Mötley Crüe may be no more but they still have plenty of merchandise to sell.

Next month a range of eight Mötley Crüe Vibrators go on sale. These “eye-catching” (eye-catching? You’re obviously doing it wrong…) “vibes” are said to “capture”:

...the style and sex appeal of the band perfectly and deliver the power and pleasure you’d expect from The World’s Most Notorious Rock Band.

But wait there’s more…

Even those unfamiliar with the band are bound to enjoy them just as much thanks to the high quality, intense power and gorgeous designs.

The “vibes” are available in mini- and mid-size and are emblazoned with the iconic typography and distinctive artwork from some of Mötley Crüe’s classic albums:

Classic Skull 10 Function Bullet Vibrator (Gold)
Classic Skull 7 Function Vibrator (Black)
Dr Feelgood 7 Function Vibrator (Black)
Girls Girls Girls 10 Function Bullet Vibrator (Black)
Girls Girls Girls 7 Function Vibrator (Black)
Shout at the Devil 10 Function Bullet Vibrator (Pink)
Shout at the Devil 7 Function Vibrator (Black)
Too Fast For Love 10 Function Bullet Vibrator (Silver)

It would seem you’re not really successful unless you have a vibrator named after you.
 

 
But this is probably a very smart move as more people masturbate today and more frequently than in previous decades. At this very moment 797,151 Americans are masturbating. That’s more than all the people in Alaska! Indeed a few of you good people reading this are probably pleasuring yourselves right now. Which gives us an idea why the sex toy industry is worth $15 billion in the US alone and has projected value of $50 billion by 2020 thanks to recent innovations like the Fleshlight and virtual reality porn.

Mötley Crüe—Vince Neil (vocals), Mick Mars (guitar), Nikki Sixx (bass) and Tommy Lee (drums)—may have sold over 100 million records worldwide but with diminishing returns in record sales, the adult novelty toy industry may prove a highly lucrative future market for ageing rock stars.

You can find your “whole” range of “Excess All Areas” Mötley Crüe vibrators here and a video here.
 
H/T The Reprobate.