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‘Sorry I put it in your butt’: Absurdly inappropriate cake inscriptions
06.23.2013
01:25 pm
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There are some things in life that are best left unsaid. For everything else, there’s cake!

Making the unsayable palatable: a selection of “absurdly inappropriate” cake inscriptions.
 
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Via Happy Place
 

READ ON
Posted by Paul Gallagher
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06.23.2013
01:25 pm
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Iron Maiden TROOPER beer
06.19.2013
11:29 am
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There’s a novelty beer for everything! I’m still waiting for The Edgar Winter Group’s Frankenstein’s Pale Ale. You know it’s coming any day now.

TROOPER is a Premium British Beer inspired by Iron Maiden and handcrafted at Robinsons brewery. Malt flavours and citric notes from a unique blend of Bobec, Goldings and Cascade hops dominate this deep golden ale with a subtle hint of lemon.

The subtly lemony Iron Maiden ale will be available in the USA sometime late this Summer.

Below, a video which explains everything you need to know about TROOPER

 
Via The World’s Best Ever

Posted by Tara McGinley
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06.19.2013
11:29 am
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Penis Pans: Would you put a dick-shaped cake in your mouth?
06.18.2013
09:28 am
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Would you eat a cake shaped like a penis?

If you would, then you may be interested in this site Penis Pans, or (apparently) One Woman’s Struggle to Use Her Penis Pan.

The site is c(h)ockful with penis-shaped recipes (“Wizard Cake,” “Palm Tree Cake,” and “Elephant Cake”), and the opportunity to purchase a fine array of penis pans. It’s all in a bid to sell goods (of course) for “Bachelorette” parties and (no doubt) to get people to put dicks in their mouth.

If that’s your thing (so, to speak) then check it all out here.
 
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Another big thank you to Laughton Sebastian Melmoth!
 

Posted by Paul Gallagher
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06.18.2013
09:28 am
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Just a photo of a ravenous Johnny Cash eating cake
06.14.2013
10:31 am
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Here’s a photo of Johnny Cash hoarding a delicious looking strawberry cake all for himself. I guess he didn’t like sharing desserts. Or forks!

Photo circa 1970s.

Via Retronaut

Posted by Tara McGinley
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06.14.2013
10:31 am
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Militant raw milk activists are the Joseph Stalins of inappropriate comparisons
06.11.2013
12:31 pm
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Vernon Hershberger
Hat-wearing civil rights leader, Rosa Parks Vernon Hershberger
 
I’ve had unpasteurized, or “raw” milk. I didn’t immediately have a Popeye-like surge of health and vitality, but it is kinda yummy, and there might be some health benefits. In a lot of states it’s illegal to sell, which makes sense when you consider the factory-farming conditions under which most milk is produced. While raw milk from small, clean farms is very low-risk, regulating food is one of the greatest public health projects ever undertaken by mankind, so I think engaging with regulators and officials is generally the way to go, especially since it’s just milk, and it’s not like regular, pasteurized milk is poison.

Many raw milk enthusiasts disagree. Vernon Hershberger, pictured above, is a Wisconsin raw milk farmer who recently went to trial for attempting to skirt food safety laws by setting up a foodshare co-op, rather than selling it outright. He was eventually acquitted for the sale, indicating he can continue the co-op, though he could still be sentenced for attempting to hide the milk after a raid—popular opinion is that he could end up with a small fine for that one.

Of course, the Alliance for Raw Milk Internationale, or “ARMi,” rallied his cause during the trial. Some picketed the courthouse, with signs that said, “My milk My body My choice,” because invoking the most famous slogan of reproductive liberation in U.S. history seemed to make sense to them. And why wouldn’t it? Forcing a woman to carry an unwanted pregnancy is exactly like not being able to obtain unpasteurized dairy products!

His followers also compare him to Rosa Parks. I have two theories about this. One, they both look good in a hat—that’s just an objective fact. The other is that they’re historically confused and conflating anti-racist activists—most folks don’t know about the raw milk farmer whose father posted Angela Davis’ bail, but these people might—I mean, they’re really into raw milk.

But they couldn’t possibly be comparing a white dude selling unpasteurized milk, and a black woman protesting legal racial segregation in public transportation and society at large, at the mercy of a hostile and racist legal system.

No, they could not possibly be making that comparison, because that would just be moronic. 

The only thing dumber than that would be comparing raw milk drinkers themselves to the Freedom Riders, one of the most brave, organized, disruptive, and effective groups of civil rights activists in American history.

Goddammit.

But reproductive and civil rights aren’t the only issues raw milkers perceive as shared struggles.

Canadian raw milk producer Michael Schmidt, who actually went on a hunger strike for raw milk, gives us this historical reminder:

“We don’t have a Hitler we can blame. We have a faceless bureaucracy which works with cold-hearted, intellectual tactics to destroy this country right at its core and it starts with the food supply.”

That’s right Michael, you don’t have a Hitler. Or a Pol Pot. Or a Mao. Or a Mobutu Sese Seko. Or a General William Tecumseh Sherman. You have neither genocide, nor fascism, nor war, nor oppression of a populous—you have a potentially overarching food safety law, and a lot of confused, misplaced anger about corporate control over agriculture.

And before you accuse me of trying to stifle your free speech by pointing out that you’re making completely idiotic comparisons, let me just say, by all means, please continue to do so.

Just don’t be shocked when your audience suddenly becomes a Guantanamo Bay of eye-rollers!

Posted by Amber Frost
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06.11.2013
12:31 pm
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Horrible lady at Dunkin’ Donuts: Who wouldn’t want to spit in this woman’s drink?
06.10.2013
03:47 pm
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People are debating whether or not the woman filming and berating this poor Dunkin’ Donuts employee is mentally unstable. I don’t know.

I’ve worked in customer service jobs before. I have encountered this particular breed of asshole before… many, many times.

If this guy wasn’t even responsible for what she perceives as her mistreatment at the hands of the entire Dunkin Donuts organization, you can only imagine how this jackass acted the night before!

In the video she says she’s worried about having her drink spit in. I think that seems like a rational fear to have when one drops the N-word in an eating establishment.
 

 
Via Gawker

Posted by Tara McGinley
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06.10.2013
03:47 pm
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Hot and Fresh Out the Kitchen: The R. Kelly apron
06.10.2013
02:37 pm
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Although I never thought of myself as the kind of person who would wear an apron, I was just discussing last night with my husband how I intended to break down and buy one. My one day search is already over!

This R. Kelly apron can be found on Etsy for $25 + shipping.

Via The World’s Best Ever

Posted by Tara McGinley
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06.10.2013
02:37 pm
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Sushi Ewoks
06.10.2013
11:47 am
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Perhaps a little too cute for Dangerous Minds (I couldn’t help myself) these Star Wars-themed sushi Ewoks look damned delectable!

There’s a step-by-step “how to” at LydMc.

Below, elder Ewoks made from kiwis.


 
Via Nerdcore

Posted by Tara McGinley
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06.10.2013
11:47 am
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The Horror: Restaurant based on Dario Argento’s ‘Suspiria’ opens in Tokyo
06.07.2013
01:49 pm
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You can run from Suspiria... You can hide from Suspiria... and now you can eat there, too?

Huh? That’s right, kids, Dario Argento’s 1977 horror classic Suspiria, well-known for its sumptuous sets, innovative lighting and oh so Technicolor blood, has had its signature “look and feel” appropriated for a trendy new eaterie by the owners of Cambiare, an Italian bar & grill located in Tokyo’s Shinjuku nightclub district.

Most “theme” restaurants are tacky affairs with the sort of mediocre food that attracts tourists and never the locals, who’ll avoid them like the plague. Having said that, I think I’d simply have to eat at a Suspiria-themed restaurant at least once should one ever open in my backyard… if only to check out the lighting and the carpaccio (!)

I suppose Argento’s 1993 film Trauma was not in consideration for a theme restaurant? Probably not!
 

 

 

 

 
Via Fearnet

Posted by Richard Metzger
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06.07.2013
01:49 pm
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A new way to get in touch with your inner child: Suck on a breast milk lollipop
06.06.2013
04:23 am
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Austin lollipop company, Lollyphile, has introduced a new flavor: breast milk. A very interesting idea that transcends just the flavor thing. Sucking on a lollipop that tastes like mother’s milk could be therapeutic, sending the suckee into childlike rapture and perhaps could be valuable in helping help him or her with certain abandonment issues. Isn’t a lollipop just a substitute for the thumb which is a substitute for the nipple?

Lollyphile owner Jason Darling came up with the mama’s milk lollipop idea after doing some personal research to determine whether or not the taste would be appealing. He ended up replicating the taste of mother’s milk but without actually using any of the human dairy product. Though, his bacon popsicles are made from pigs.

Find out more about Lollyphile and their fascinating range of flavors by visiting their website.

Posted by Marc Campbell
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06.06.2013
04:23 am
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