genesis”

According to seminal underground comic book artist and illustrator of gargantuan women Robert Crumb, his unique artistic style was the product of good old LSD. Prior to taking his first trip in 1965 Crumb was newly married to his soon-to-be ex-wife Dana Morgan and unhappily employed as a greeting card illustrator. As drugs were still legal at the time, Crumb decided to drop acid one weekend and by the time the workweek arrived on Monday his entire perspective on pretty much everything (including his art) had changed for the better.
 

R. Crumb on ACID.
 
We have so many illustrated oddities to thank Crumb and his pal LSD for from Zap Comix, Mr. Natural and the weirdos within the pages of Crumb’s long-running Weirdo. And if anyone could possibly make anything related to one of the greatest works of fiction otherwise known as The Bible more interesting it’s Mr. Crumb. Which is exactly what Crumb did back in 2009 when he published his own 200+ page illustrated take on all 50 chapters that make up Genesis, The Book of Genesis Illustrated by R. Crumb. Though not a fan of organized religion himself, Crumb’s take on Genesis was brutally faithful to its ancient predecessor and is full of comic-styled depictions of sex, murder and debauchery that so displeased “God” that he decided to wipe out his creations in a flood.

Much like the disclaimer on the book’s cover Crumb truly left “nothing out” of his adaptation of Genesis—which likely riled up religious types when they saw passages from the first book of the Old Testament detailing incestual situations illustrated by the sex-obsessed cartoonist. But I’m not one of those types so I wholehearted endorse Crumb’s herculean effort. If this R. Crumb artifact if missing from your collection, you can get a copy here.

Images from The Book of Genesis Illustrated by R. Crumb follow and as you might imagine are NSFW.
 

 

 
More after the jump…

Posted by Cherrybomb | Leave a comment
Revenge Porn: That time Linda Lovelace taught Sammy Davis Jr. how to deepthroat… her husband
08.09.2016
08:40 am

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Amusing
Movies
Music
Sex

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Sammy Davis Jr. was a singer, a dancer, an actor, a comic, and an impressionist. He was a superstar. One of the greatest all-round stage and screen entertainers. Davis was also one of the hardest working men in show business. He worked hard he said because he was a short black one-eyed Jew.

When Davis first started out in vaudeville—working with his father and an uncle—he claimed he never came up against any racism. That happened when he joined the army. He was once beaten up for looking at his white female commanding officer while she was giving him orders. Some lowlife bigots beat him up and wrote “coon” in white paint across his forehead, and “I’m a n*gger” across his chest. They beat Davis until he almost passed out. Then they poured turpentine over him.

Davis was both soldier and entertainer. At night he put on shows for his comrades. The day of his beating, Davis didn’t want to do his act—to “go out there and smile at people who despised me,” as he told Playboy interviewer Alex Haley in 1966.

But I made myself do it anyhow. I was fighting myself so hard to stay out there that the fighting made me do maybe one of the best shows I ever did in my life. And I’m glad it did, because I discovered something. I saw some of those faces out there grudgingly take on different expressions. I don’t mean for a minute that everybody suddenly started loving me—I didn’t want that from them anyway—but they respected me. It taught me that the way for me to fight, better than with my fists, was with my talent.

Davis’ need to win respect may later have made him seem somewhat insincere. When Steve Martin appeared on The Tonight Show, Davis fell off the sofa laughing at his material. Martin thought he must be one helluva comic if his routine was this funny. Until he saw Davis fall off the sofa every time any comic told a joke.

But that’s just small brushwork and not the whole painting.

Davis was a hip, cool cat. He helped make Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin look cool. He made playing Vegas cool—something Elvis never quite managed.

He was into sex, drugs and Satanism long before it was the in-thing to do. Davis went his own way—good or bad—others followed in his wake.

Davis even bucked Hollywood when he left the Democratic Party to support Richard Nixon (who invited Davis and wife to be the first black overnight guests in White House history) It’s fair to say he even had an unacknowledged influence on other American Presidents. Obama’s slogan “Yes we can” runs very close to the title of Davis’ biography Yes I Can. While Davis’ belief that blowjobs aren’t really sex was echoed by President Clinton when he said he not have sex in the Whitehouse.
 
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Sammy Davis Jr.: ‘I Gotta Right to Swing!’
 
Sammy Davis Jr. loved getting his dick sucked. It was part of his “code of marital fidelity.” Blowjobs were fine, but full intercourse? That would be cheating on his wife. Or at least that’s what he claimed.

When Davis was married to his third and last wife, the actress and dancer Altovise—the couple had an open relationship. Davis played the field but kept to his “code of marital fidelity”—only having girlfriends blow him. Of course, sometimes it went a bit further—but Sammy always convinced himself he wasn’t really being unfaithful.

After a long night performing on stage, Davis liked to have people over to his house to chill. He liked to have couples over so he could swing. He’d drink booze, snort coke, and pair off with his chosen woman for the night. They would go off into Davis’ private cinema where they’d watch porn together and “get it on.” Altovise meanwhile was supposed to get it on with whichever man was left.

One couple who came to the Davis’ house in the early 1970s was Chuck Traynor and his wife Linda Lovelace.

Traynor was a creep. A manipulative bully who pimped his wife out for sex. Lovelace had made a couple of “loops”—short 8mm porn movies—and had suddenly become (in)famous overnight as the star of Deep Throat.

Deep Throat was Davis’ favorite porn movie. One ex-lover Kathy McKee said Davis watched that film about a hundred times. It seemed kind of inevitable that Sammy Davis Jr. and Linda Lovelace would one day hook-up and become lovers.

According to McKee:

When Linda Lovelace became part of our entourage, the main event for Sammy was watching Linda swallow his cock—just as she’d done for the camera while filming Deep Throat.

 
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In her biography Ordeal, Lovelace described her relationship with Davis and how she once used the singer to get revenge on her violent and abusive husband.

The first night Linda went to Davis’ house Chuck told her:

“If Sammy suggests anything—I mean anything—you just go along with it one-hundred percent.”

Chuck was pimping his wife to get into the showbiz circuit. He wanted young pussy for himself.

That first night Chuck kept edging the conversation to having “a scene”—swinging—but Davis passed. The next night, the couples met again but this time Davis took Lovelace into his private cinema leaving his wife with Chuck. It was the start of a relationship between Davis and Lovelace.

At first they spent their time talking. Davis rapping about his favorite songs, playing old records, and discussing where his career was going. He allegedly never asked Lovelace about her past. Instead, he encouraged her to get into show business, do something in Vegas, and get into mainstream movies.

Davis had “an understanding” with Traynor. Whenever he led Lovelace away for the evening, Chuck would say nothing and wouldn’t come looking for them. This was because Chuck hoped Davis would “fix him up with a lot of far-out chicks.”

While Linda was giving Sammy a blowjob, Chuck was having his “scene” with Altovise. But their scene didn’t last long because Altovise “despised Chuck and wanted her husband to find someone else for her.”

According to Lovelace, Altovise wasn’t into swinging but only did it to keep hold of Sammy.

For a time, the two couples spent every night together—even going on holidays at Davis’ expense.

One night, Altovise was out. Linda was on her knees deep-throating Sammy while he watched a porn movie with Chuck.

“I really dig that,” Davis said to Lovelace. “I’d like to know how you do it. When are you going to teach me? When are you going to show me how you do that?”

Sammy apparently “often talked like that.” Linda never knew if he was joking or not. This particular night Sammy looked over at Linda’s husband Chuck sitting just a few feet away, eyes fixed on the screen.

“Hey, you think Chuck would mind?” said Davis in a low voice.

“Mind? No, that’s the kind of thing he’d go for in a big way. But let me set it up for you,” Lovelace quietly replied.

Linda knew Chuck would mind. It was not the kind of thing he would be into. It was, according to Linda, his greatest fear—the very thing he dreaded most.

More of when Linda taught Sammy to deepthroat, after the jump…

Posted by Paul Gallagher | Leave a comment
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