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Strange juxtapositions: The funny and unsettling photographs of Ambera Wellmann
08.07.2017
02:41 pm
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It all started out as a bit of fun when artist Ambera Wellmannplunked” an egg into a watermelon. The strangely irrational satisfaction Wellmann felt when combining these two foods started her visual investigation into juxtaposing unlikely objects together. The end results have been described as funny, creepy, and even “gross.” Take, for example, the toilet with a wig which looks like Donald Trump. Or, noodles sprouting from a bikini line making us think about pubic hair. Or what about the close-up of seemingly wrinkled hand with a bra sketched which becomes some grand dame by a pool in Miami?

The best artists make the viewer see the world anew. Ambera Wellmann certainly does this. She takes her photographs quickly using whatever objects she has to hand. This usually means food, clothes, and her own body:

“I enjoy manipulating context and composition to defamiliarize these things and illuminate the conventions that structure our understanding of, or attraction to them. I try to make materials behave like something other than themselves.”

Ambera Wellmann is primarily a painter who also works in porcelain and sculpture. Originally from Nova Scotia, Wellmann won the Joseph Plaskett Award for “her virtuosic painting abilities and her confidence in engaging the grotesque and the uncanny” in 2016. The award allowed the artist to travel to Europe where she based herself in Germany.

Since posting that first egg in a watermelon picture in 2015, Wellmann has been producing and posting an impressive array of her improvised photos which you can see on her Instagram account.
 
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See more of Ambera Wellmann’s fab photos, after the jump…
 

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Posted by Paul Gallagher
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08.07.2017
02:41 pm
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Long-ass decorated toenails
08.07.2017
10:37 am
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Photo by Amy Lombard
 
Photographer Amy Lombard‘s series “Nails Pt.2” explores what might be charitably described as excessively exaggerated toenail art. Now obviously these are acrylic nails on the toes and not the real thing. Lombard worked with nail artist Sonya Meesh to create this, er, rather interesting effect. I dig the shrimp cocktail fork image (Is this a clever visual pun on “shrimping”? Methinks that might be the case.) You can follow Amy Lombard on Instagram and Twitter to see more of her work.

After looking at Lombard’s series, I got curious if people actually did do this in real life with their real toes. The short answer will come as no surprise: yes they do! I got lost looking up long toenail art on the Internet. I had so many burning questions: like WHY? Do you have to buy bigger shoes? Do you put holes in your socks? Can you even wear socks? How do you walk without breaking them? How do you drive a car? Do you scratch wood floors? Do you your toenails hang over your bed?

I don’t know if these questions will ever be answered but I do know the answer to one of my questions: Why not?

I’ve added images of folks IRL who sport super-duper long toenails. Those are posted after Lombard’s photographs.


Photo by Amy Lombard
 

Photo by Amy Lombard
 

Photo by Amy Lombard
 
More after the jump…

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Posted by Tara McGinley
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08.07.2017
10:37 am
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Breaking news: EVERYONE can own Glenn Danzig’s house
08.04.2017
05:34 pm
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Well, since everyone is talking about wishing they could buy Glenn Danzig’s now iconic house since yesterday’s popular Dangerous Minds post—good news! We all can!

Well, sorta. The weird folks at Meth Syndicate, one of the top new companies that does the enamel metal pins that are so popular with the kids (along with their friends at Pizzaships) have come up with a way for all people to buy Glenn’s house! Yup, the “Danzig’s House hard enamel pin”!
 
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It’s posted on their Instagram page along with this text:
 
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As some of you reading this know, I used to be in Danzig and I lived in the guest house there for quite a while and it was bat shit crazy! Not because of Glenn, mind you, but because of YOU! YOU PEOPLE are crazy!

A little after I started living there we had to start chaining the driveway gate to keep the nuts out. I’d wake up many mornings to “the spray can girl” who would walk up and down the driveway slowly shaking a spraypaint can (KA-CHUNK, KA-CHUNK, KA-CHUNK) like some kinda tribal death march. Notes, records, dead things, you name it. When people showed up and were calm and friendly, Glenn was always unfailingly nice. I have known him since 1978 and he’s super cool, he was always fair and generous as a bandleader and I think all the kookoo fans that come up with these weird trips about him are both a blessing and a curse. It’s great to have fans but put yourselves in Glenn’s hooves, imagine being bugged by creepy nuts who all have your address, day and night? Just living with it was pretty unnerving. So remember “Do what thou wilt” unless thou art an idiot! Then do the opposite!

Leave your dark idol the hell alone!!
 

Posted by Howie Pyro
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08.04.2017
05:34 pm
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Things that exist: Yves Saint Laurent stiletto roller skates
08.04.2017
11:24 am
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Like sky-high stiletto shoes don’t hurt already enough, amirite ladies? I know, let’s turn ‘em into roller skates! Say what?! Saint Laurent did just that with their Anthony Vaccarello-designed stiletto roller skates that retail for £2,000 ($2,625). Who in their right mind would buy these painful puppies that promise even more pain?

According to Dazed Digital:

The heels previously appeared in campaign images for the brand that were banned by France’s watchdog over allegations that the images were demeaning to women.

I have to agree, the whole roller skate/stiletto mash-up is totally stupid. And look how pricey: $2,625? $2,625 for this? YIKES!


 

 
via Geekologie

Posted by Tara McGinley
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08.04.2017
11:24 am
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Naughty Nuns: Vintage nun porn from the classic tale ‘The Nun’ & more (NSFW or church)
08.04.2017
10:42 am
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Denis Diderot might sound like the name of some superstar French soccer player but it is in fact the name of a famous Enlightenment writer, philosopher, and playwright, who might do you good getting to know.

Diderot (1713-84) had the smarts. Apart from all his fancy writing, Diderot was also co-founder, editor and contributor of Encyclopédie, ou dictionnaire raisonné des sciences, des arts et des métiers (Encyclopaedia, or a Systematic Dictionary of the Sciences, Arts, and Crafts), or the Encyclopedia. His intention was to make information and knowledge available to all—well, at least to all those who could read that is. Diderot and his buddies wanted to break the superstitious rule of religion over their fellow citizens. To this end, he was always asking difficult questions of religious believers, gently poking fun, and writing controversial philosophical tracts on the question of God, belief, design, and all that.

Take, for example, his book The Skeptic’s Walk which featured a deist, a pantheist, and an atheist out on convivial perambulation together where each offered up their thoughts on God, the universe, and so forth. Due to its content, the book was not published in Diderot’s lifetime. It was long believed the only copy of Diderot’s original handwritten text had been confiscated by the police not long after its completion in 1752. Thankfully, it turned out that Diderot had another copy (told you he was smart) which was eventually published in 1830.

Anyway, you’re not here to read about Enlightenment philosophy, you’re here to see naughty nuns, and we’ll get to that shortly, well, unless of course you’ve already scrolled past all of this and are getting an eyeful below. Good luck with that. That’s kinda like people who “Like” things on Facebook but never click the fucking link. But let’s get back to Diderot.

You see, Diderot was also a bit of a scallywag and a wit. He had a propensity for pranking his buddies which on one occasion led to his infamous work of literature, La Religieuse or The Nun.

The Nun all started when Diderot was miffed over the loss of one of his drinking buddies who had moved out of Paris and back to some big fancy country estate in Normandy. To draw him back to Paris, Diderot started writing his pal (Marquis de Croismare) a series of letters purportedly from a nun called Suzanne Simonin. This young lady had been forcibly sent to a nunnery by her greedy and ungrateful family—a common occurrence at the time—where she found herself preyed upon by sadistic lesbian Abbess of Ste-Eutrope.

The Marquis on receiving these missives from such an unfortunate young woman, wrote back offering his help. Diderot continued the ruse until the Marquis demanded to meet with the young lady to get her free from her imprisonment in the convent, at which point Diderot wrote a final letter from another fictional character claiming the young girl was dead. Later, when all was revealed, the Marquis found the whole prank “hilarious,” as he had acted honorably throughout. (I’m guessing that this was expressed with more of a nervous titter than an outright LOL-style guffaw.)

The correspondence started an idea in Diderot’s head to write a book based on his letters and this became La Religieuse. Published twelve years after his death in 1796, The Nun became a scandalous hit. Obviously tame by today’s standards, the book’s notoriety continued right up to the 1960s when filmmaker Jacques Rivette made a movie of The Nun which was banned by French authorities after the Catholic Church ran a letter-writing campaign to have the film stopped. Rivette’s rather dull movie went on to be nominated for a Golden Palm at the Cannes Film Festival.

I’ve never quite got the whole nuns as sex objects thing—maybe the attraction for some is the frisson of deflowering someone who is supposedly betrothed to the Son of God. Or simply a manifestation of “hot for teacher” for lapsed Catholics? Many nuns were forced into convents against their will (like the character in Diderot’s book), and many (even today ) had the sexual attentions of priests and bishops forced upon them against their will. When Aldous Huxley pointed out that the grounds of some convents were littered with the skeletons of dead babies it is as if he is landing the blame solely with the women. This kind of selective blindness never equates male desire and sex with the consequences of pregnancy or disease.

In 1947, Paul-Émile Bécat produced a series of illustrations for Diderot’s The Nun. DM’s featured Bécat’s work before, and he had a highly respected reputation as an artist and for illustrating some of the most infamous and famous books of French literarture—see more here. This small selection mainly features on the nuns Bécat drew for Diderot’s book and some other works.
 
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More sacrilegious nun action, after the jump…

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Posted by Paul Gallagher
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08.04.2017
10:42 am
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Friend or enema: Japan’s latest supercute mascot goes where the sun don’t shine
08.04.2017
10:19 am
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Adorable mascots are an ingrained part of Japanese culture in a way that isn’t true in the U.S. or Britain. According to the 2011 book Fuzz and Fur: Japan’s Costumed Characters, the Japanese term for such entities is kigurumi, which means something like “dressing up as a stuffed toy.” In America, sports teams are the primary sponsor of such characters, although you do see them sometimes advertising a car dealership or a tax return office in the U.S.

Even though he was never affiliated with the San Diego Padres or any other team, the San Diego Chicken remains the defining exemplar of the genre.

In Japan, many companies and products have a signature mascot intended to draw the attention of consumers. Most Japanese mascots are forgettable enough, but every now and then one comes along that is different from the rest. Such is the case with a mascot unveiled by the Ichijiku Pharmaceutical Company earlier this week. The mascot’s named is “Kan-chan” and she (yes, she) made her debut on Twitter with two poses in front of the Tokyo Skytree Building.

What sets Kan-chan apart is Ichijiku Pharmaceutical’s stock in trade, which is the retail enema. And Kan-chan definitely was designed to resemble that product. Indeed, the resemblance is unmistakable when you look at the product and Kan-chan next to each other:
 

 

 
Somewhat ridiculously, Ichijiku Pharmaceutical apparently has insisted that Kan-chan is a penguin, even claiming that the pink nubbin on the top of her head is not an enema cap but is rather a “hair accessory,” whatever that means. But this seems unlikely, if you consider that Kan-chan’s very name is a shout-out to Ichijiku Pharmaceutical’s signature product—the Japanese word for enema is kancho.

More after the jump…

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Posted by Martin Schneider
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08.04.2017
10:19 am
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OMG, there’s a Bob Ross Chia Pet!
08.03.2017
09:59 am
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I’ve never owned a Chia Pet before, but if I was going to, you better bet it would be a Bob Ross one. If you’re going to have a Chia Pet, what better subject than a soft-spoken white man with a permed afro and a long-running show on PBS? Imagine my delight when I discovered this wonderful creation existed! It’s just perfect. I must own one. Now.

Wanna hear a great factoid about Bob Ross? Of course you do. The reason he always spoke so quietly is this: Before becoming a TV painting instructor, Ross held various jobs in the military that required him to be, as he put it himself, “tough” and “mean.” Ross was “the guy who makes you scrub the latrine, the guy who makes you make your bed, the guy who screams at you for being late to work.” Tired of all of that agro, Ross vowed that after he left the military, he would never scream again.

The Bob Ross Chia Pet is available here for $19.99.


 

 
via Geekologie

Posted by Tara McGinley
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08.03.2017
09:59 am
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Like, totally awesome horror movie-themed lights made from old-school VHS tapes
08.01.2017
10:28 am
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A VHS tape LED light
 
Some days the Internet can be very, very generous when it comes to discovering cool stuff that you never knew existed. Such as these insanely cool LED lights that are made from vintage VHS tapes.

The lights are the invention of Hayley Summers who runs the UK-based Etsy shop, NancysJars. As a horror nerd, I’m partial to Summers’ excellent horror film-themed VHS lights which are a scream. Summers will also customize her VHS tape lights to your exacting specifications. Due to a massive influx of orders, the shop has closed down temporarily but will reopen just as soon as Summers can catch up with the demand for her fantastic lights. In the meantime, I’ve posted photos of some of my favorites below and after the jump…
 

 

 

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Posted by Cherrybomb
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08.01.2017
10:28 am
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Calf born on July 28 looks exactly like Gene Simmons of KISS
08.01.2017
09:12 am
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Well, maybe not exactly. I mean, the calf isn’t trying to trademark “devil horns” or anything absurd like that. But you gotta admit the calf, appropriately named Genie, does bear a rather striking resemblance to the bass-playing, tongue-wagging “God of Thunder,” Gene Simmons. 

Born on 28 July at a ranch in Kerrville, Texas, apparently the calf is even sticking out her tongue in honor of Simmons.

The good news is, Genie will not be turned into someone’s dinner, but will serve as a mascot for a steakhouse. Okay, let me take that back, maybe that’s not such good news.


 
via The Sun

Posted by Tara McGinley
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08.01.2017
09:12 am
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David Lee Roth’s insane isolated vocals from ‘Runnin’ With the Devil’ make a really great ringtone
07.28.2017
02:42 pm
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The great David Lee Roth back in the late 1970s.
 
So first off, yeah, I know that David Lee Roth’s isolated vocals from Van Halen’s 1978 juggernaut, “Runnin’ With the Devil” have been making the rounds out on the Internet for a while. But perhaps what you didn’t know is that there is a site that allows you to download them in neat little MP3 files so you could, as I’d strongly suggest, use them as ring tones for your smart phone. So let’s all help make our smart phones great again by ditching those irritating pre-loaded ringtones and replacing them with Diamond Dave’s straight-up mythical war cry from the stoner teen anthem, “Aaahhh Haaa YEAHHH!”

Of course, it’s easy enough for most people to DIY this themselves, but on Soundboard.com you can even text DLR’s vocals to anyone you want in the United States. If DLR isn’t your cup of tea (???), don’t despair as there are over 485,000 other sounds on Soundboard, including famous quotes spoken by Samuel L. “Say WHAT again” Jackson and Christopher Walken. There’s also an entire category called “Nicolas Cage loses his shit” that includes a downloadable MP3 of Cage rage-screaming the word “fuck” for five full seconds. Nice.

In case you’ve never heard Roth’s isolated vocals from “Runnin’ With the Devil,” here’s a video compilation of that audio:
 

David Lee Roth’s isolated vocals from “Runnin’ With the Devil.”

Posted by Cherrybomb
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07.28.2017
02:42 pm
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