Usually, I’m pretty forgiving of social media gaucherie. I’m off Facebook, which certainly helps, but when it comes to Twitter or Instagram, I figure it’s your account, post whatever you want—no one’s forcing me to look at it. People take such personal offense to someone taking a million pictures of their cats/children/food/selves, but they’re going through their own lives—what right have we to demand entertainment or intellectual stimulation from them? We could so easily unfollow if we don’t like what they post.

But I have recently found my breaking point.

You may remember a post I wrote a little while ago on Kara Walker’s giant sculpture of a sugary sphinx. The piece is a gargantuan sphinx coated in sugar, invoking racist “Mammy” imagery of a black woman, and Walker (who yes, is black) is well-known for her use of uncomfortable racial and sexual iconography.

I get that we live in incredibly vulgar times, but Jesus Christ on a Goddamn Pony, you don’t have the presence of mind not to suck face in front of obviously slavery-themed art?

Their Instagram, called “kissmeeverywhere,” is nothing but 642 pictures of them kissing—a monument to performative affections. The description of their profile reads, “Why should we stop kissing? if it’s the best way to remember why we are together.” I’ll give them this, I think that’s probably an accurate statement, since both these people probably require constant reminding that other people exist, including their significant other.
 

 
So let’s get some Photoshops going! I picture the lamprey-lovebirds at the base of of the “The Sculpture of Love and Anguish.” Or maybe locking lips in front of the Hiroshima Peace Memorial? There’s a lovely arch along The Trail of Tears, and I hear there are some truly scenic ex-gulags in the former USSR. Let’s get creative!