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You love the Shaggs and Wesley Willis, but have you met Norma Lee?
05.13.2016
09:10 am

Topics:
Music
Unorthodox

Tags:
Outsider music
Norma Lee


 
Oh, the wonders of the Internet. Somehow this one is only now hitting my radar, but boy-oh-boy is it good. Kentucky’s Norma Lee ticks off every check box on my list of what makes an outsider artist truly great: creative use of the form, provocative content, and a complete and utter lack of self-awareness. Like the Shaggs or Wesley Willis before her, Norma Lee is trying her darndest, seemingly oblivious to her own lack of talent in a traditional sense—but all the while being incredibly entertaining.

I adore her Kentucky hills accent. She sounds a bit like a brain-damaged Loretta Lynn when she sings in “He’s Swapping His Boat” about her husband being “retard from a factory.” “He’s Swapping His Boat” is Norma’s big hit. It’s essentially about giving up on every bit of joy in one’s life—specifically her poor husband who had to sell his boat to buy a tractor to clear six acres of land. If you only hear one Norma Lee song in your life, IT MUST BE THIS ONE.

He’s a middle-aged man who needs a hand to help him work his land… he’s just a swappin’ all that fun on that boat, ‘cause he done sowed his oats… now it’s time to get down to earth and put his hands to work.

Forget emo or goth. You want monotone music extolling the bleak reality of absolute depression? Here it is.

Your dreams are dead, get to work:
 

 
After the jump, hear how Norma Lee feels about Paris Hilton, and more!

Posted by Christopher Bickel | Leave a comment
Brutal death metal version of John Cage’s avant garde classical work 4′33’’
05.09.2016
09:05 am

Topics:
Music
Unorthodox

Tags:
John Cage
death metal
4′33″


 
Here at Dangerous Minds, we’ve hipped you to the death metal version of “You’re the One That I Want” from Grease, as well as the death metal version of “Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious” from Mary Poppins, but this right here may be the ultimate “death metal version” of all time.

Depending on who’s doing the talking, John Cage’s 4’33” is either a brilliant minimalist classical masterpiece which challenges the very definition of music, or the greatest musical in-joke of all time, or a pretentious load of horse-shit devised to make you feel dumb because you “just don’t get it.” It’s probably, to varying degrees, some vivid combination of the three.

The band Dead Territory have created their own wickedly unique take on Cage’s vision, and quite frankly it’s one of my favorite performances of this groundbreaking piece of music.

To those of our readers unfamiliar with the piece, I’d rather not spoil it by explaining it before you take in this BRUTAL death metal rendition of the work. The wikipedia page devoted to the controversial 4’33” has plenty of information on the piece, its background, and critical reception.

Without further ado, the absolutely sickest rendition of 4’33” to date. Top this, Internet…
 

 

 

Posted by Christopher Bickel | Leave a comment
The theme music from Hitchcock’s ‘Psycho’... PLAYED WITH KNIVES


 
I recently had a conversation with film composer Harry Manfredini, the guy behind Friday the 13th‘s infamous “tch tch tch…” about the primary influences on modern horror soundtracking and we agreed on the works of Kryzstof Penderecki and Bernard Herrmann being basically ground-zero for fright music for the last 40 years or so of cinematic terror. One specific Herrmann work has informed horror scoring more than any other single piece of music anyone could possibly name: his iconic theme music for Alfred Hitchcock’s masterpiece, Psycho.

A novel rendition of Herrmann’s Psycho theme was recently brought to my attention, and, as covers go, is quite masterful in its own right. Joachim Horsley is a composer and orchestrator for television and film and has a few albums under his belt. His 2014 album Joachim Horsley Was Dead the Whole Time contains this particular version of the Psycho theme as played on a piano… with knives.

Horsley is able to coax some odd tonalities out of the piano strings both with the knife blades and by striking the strings with the knife handle, while muting with his palm. These sounds mimic the orchestration of Herrmann’s original score.

Obviously, there’s both symbolism and novelty going on here with the use of kitchen knives, Norman Bates’ personal weapon of choice, but the end result is quite beautiful. Horsley takes some liberties towards the end of the piece and it gets a bit jazzy (maybe even slightly Latin jazzy?) in its climax. It’s cool though. He owns it.

This KILLER cover version, after the jump…

Posted by Christopher Bickel | Leave a comment
Doll parts: A terrifying glimpse inside doll-making factories from around the world
03.30.2016
09:49 am

Topics:
Pop Culture
Unorthodox

Tags:
dolls
Doll factory

Talking dolls waiting around in a doll factory in France, 1930
Dolls waiting around in a doll factory in France, 1930.
 
When I came across these photos I immediately drew the conclusion that they could have been shot by Alfred Hitchcock during his downtime, as most of them are (and I’m pretty sure it’s intentional), as terrifying as fuck.

Taken over the course of two decades from 1931 - 1955, the images were culled from photos of doll factories in the United States, England, Germany, France and Italy. And I’m not kidding when I say these photos will give you the creeps -  because the photos, such as the one of a group of disembodied, freshly cast doll heads impaled on iron stakes, or say dangling doll legs that are hanging up to dry (pictured below), look like they belong at a gourmet cannibal meat market run by Hannibal Lecter. You can thank me later for not sleeping tonight after checking out the rest of the photos. If you need me, I’ll be under the bed.
 
Dangling doll legs in a factory in England, 1951
Dangling doll legs in a factory in England, 1951.
 
Drying doll heads, 1947
Drying doll heads, 1947.
 
Trimming doll eyelashes, 1949
Trimming doll eyelashes, 1949.
 
Various, not terrifying at all dolls being painted in a doll factory in Italy, 1950
Various rather terrifying looking dolls being painted inside a doll factory in Italy, 1950.
 
More scary dolls after the jump…

Posted by Cherrybomb | Leave a comment
Warning: You cannot ‘unsee’ these Winnie the Pooh masks that come straight from the bowels of Hell
03.21.2016
09:46 am

Topics:
Amusing
Unorthodox

Tags:
Winnie the Pooh


 
Yeah, the packing looks harmless enough, but as they say never judge a book by its cover. Or a facial mask.

Apparently these officially-licensed Winnie the Pooh “relaxation” facial masks are scaring the bejeezus out of users once they get applied to the face. In fact, folks in Japan are taking photos of themselves on Twitter wearing Pooh’s “relaxation” mask and are trying to outdo each other in the creepiness factor. There is absolutely nothing cute about these masks. Nothing.

A warning: You cannot unsee these disturbing images. Proceed with extreme caution.


 

 
More after the jump…

Posted by Tara McGinley | Leave a comment
Just your average cemetery next to a clown motel!?
03.11.2016
08:52 am

Topics:
Unorthodox

Tags:
Clown Motel


 
Nevada’s historic Old Tonopah Cemetery was founded in May 7, 1901 and was active until April 1911 when it outgrew its tiny confines and a larger plot of land was secured elsewhere. The graves consist of a little over 300 folks who succumbed to the “Tonopah Plague.” (Other websites say it’s full of deceased gold miners.)

But that’s not really why I’m posting this, you see right next to the cemetery is a clown motel. Yep you heard me, a clown motel. It’s even called the Clown Motel and it’s located halfway between Reno and Las Vegas, where Route 6 and Route 95 merge.

When you’re lookin’ for a motel in the middle of the desert—especially if you happen to be a clown yourself—why not rest your weary unicycle a clown-themed dwelling adjacent to a cemetery? Totally makes sense, right? Maybe it’s a lil’ on the Stephen King side, but you be the judge…

Anyway, the wood-paneled lobby/office of the motel is packed with inviting toy clowns. With porcelain clowns, portraits of clowns and there’s even a grinning life-size clown that’s sits in a chair and watches every move you make. Not cool.

I wonder if you arrive in full clown make-up if they’ll roll out the red carpet for you. Someone should do that and make a video of what happens.
 

 

 

 
More after the jump…
 

Posted by Tara McGinley | Leave a comment
Diabolic vintage illustrations of ‘spanking machines’
02.19.2016
11:02 am

Topics:
Amusing
Sex
Unorthodox

Tags:
1900s
spanking machines
1800s

An illustration of a
“Strafraum” (“penalty”). A German illustration of a “spanking machine,” 1930s
 
Now before you read any further into this post, you should know that I’m not at all a fan of corporal punishment. However, I am very much a fan of the great lengths inventors and perhaps sometimes kinky “free-thinkers” are willing to go to when it comes to building an automated contraption that does things that a human would normally do.
 
Illustration for a spanking machine, 1800s, UK
Illustration from the UK of a “spanking machine,” early 1800s. The clown is a nice touch, yes?
 

“The cane and the whip in the 19th century,” 1899
 
That said, the “spanking machines” you are about to see in this post, probably never became reality. Is it possible some of them were real? Sure, it’s possible. Whatever the case may be, it appears that as early as the 1800s, a great many people from Australia to Russia and of course the UK and U.S. were dreaming up new ways to spank the crap out of people’s asses. Sometimes for pleasure and sometimes as punishment. While the words pleasure and punishment can be interchangeable in some circles (I don’t judge and neither should you), I can assure you that the vast majority of people in the following images don’t look especially thrilled about what’s happening. That said, I’d consider some of what follows NSFW. Which is usually what you’re going to get if the title of a post includes the words “spanking machines.” Duh.
 
The
The “Rub A Dub Dub” spanking machine. An illustration by fetish artist, John Willie (aka John Alexander Scott Coutts), the founder of ‘Bizarre’ magazine . 1940s
 
More retro spanking contraptions after the jump…

Posted by Cherrybomb | Leave a comment
There’s a Magic 8 Ball Butt-plug
02.17.2016
09:14 am

Topics:
Sex
Unorthodox

Tags:
Buttplugs
magic 8 ball


 
Ah, the Magic 8 Ball: that old classic dimestore novelty oracle. You simply ask it a question, give it a shake, and the answer “mysteriously” appears in a blob of blue liquid in a small window on the underside of the ball.

Well, FINALLY, someone combined the classic pastimes of divination and ass-play. Ladies and gentlemen: The Magic 8 Ball Butt-plug.
 

 
Etsy seller GlowFYourself has created a butt-plug with a Magic 8 Ball attached to the “outside” end. Simply insert the plug, have your partner ask a question, and then give it a little twerk. Your answer will be revealed. The ball knows all.
 

 
“Will this hurt my anus?”

“Signs point to yes.”
 

 
The Magic 8 Ball Butt-plug is only $30—cheap!—from GlowFYourself.

Posted by Christopher Bickel | Leave a comment
Man turns his decades-worth of fingernail clippings into paperweights
01.07.2016
10:18 am

Topics:
Amusing
Art
Unorthodox

Tags:
paperweights


 
I’m sorta speechless with this one. Not gonna lie. 

Anyway, 45-year-old Queens resident Mike Drake collects his fingernail and toenail clippings and turns them into acrylic paperweights which sell for $300 - $500 a pop. It’s called ART, dammit. Try not to be so judgmental.

“I used to bite my nails, and I wondered how long they could grow. And then I wondered how much I might be able to accumulate.”

So he collected his nail clippings in a Ziploc baggie for about a year, and was about to throw them out when inspiration struck. He decided to do something ‘artistic’ with them.

“I realised I went to all that effort, and I figured, in for a penny, in for a pound. I already worked with acrylics as a hobby so I decided to make paperweights.”

Makes sense.

Drake only makes one paperweight weight per year using a greenish-acrylic tint because the jade color “gives off an emerald quality.”

The more you know.


 

 
via WOW and Huffington Post

 

Posted by Tara McGinley | Leave a comment
Stop what you’re doing and watch this insane ‘cooming soon’ trailer for the ‘Ugandan Expendables’
01.06.2016
09:14 am

Topics:
Movies
Unorthodox

Tags:
Uganda
Expendables
Wakaliwood


 
Wakaliga, a small village in Uganda is home to Ramon Film Productions. This small studio has churned out dozens of ultra-low-budget action films in the Ugandan slums which have developed a bit of a cult following on the Internet. The village has been nicknamed “Wakaliwood” and is home to a group of actors, martial artists, stunt-people, and technicians who have signed on with filmmaker Nabwana IGG to make some of the wildest and weirdest z-grade action movies ever seen.

The studio gained some notoriety when their film Who Killed Captain Alex went viral on YouTube.

The hallmark of the Wakaliwood film is lots of fighting and unbelievably over-the-top CGI special defects that are used so shamelessly that you almost forget how terrible they are. There’s something incredibly endearing about these productions. It’s like a modern African take on the whole Little Rascals “let’s put on a show!” aesthetic—peppered with shitloads of fake blood and explosions.

Ramon Film Productions have released a new trailer for their “cooming soon” film, Operation Kakongoliro! The Ugandan Expendables.

Whereas the budget of Who Killed Captain Alex has been stated as $200 USD, this new film has a stated budget of $2000. Obviously that means it’s ten times as good.
 

 
The mind-melting trailer and more, after the jump…

Posted by Christopher Bickel | Leave a comment
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