It is with a large tip of my heavy metal hair to the excellent Hint Magazine for hipping me to what appears to be a rather bizarre fashion phenomenon afflicting Asian people. The trend in question (or questionable trend if you prefer) concerns the seeming affinity for people of all ages (including children) to wear offensive catchphrase-style t-shirts that are printed in English. Don’t get me wrong, I have no problem whatsoever with anyone who believes their sexy parts taste like Pepsi-Cola and who chooses to wear a t-shirt declaring this to be so. But things get a little murky when the person wearing said shirt (which you’ll see below in all its obnoxious glory) is worn by a teenage boy who most likely has NO idea what the shirt is saying about his, ahem, vagina.
Is there a valid explanation for why an elderly Asian man who probably speaks no English might want to wear a t-shirt with a cartoon rooster proudly declaring “There’s nothing like a stiff cock to wake you up in the morning!”? Sure. There must be. But I have no idea what it is. Can you think of a reason why a child would be wearing a shirt that says “Who the Fuck is Jesus?” Though it’s a valid question, most five-year-olds clearly wouldn’t ponder such a pressing theological question because cartoons are a kids number one priority.
Some of the wearers of these offensive tees were snapped wearing them on the streets of New York City, and presumably know what these humorous slogans mean, adding another layer to the mystery. All I can say is this—the nasty message shirts you’re about to see below are, you guessed it, pretty NSFW.
Oh, the irony.
I secretly want this to be true.
Because of course this kid is a fan of Dead Kennedys.
Previously on Dangerous Minds:
‘MAKE AMERICA HATE AGAIN’: Get your Mexican death metal anti-Trump shirts—from Walmart!
Cinemetal T-Shirts: Iconic film directors remixed with band logos
Slayer, Maiden, Metallica and more in an amazing trove of ‘80s heavy metal shirts
What the actual fuck? Barney’s is selling Black Flag shirts for $265