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Watch the TERRIBLE new trailer for ‘The Three Stooges’ movie
12.07.2011
03:34 pm
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Hey c’mere. Smell this.

It smells like…

(At one point or another, Paul Giamatti, Benicio Del Toro, Sean Penn, Johnny Knoxville, Michael Chiklis and Jim Carey were all being discussed in relation to this atrocity. Methinks these gentlemen dodged career-killing bullets. This looks really, really terrible.)
 

 
Via America’s Funnyman, Neil Hamburger

Posted by Richard Metzger
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12.07.2011
03:34 pm
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10 sexting codes parents should know
12.07.2011
03:18 pm
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A handy guide to sexting in 2011. Do teens and adults really use these?
 
(via The World’s Best Ever)

Posted by Tara McGinley
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12.07.2011
03:18 pm
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Rick Perry: ‘Our kids can’t openly celebrate Christmas and GAYZ R WRONG!’


 
Of course I realize what the answer is to the question (“Because he’s a fucking idiot”) before I ask it, but why does Rick Perry think that a silly TV ad discussing the war on Chris’mus and teh gayz in the military is something that is going to endear him to Iowa caucus voters at a time when a record number of Americans are on food stamps?

And here I thought Republicans had appealing to dummies down to a science. If the Perry campaign is anything to go by, they’re slipping:

“I’m not ashamed to admit that I’m a Christian, but you don’t need to be in the pew every Sunday to know that there’s something wrong in this country when gays can serve openly in the military, but our kids can’t openly celebrate Christmas or pray in school.

As President, I’ll end Obama’s war on religion, and I’ll fight against liberal attacks on our religious heritage. Faith made America strong. It can make her strong again. I’m Rick Perry and I approve this message.”

As a supposedly “national” pol, perhaps Perry should be ashamed to admit that he approved this message. He really makes himself look absolutely fucking pathetic here. And really desperate, too.

According to every single polling I’ve read, even Iowa GOP voters who identify themselves as Tea party supporters do not have a strong interest in social issues with the economy in a state of shambles. Once again Perry ably demonstrates his political tin ear and why he’s just another Republican no-hoper in the party’s quest to oust Obama from the Oval Office.
 

Posted by Richard Metzger
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12.07.2011
03:03 pm
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Palm Trees in Moscow? Fox News fakes Russian election coverage with riot footage from Greece!
12.07.2011
02:16 pm
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Another classic fuck-up from Fox News. Via Animal New York:

Fox News attempted to cover the post-election-fraud protests in Moscow, but decided that the truth wasn’t exciting enough, so they spiced it up with some footage of the riots in Athens, thinking that no one would notice the fucking palm trees.

Yes, Russians feeling duped by Sunday’s documented, obnoxious election fraud are tense and angry, but without the specific fires-in-the-streets and scary revolution-y unrest imagery Fox News would have preferred… so they went ahead and repeatedly transplanted it from Greece.

Superb!

Here’s another winner: Fox News Fabricates Part of U.S. Constitution
 

Thank you Marina Galperina!

Posted by Richard Metzger
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12.07.2011
02:16 pm
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Monstrous Christmas Tree Ornaments
12.07.2011
02:08 pm
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Creepy Christmas ornaments for your tree this holiday season from Michelle Scrimpsheron. You can order them at Michelle’s Etsy shop for around $17.00 per ornament.

Is it just me, or does the top ornament look like an eye from an Ood?
 

 

 
(via Super Punch)

Posted by Tara McGinley
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12.07.2011
02:08 pm
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Republican hypocrites: If you can’t beat ‘em, drug test ‘em!
12.07.2011
01:49 pm
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In a move that will surely cause Georgia politicians of both parties to quake in fear, State Rep. Scott Holcomb (D-Atlanta) flicked the ears of Republicans in the statehouse by filing a bill last Friday requiring all state lawmakers to be drug tested.

The bill came in response to one filed last month by Republicans, who want the state to drug-test parents who apply for federal financial assistance. Holcomb, who represents parts of north DeKalb County, tweeted that “if required for the poor, we [lawmakers] need to do it, too.”

State lawmakers since Nov. 15 have been allowed to submit proposed laws and resolutions in advance of next year’s legislative session, which begins Jan. 9.


Standing ovation!

Follow Rep. Scott Holcomb on Twitter.

Posted by Richard Metzger
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12.07.2011
01:49 pm
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Harmony Korine skateboard decks
12.07.2011
01:02 pm
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Back in October, Supreme released two decks designed by filmmaker/weirdo Harmony Korine which feature a ghostly Macaulay Culkin and a “Shirtless Man.” I’m not sure if they’re still being sold at the Supreme store locations, but I did find them for sale on eBay.

(via Lipstick Tracez)

Posted by Tara McGinley
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12.07.2011
01:02 pm
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Tea party-backed Michigan mayor faces backlash, calls to resign over bigoted anti LGBT comment


Above, Janice Daniels, the beleaguered idiot mayor of Troy, MI.

Tea party favorite, Mayor Janice Daniels of Troy, Michigan, won her first elected office last month. She made national news recently when an unintelligent, unfunny comment she made about gay marriage in New York on Facebook over the summer came back to haunt her:

“I think I’m going to throw away my I Love New York carrying bag now that queers can get married there.”

Daniels’ low IQ “witticism” has gotten her into hot water in Troy. From Detroit News:

Although Daniels has apologized weakly several times, always with caveats, she has yet to suggest she actually understands how she offended real people who live, shop and work in Troy and who are her constituents.

She is getting a short, not too happy, education in the facts of political life — specifically that the kind of sweeping stereotypes that fringe groups applaud don’t play well with the wider electorate, who may include the CEOs of major corporations or the local chamber of commerce.

While Daniels says “I love all people,” her Facebook post emitted the kind of “those people” vibe that created a barrage of Facebook jokes about Troy hairdressers and waiters exacting revenge on the mayor.

“We don’t regard this as statesmanlike or leadership,” said Michele Hodges, president of the Troy Chamber of Commerce. “We’ve been deluged by emails and calls, but we want people to direct their anger, their justifiable anger, at city hall, not at local business.”

Maureen McGinnis, the mayor pro tem, said City Council members had received hundreds of emails, including those from people who said they wouldn’t shop in Troy stores or eat in Troy restaurants.

Hilariously, dum-dum Daniels claims that she is hearing from people who “want to move to Troy” because of her bigoted statements. When Detroit News columnist Laura Berman asked her if she meant that the folks who sent her emails were doing so in support of her small-minded bigotry, Daniels responded with “They agree with my view of moving the city forward.”

How could even a shit-for-brains teabagger like this fruit-loop think that this incident would or could in any way be considered a “win” for the city she represents? If you were a local merchant, how would you feel at having this foolish woman incur a boycott on the town?

There’s only one dignified option for Janice Daniels: RESIGN.

But if she doesn’t, then Daniels’ political platform of advocating for unlimited public comment at Troy City Council meetings when she ran for office, is sure to backfire on her, providing for some uncomfortable, angry confrontations with her LGBT constituents, their families and other correct-thinking residents of the city of Troy, MI. NOT TO MENTION LOCAL MERCHANTS, Mrs. Mayor! It’s already happening, as you can see in the video below.

But just watch, once she’s out of a job—and she’s not going to survive this, nor should she—Fox News will probably race to sign-up Janice Daniels as a commentator on gay and lesbian issues! I mean, wouldn’t she be a great spokesperson for all those Americans who have had their First Amendment rights stomped on by TEH GAY AGENDA?!?!?

Or perhaps there’s a spot for her on Victoria Jackson’s new brain-damaged version of The View? In any case, Daniels says she’s not going anywhere. I don’t think it’s going to play out that way, Mrs. Mayor:
 

Posted by Richard Metzger
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12.07.2011
12:33 pm
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Jodorowsky’s ‘March of the Skulls’: Collective Psychomagic in Mexico
12.07.2011
11:29 am
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Late last month in Mexico City, Alejandro Jodorowsky organized the “March of the Skulls” to disperse negative energy caused by the death toll of the nation’s drug war. Nearly 40,000 Mexicans have died drug war related deaths in the past five years. The advance billing for the November 27th event described it as “the first act of collective psycho-magic in Mexico” and it attracted nearly 3000 people who donned skeleton masks, face-paint, tops hats. Some marchers carried black versions of the Mexican flag and shouted “Long live the dead!”

From the Los Angeles Times:

The “maestro” arrived at the palace steps about 1:30 p.m., causing brief havoc among the gathered calaveras as people jostled to get near him. The white-haired Jodorowsky, fit and agile at 82, wore a black sports coat, a bright purple scarf and a detailed skull mask.

Along with his family, Jodorowsky led the calaveras up the Eje Central avenue to Plaza Garibaldi in a mostly silent demonstration. In the late 1980s, he filmed some key scenes of “Santa Sangre” at this plaza, homebase for the city’s for-hire mariachi bands. On Sunday, it was easy to imagine another “Santa Sangre” scene being filmed during the march, but this time from a dark and unfamiliar future.

Someone decided the group should sing a song. It became “La Llorona,” the Weeping Woman. 

Jodorowsky was displeased with the group’s initial interpretation, so he asked for another go at it. A mariachi band joined in as accompaniment.

“There are 50,000 dead beings,” Jodorowsky said through a bullhorn, before the sea of skulls. “They are sheep. They are not black sheep. We must have mercy for these souls that have disappeared. Let’s sing this song with lament, as if we were the mother of one of these persons. Understand?”

Then he asked that all those present cross and link their arms with those of the strangers around them. The group did. They chanted “Peace, peace, peace!” until Jodorowsky asked that everyone let out a big laugh. Laughter and applause followed.

You have to love that the wiley shaman did the old “c’mon you guys can do better” routine and made them sing it again!
 

 
After the jump, a news report about Alejandro Jodorowsky’s November 27, 2011 Psychomagic event in Mexico.

READ ON
Posted by Richard Metzger
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12.07.2011
11:29 am
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A highly subjective mix of some of the best music of 2011
12.07.2011
01:49 am
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I love year end “best of” lists but recognize that without hearing everything released in any given year it is impossible for these lists to be anything other than an extremely subjective selection of a small fraction of music produced in a twelve month period. The fact that more and more artists are releasing their own work, bypassing the handful of media conglomerates that still exist, music that may be fantastic but few will hear, makes “best of” lists anything but definitive. These lists are just a reflection of what the listmaker (with the help of buzz, promotional hype or through sheer diligence) was able to access in the massive amount of pop culture information available out there.

So this is not my “best of” list for 2011. It’s just some of the best music I encountered in the past year, songs and albums that made me feel good about the state of rock and roll. I also felt a few of these artists deserve more exposure. As the avenues for sharing music expands, some good stuff is getting lost in the shuffle. And artists that don’t need my help are getting some of my love anyway, as in the case of Watch The Throne by Kanye West and Jay Z.

Sometimes hype can distract from music worthy of serious attention. It seems that we’ve returned to an era in which we need to remind uppity Black folk of their place. On the radical tip, Watch The Throne deals with race, power, subjugation and fear of a Black planet with the incisively self-critical, self-defining and proudly defiant attitude that energized Huey Newton’s Revolutionary Suicide. As a musical message, Kanye and Jay Z brought Marvin Gaye’s What’s Going On state-of-the union address into the moment and everybody missed the point. You had better watch the throne, white boy. Blacks have grown tired of proving they can beat you at your own game. Time to level up.  

I listened to a lot of new music in 2011. I’m always looking for a new rock and roll thrill, hoping that some band will give me one of those four hour hard-ons that the Viagra commercials keep warning us about. But most of the stuff out there doesn’t get a rise out of me. Which makes me wonder if I’m just too fucking old and jaded to have those musical experiences that alter the chemistry in my brain.

Listening to the recently released Smile sessions by The Beach Boys reminded me of a time in which rock and roll could be a mindaltering event that occurred between musicians and their audience. We got high together. That collective evolutionary process triggered by rock and roll seems to be a thing of the past. When was the last time a band elevated your consciousness? Is it my problem or the state of the art?

An album that raises the hairs on my neck and seems to aspire to something transcendent is from a band that I knew nothing about until I saw them perform live in Austin this past summer. AWOLNATION’s Megalithic Symphony (don’t let the title put you off) is a stunning pop creation that amazes over the course of 15 beautifully crafted tracks. The brainchild of lead singer, producer and songwriter Aaron Bruno, Megalithic Symphony seamlessly mixes punk, L.A. hardcore, funk, hip hop and pop that recalls some of the best of Prince, The Clash, Trent Reznor, World Party, Shuggy Otis, TSOL, The Stones, Beastie Boys and countless other really good bands…I know it sounds like I’m stretching here, but I’m really not. AWOLNATION is a thrilling compression of several decades worth of rock and roll goodness. Aaron Bruno has the chops to be a major force in music. He could also end up crashing and burning like Terence Trent D’Arby, with whom he shares a brilliant sense of pop craft and psychological complexity (his songs are filled with self-doubt and yearning for redemption). Bruno’s delectable tunes have shiny surfaces that contain dark undertows and his vocals veer from hellbent to heavenly. This cat deserves your attention.

Let England Shake, P.J. Harvey’s lament for EngLand’s lost soul, is the sound of ghosts pressing against the strings of an autoharp and voices fluttering like bleached butterflies from a box of decaying daguerreotypes. Shapeshifter Harvey becomes the militant cry of a woman betrayed by country, seared with the high-pitched pain of a wife mourning the death of husband, brother and father.

Thrice and The War On Drugs create road music that has cost me at least a few gallons of gas as I circle the block, their CDs spinning like hubcaps, giving me all kinds of reasons not to cruise to a stop and shift into park..

EMA’s California is so spookily seductive that I forgive her for getting the state wrong. She took the wrong exit and actually ended up in Las Vegas.

Florence Welch’s machine has erected the sonic equivalent of a Cecil B. DeMille set and the artifice is exhilarating.

Had I heard it in its entirety before putting this mix together, The Black Keys’ El Camino would have made the cut.
  

01. “The Other Shoe” - Fucked Up
02. “Blinded” - Thrice
03. “Midnight City” - M83
04. “California” - EMA
05. “Not Your Fault” - AWOLNATION
06. “No Church In The Wild” - Kanye West/Jay Z
07. “Baby Missiles” - The War On Drugs
08. “I Can See Through You” - The Horrors
09. “Burn It Down” - AWOLNATION
10. “Vessel” - Zola Jesus
11. “Leave My Body” - Florence And The Machine
12. “Human Condition” - Joan As Police Woman
13. “Your Love Is Calling My Name” - The War On Drugs
14. “Revelation Road” - Shelby Lynne
15. “Heroes And Villains” - The Beach Boys (“Smile” re-master)
16. “Written On The Forehead” - P.J. Harvey
17. “Chinatown” - Destroyer
 

Posted by Marc Campbell
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12.07.2011
01:49 am
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