Apparently—I have no direct knowledge of this myself—there is a growing trend in conservative Christian marriages called Christian Domestic Discipline (CDD). While many of its adherents say it’s got nothing to do with fetish. to the outsider looking in, that claim seems absolutely ludicrous. In fact a Christian version of BDSM is exactly what it looks like to me. How could they claim otherwise?!?!
The justification in their minds seems to be of a theological nature, an ass-slapping triad of master. slave and heavenly father! Take out the Christian references to a supernatural power and what is being described here is no different from a bog standard BDSM website.
A husband who enters a DD relationship must be willing to talk to his wife not just about discipline, but about her need to be spanked, what spanking does for her and how she needs it to occur to feel safe, secure, cherished and led. He also needs to be prepared to talk about the sexual aspects of spanking. This is often a touchy subject for Christian couples in DD, because the eroticism of spanking may make them feel kinky and sinful. But a woman’s bottom, I believe, was created not only as an enticement to men but as a target for his hand when she disobeys. God did not separate the two, and neither can we husbands and wives.
Notice how often the word lifestyle is employed in the writing. The fan fiction is a dead giveaway:
Beautiful: A Spanking Romance Collection by Rebeckah Markham
Beautiful is a collection of short stories about married women who have anxiety or concerns about their looks, just like every woman does at one time or another. In “The Plan” Mia convinces her husband, Chris, to use their domestic discipline relationship to help her stick to a diet and exercise plan. In “The Pills” a husband discovers his wife’s secret stash of diet pills. And in “The Haircut” Laura makes a decision to cut her hair very short, without asking permission from her husband. She is encouraged by her friend, Ellie, whose own husband isn’t very happy with her involvement. Beautiful is about women coping with their own insecurities, and about the men who love them anyway. Warning: this collection contains the spanking of adult women.
God’s Design by Lydia Russell
Nikki Russell is sure she has met the man of her dreams in Mason Hart, but Mason isn’t so sure. Nikki’s temper tantrums force him to take action to see if there is a future for them. Will a dose of good old-fashioned discipline fix things for this couple or will insecurities and stubbornness rob them of the mate of God’s design?
If it’s not a zany form of Christian BDSM, then the alternate explanation of CDD must be that it’s a justification for domestic abuse invoking a higher authority. That’s where it transitions from kooky to sinister. One website tells husbands when it’s appropriate to spank their wives in front of the children! The “you’d better keep yourself up, or else” and the “look what you made me do” bullying aspect of this is simply appalling.
Thank you Steven Otero!