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‘Perverse Preachers, Fascist Fundamentalists and Kristian Kiddie Kooks’: Insane Christian cult video
01.27.2022
08:34 am
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“He’s a rewarder of those who seek him. Some say God is a punisher, but do you know what we do with child abusers today? We put child abusers in prison if we find out about ‘em. God is not a child abuser! God is a good god. Why don’t you just say that out loud with me right no? God is a good god, you always remember that! God is not gonna do you harm… (pause) There is a judgement coming someday…”

—“Mrs. Hook” from The Christian Pirates cable access show.

History will note that for a short period at the end of the 20th century, there was this “format” called “VHS” (“Video Home System” is what it stood for) that allowed people to do something called “videotaping” “off” their television sets (it didn’t work exactly like that, but it’s, you know, close enough). But what history might neglect to record is that certain things got passed around from hand to hand on this format samizdat style in what was then called the “VHS tape trading underground.” During the mid-1980s to the late 90s, traders and flea market dealers were making pirated copies of things like the banned Rolling Stones movie Cocksucker Blues, Heavy Metal Parking Lot, “Screaming Boy” (lunatic Dallas public access preacher Jonathan Bell, later made famous by The Daily Show), a tape of a groupie blowing out a candle with her pussy for guitarist Steve Vai and “The Great Satan At Large,” a satanic talk show, among hundreds of other things.

One of the most heavily circulated items during the “VHS tape trading underground” days was a synapse-frying excursion straight into the dark heart of the most deeply disturbed, bat-shit crazy 80s TV evangelism titled “Perverse Preachers, Fascist Fundamentalists and Kristian Kiddie Kooks.”  When the tape began making the rounds in the early 90s, the jaw-dropping selection of low IQ buffoonery, superstitious insanity and wildly inappropriate kiddie shows made by people who should NEVER BE LEFT ALONE UNSUPERVISED WITH YOUNG CHILDREN was the centerpiece of many a weed and alcohol-fuelled viewing fest.

An unnamed Internet reviewer said this of “Perverse Preachers, Fascist Fundamentalists and Kristian Kiddie Kooks”:

Americans: See why the rest of the world thinks we’re a bunch of blithering idiots!

Rest of the world: See why Americans are a bunch of blithering idiots!

That pretty much sums it up in a nutshell.

One of the more perplexing things on exhibit in “Perverse Preachers, Fascist Fundamentalists and Kristian Kiddie Kooks” is the clips from the no budget “Christian Pirates” cable access show where godless children are forced to “walk the plank” by one-legged Captain Hook and they sing songs about hoping that Satan gets paralyzed and has to use a wheelchair. There’s Jimmy Swaggart’s tearful confession of whore mongering (a masterclass in fleecing the faithful with the “I have sinned” ploy). A Jim and Tammy Faye Bakker press conference. There’s a lot of asking for money, natch, some racist Bible prophecy, preaching against something one of them calls “Marxism” and a “joyous” man with hands growing from his shoulders who, er, counts his blessings. It’s not just Christianity that takes a beating here. New Age beliefs are lampooned and there’s even an appearance by Queen Uriel from the nutty Unarius Academy of Science.
 

 
“Perverse Preachers, Fascist Fundamentalists and Kristian Kiddie Kooks” was produced by a Boston-based zine called Zontar. It came with an attached pamphlet that you can see reproduced here. Aside from being a masterpiece of video folk art (YES, this should preserved and elevated to museum status) it’s one of the single best things ever to get stoned and watch. I guarantee you’ll be blown away by “Perverse Preachers, Fascist Fundamentalists and Kristian Kiddie Kooks” (and if you’re not, you’ll be issued a full refund...)
 

 
BONUS VIDEO: Disgraced—but still currently raking it in like a gangsta on BET—TV evangelist Robert Tilton in the infamous “Pastor Gas” video that has made the rounds on the Internet since the first days of MySpace. My VHS copy of “Perverse Preachers, Fascist Fundamentalists and Kristian Kiddie Kooks” included this:
 

Posted by Richard Metzger
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01.27.2022
08:34 am
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Christian fundamentalist group reveals what we already knew: Thom Yorke of Radiohead is EVIL!
08.08.2016
08:34 am
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Thom Yorke is EVIL! (not really).
 
My DM colleague Tara McGinley posted about the unexplainable image of Radiohead’s Thom Yorke on the cover of an Iranian sex manual called Marital and Sexual Problems in Men back in 2015. And since McGinley and I share many of the same curious interests, today I’d like to share another instance of Yorke’s visage being utilized to disseminate religious propaganda, this time by a Christian fundamentalist group called Generation for God. For some reason the group somehow wants us to believe that vices such as drug use, atheism, witchcraft and of course pornography have manifested themselves on Yorke’s mug. 

Because Radiohead is about as Satanic as ABBA I found the claim that Yorkes’ face was a conduit for all things Satanic rather amusing to say the least. Generation of God sent the strange image out via their page on Twitter which depicted Yorke’s face as possessing (or perhaps “possessed of” in this case) the following eight things that Satan will use to “enslave and destroy you”:

Pornography
Atheism
Avarice (aka Greed)
Disobedience to God’s Law
Witchcraft & Tarot
Idolatry
Drugs
Unforgiveness

I’m going to go out on a big fat fake plastic tree limb here and say that I’m pretty sure many DM readers are big fans of most of the vices noted above so this “revelation” by GOG isn’t so much unflattering as it is straight up silly. And as you might imagine the response from fans of the band to the tweet were as hilarious as the original one from the goofy God groupies. So much so that I highly recommend you read through a few of them here.
 
H/T: Digital Music News

Previously on Dangerous Minds:
Ask A Grown Man: Radiohead’s Thom Yorke gives advice to teenage girls, is surprisingly uncreepy

Posted by Cherrybomb
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08.08.2016
08:34 am
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Snake Oil: Use some ‘Blood of Jesus Anointing Oil’ and you too will stop seeing snakes!
08.02.2016
01:49 pm
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(Clears throat)

“In 1972 God spoke to Rev. Woody Martin and told him to lay hands on the building that is now Victory Temple Worship Center, a center of signs, wonders, and miracles following the spoken Word of God.”

So spaketh the poorly-designed website for Rev. Martin’s Bible Deliverance Ministry, located in the town of Lenoir City, Tennessee. It goes on to inform the reader that:

In his first service, God opened the blind eyes of an eight-year-old girl by the “laying on of hands.” Victory Temple is a Bible-believing Pentecostal Deliverance Church where expectations are met through Christ. Thousands have come to Jesus through anointed radio broadcast, publications, television, and miracle crusades. Precious souls have been delivered and set free by the power of God.

Rev. Woody (who also is known as “Prophet Martin” for reasons that are unclear) has another method of achieving unspecified Jesus-related goals and stuff and that is his “The Blood of Jesus Anointing Oil.”

Despite the apparently pedigreed name, “The Blood of Jesus Anointing Oil” is just regular olive oil and red food coloring. Prophet Martin admits to such in the description.

“It is regular olive oil which represents the Holy Spirit and a special coloring to make it look red thus we call it “The Blood of Jesus Anointing Oil.” There is no virtue or healing in this oil, it is a point-of-contact and an act-of-faith.”

You see, for it to work, you only have to believe! (And if it doesn’t work then obviously you are not believing HARD ENOUGH.)

“The Bible says in Mark 6:13, “And they cast out many devils, and ANOINTED with oil many that were sick, and Healed them!” Jesus’ disciples used this unusual ministry to bring healing and deliverance to the sick and oppressed. They would anoint them with a little oil that God had blessed by His Holy Spirit. The oil alone had no power, but when saturated by prayer, it became the Holy Spirit’s point of power for bringing deliverance to people.”

It’s not like he and his wife can legally be, you know, accused of cheating anyone with such an honest description, right? And if it works, then it works, right? Who am I to shit on an old couple’s hobby? Besides that, the first vial is free for the asking. (They also got “healing” DVDs, Rev. Woody’s music, ways to lose weight through the Lord, all kinds of stuff, in the online store.)

Some of the many uses for Mr. and Mrs. Woody Martin’s “The Blood of Jesus Anointing Oil” are the warding off of witchcraft, protection from the evil eye, reversing bad luck and the effects of evil hoodoos, leprachauns and so forth. But it’s also good for the removal of snakes.

You heard me right: The removal of snakes. Apparently this shit works great for that. Listen to the testimonial below and praise Jesus!
 

Above, Mrs. Woody Martin proudly reads a letter from one of their satisfied “Blood of Jesus Anointing Oil” customers! Use this oil and you, too, will stop seeing snakes!

Posted by Richard Metzger
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08.02.2016
01:49 pm
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‘Doorways to Danger’: Christian occult scare film warns of gateways to Satanism
12.29.2014
09:22 am
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Woman playing ouija board
 
Doorways to Danger is a 1990 British short film warning of the risks in flirting with the occult. Here’s the description from the Amazon listing:

Dabbling in the occult is widespread and often thought of as harmless entertainment. But this video shows why it is dangerous to get involved with spiritism, fortune telling, witchcraft, magic, and Satanism. The program introduces the real life stories of those who have been involved in these activities and shows the way out based upon a Biblical perspective.

A description also opens the video, and what comes next is pure gold: A cheesy montage of occult images with a song poem-esque number underneath warning of the hazards of looking up your horoscope and fooling around with a ouija board. And we’re off!

The anecdotal evidence that follows—offered up by supposed experts and decidedly non-experts alike—often seems scripted and/or total B.S., and the “slippery slope” examples given as gateways to full on devil worship (playing Dungeons and Dragons; watching Ghostbusters II!) are a hoot-and-a-half. One of the highlights is the segment with the band Heartbeat (“one of Britain’s top Christian groups”), who we get to see recording and then have an obviously rehearsed conversation about occult dabbling. The late ‘80s fashions they’re sporting will also surely induce a chuckle or two (and dig those hairdos!).

The video was produced by an organization calling itself the “Christian Response to the Occult.” Forming in 1982 by the Deo Gloria Trust, “to give a Christian answer to the inroads that occultism was making into society at that time,” the group later merged with the existing and ideologically similar, Reachout Trust.

Here’s Tom Poulson, the director of the CRO and the man behind Doorways to Danger:

We have a divine commission both to warn and inform our friends, family and neighbours that there is an enemy of God, actively engaged in both blinding them to and drawing them away from Jesus. We neither want to shout ‘FIRE!’ so loudly that people rush towards it, nor remain silent and see people receive life-endangering burns from their involvement with the occult.

Indeed, no one actually shouts “FIRE!” in Doorways to Danger, but to say that believing in things like “bad luck” could lead you into the arms of Satan comes pretty damn close.
 

Posted by Bart Bealmear
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12.29.2014
09:22 am
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God (apparently) has big plans for the kooky Christian Monster Energy drink conspiracy theory lady!


 
She’s baaacckk. Already? Remember the Christian Monster Energy drink satanic conspiracy theory lady from last week? Well…improbably (or not so improbably) she’s back on our radar screens again.

This time Christine Weick was caught on video disrupting a Muslim prayer service being held at the National Cathedral on Friday, November 14th.

She told conservative Christian conspiracy theory website WorldNetDaily that God got her past security and that she hid in the bathroom praying over and over again before she realized that she had become “invisible.” When the Imam called for prayer Weick stood up and shouted:

“Jesus Christ died on that cross. He is the reason we are to worship only Him. Jesus Christ is our Lord and Savior,” she said. “We have built …allowed you your mosques in this country. Why don’t you worship in your mosques and leave our churches alone? We are a country founded on Christian principles.”

She immediately heard voices in the crowd yelling for security.

One might suppose that Ms. Weick has been hearing voices for some time now.

She worried that she’d flub her carefully rehearsed lines and look like an idiot, but believes “it didn’t happen that way”—contrary to the videotaped evidence!

So this is not Weick’s first or even second brush with notoriety, it is (at least) her third—she got a Slushie thrown in her face in front of a news crew on Mother’s Day as she held a sign reading, “Thank your mom today for not being gay!”—we just didn’t know her name until now. In the sub-Drudge reader sector of wingnuts within wingnuts, Weick, who lives out of her car and has authored the book Explain This! A Verse by Verse Explanation of the Book of Revelation, is already being held up as a Christian martyr “hero” and not someone who needs to be fucking medicated, stat.

She claims that it was a “thumbs up” from a “strange” clapping woman along her 400 mile drive from Tennessee to the nation’s capitol that she took as a sign from God convincing her that she was doing the right thing. Weick’s husband apparently divorced her over her goofy beliefs. More from WND (where the comments are pure mental midget genius!):

“It was a situation in my life, how God yanked every anchor in my life over the last five years, just everything that would keep a normal woman, a normal mother, at home just got yanked out from under me,” she said. “I have a son and a daughter, and they disowned me. I took a stand against gay marriage and I lost them. That is my heartache. And it hurts me so much. And I wonder what they think now when they see me on the news.”

Weick said she doesn’t know what her next “assignment” will be, but she knows now she can tackle almost anything.

“I told the Lord last night, ‘OK, you can take me now,’ but I don’t know,” she said. “I think He may have other plans for me, per Jeremiah 29: 11.”

Oh Lord, please do not take her. Christine Weick is one of the very BEST Christians in America. Maybe THE best. What a fine example of a good Christian to point to (at?). Time will tell what plans God has for this zany lady, but all I can say is watch out Victoria Jackson, you’ve got fierce competition in the Christian dingbat department.

It also occurred to me that wacky William Tapley, who bills himself as the “co-prophet” of the End Times, has never really seemed to find his duet partner. What if it’s Christine? Let’s hope they’re both on Christian Mingle, right? They could make beautiful music together!
 

 
Via Christian Nightmares

Posted by Richard Metzger
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11.17.2014
11:09 am
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‘Our Father, who art in Mordor…’: Hilarious reviews of Tolkien-themed prayer ring
07.22.2014
04:07 pm
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ringalone
 
I’ve been far too engrossed by the amusingly vitriolic negative reviews of protein supplement shakes on Amazon and almost missed the gloriously geeky reviews of one of the most absurd products of all time:  a men’s black ring with the text of the Lord’s Prayer written in Elvish script.
 
ringdescription
 
According to Wikipedia: “The Tengwar are an artificial script created by J. R. R. Tolkien. In his fictional universe of Eä, the tengwar were invented by the Elf Fëanor, and used first to write the angelic tongue Valarin and the Elven tongues Quenya and Telerin. Later a great number of languages of Middle-earth were written using the tengwar, including Sindarin.” 

Here are a few highlights:

Exactly what I wanted. Lovely ring. Well made. I’m only giving it a 4, because it is a little uncomfortable. But my plans for world domination are now coming along quite nicely. The included power to command the wraiths has been very convenient.


Stainless? I don’t think so. This ring is supposedly stainless steel, but the mark it left on my soul will never be healed. Beware, my friend, beware.


Simply precious! I love this beautiful ring. It’s my favorite thing in the whole wide world. Although, ever since I’ve started wearing it, I feel like someone is stalking me. He follows me constantly, staring at me from the shadows, mumbling and hissing. He wants to take the ring.


I bought this ring as a weight-loss aid. I’m giving it only three stars, because while it did help me lose weight, it left me feeling thin, and stretched, like butter spread over too much bread.


Special Care Instructions. I found this ring to be of fantastic quality and very durable - at one point my friend had hit it with an ax with no noticeable damage. However, I would suggest the following tips when caring for this ring:

1. Keep it secret
2. Keep it safe


I keep mine in an envelope and this works very well.


Didn’t last very long. Wanted as family heirloom to last several generations unfortunately they neglect to list that it’s Not lava proof, #thoroughly disappointed.

Via io9.

Posted by Kimberly J. Bright
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07.22.2014
04:07 pm
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Epic End of the World Christian Film Festival: The ‘Rapture series,’ the original ‘Left Behind’
07.14.2014
05:06 pm
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Although it was once a notion with widespread cultural currency among the more superstitious American evangelicals of the 1970s and early 80s, the “credit cards = ‘the Mark of the Beast’” belief has largely died off, no doubt a casualty of the fact that nearly everyone has one, and so far at least no devilish Antichrist has shown up to lay claim to our immortal souls.

In fact, searching for “credit cards” and “Mark of the Beast” on Google today brings up just 35,000 results, belying just how wildly popular that belief once was, mostly fuelled by best-selling books like Hal Lindsey’s paranoiac blockbuster The Late, Great Planet Earth (which sold nearly 30 million copies to a nation that then numbered just over 200 million) and its sequels, Satan is Alive and Well and Living on Planet Earth and The 1980s: Countdown to Armageddon. Dog-eared copies of all three books could be easily found in practically any Christian church of the era, and every garage sale.

Among Lindsey’s readers were future US president Ronald Reagan, and my parents, who used only cash and checks, and refused to get a credit card due to Lindsey’s assertion that they were the first step to “The Beast” taking over. (When they shockingly got one in the 1990s, I reminded my mother that she used to believe credit cards were the “Mark of the Beast” and she brushed me off as if there was no truth to the matter whatsoever. That’s not the way I remember it…). The Hal Lindsey books, Chick tracts and other assorted “end of the world” literature was basically all there was to read in church and I became quite an expert in the genre, although not intending to become one. What I want to impress upon readers who weren’t born yet, or who lived outside of the Bible belt, is that these kinds of premillennialist beliefs were a part of many, I’d say most, evangelical Christian churches in America at that time. These books could be found pretty much everywhere. (The Da Vinci Code author Dan Brown has sold but a fraction of the books Hal Lindsey has sold, to put it into perspective.)

After a certain point probably when I would have been a high school sophomore, my beleaguered mother and father finally tired of arguing with me about going to church with them, but one of the final things I have any memory of that I experienced there was a pot luck dinner event held in the church basement where these people came and showed three movies, one that I immediately recognized when I saw it linked on the Christian Nightmares blog yesterday.
 

 
A Thief in the Night, A Distant Thunder and Image of the Beast were shown in one marathon Saturday late morning to late afternoon screening that featured a lot of scalloped potatoes, green bean casseroles, fried dumplings, rump roast, Swedish meatballs, cakes, brownies, cookies and stuff like that. Although, these films (and one more titled The Prodigal Planet) known together as either the “Rapture” (or sometimes the “Thief”) series, seem rife with goofy fashions, stiff acting, a lot of preaching and anachronistic beliefs, not to mention being the victim of low, low budgets, they are not entirely unwatchable. I remember being entertained by them with their elements of supernatural horror, paranoia, conspiracy theories and silly plotlines. Bear in mind that the series could be seen as a parallel version of Hollywood’s Omen films, which, after all feature a “Biblical” character, so there several levels on which to appreciate these movies (“Christian camp” being the biggest by quite some margin. They’re lame and fascinating at the same time. Try watching the films through the eyes of someone in the 70s, a decade where a clever horror film like The Exorcist was taken very, very seriously by religious persons.)

The “Rapture” films, directed by Donald W. Thompson and produced by Russell S. Doughten Jr. were hugely influential on the Left Behind book series, indeed they served as the primary influence, as acknowledged by authors Tim LaHaye and Jerry B. Jenkins. It’s claimed that the films have been seen by some 300 million people around the world, many who were deeply affected by the thought that they themselves might be “left behind” when the Rapture occurs. I’m sure they gave a lot of gullible people and children many a terrible nightmare.

Which was, of course, the entire point to begin with: Scare ‘em straight! Pascal’s wager on a $60,000 budget!
 

 

 
More after the jump…

READ ON
Posted by Richard Metzger
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07.14.2014
05:06 pm
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The worst, most bass slappinest Christian cover version of ‘Stairway to Heaven’ EVER
03.24.2014
11:07 am
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A “Stairway to Heaven” double-header over at Christian Nightmares this morning. First up is Bold for Jesus, a former rocker who is now a “radical” Christian YouTuber. I think his definition of radical can be gleaned from his “Christian yelling” videos, such as this one, where he shouts stuff at cars for 16 minutes in front of a Toyota dealership.

Here’s his own description of what ye of little faith are about to receive:

I have not played the real Stairway To Heaven song since 1981. You can hear me talk at the end about slamming a pie on top of a teacher’s head. I had fun. I lived a radical rock n’ roll life for 10 years, and now I live radical for Jesus Christ.

Yes, this is the worst, most bass slappinest for Jesus cover of “Stairway to Heaven” that has ever existed. It goes on forever, but it gets funnier and funnier as forever plods goofily along. Then he tells a story about an absolutely hilarious (well hilarious to him) high school pie throwing incident.
 

 

Posted by Richard Metzger
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03.24.2014
11:07 am
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‘Christianity was a hoax’ and scholar claims he has the proof
10.09.2013
07:56 pm
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Covert Messiah
 
To the question Was Jesus Christ a real person? American biblical scholar Joseph Atwill says, “The short answer is no.”

Oh boy! This ought to be fun.

On October 19 Atwill will present some provocative new findings in London. Atwill’s thesis is that the New Testament was written by first-century Roman aristocrats who fabricated the entire story of Jesus Christ. Per Atwill: “The Caesars committed a crime against consciousness. They reached into the minds of their subjects and planted false concepts to make them easier to control.” Atwill claims to have iron-clad proof of his claims.

Atwill’s most intriguing discovery came to him while he was studying “Wars of the Jews” by Josephus—the only surviving first-person historical account of first-century Judea—alongside the New Testament.
 

I started to notice a sequence of parallels between the two texts. Although it’s been recognised by Christian scholars for centuries that the prophesies of Jesus appear to be fulfilled by what Josephus wrote about in the First Jewish-Roman war, I was seeing dozens more. What seems to have eluded many scholars is that the sequence of events and locations of Jesus ministry are more or less the same as the sequence of events and locations of the military campaign of [Emperor] Titus Flavius as described by Josephus. This is clear evidence of a deliberately constructed pattern. The biography of Jesus is actually constructed, tip to stern, on prior stories, but especially on the biography of a Roman Caesar.

 
Here’s a promo video about Atwill and his findings:

 
(Thanks to Ron Kretsch!)

Previously on Dangerous Minds:
Jesus tells man to smash police car windows with baseball bats
Couple see face of Jesus in Wal-Mart receipt

Posted by Martin Schneider
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10.09.2013
07:56 pm
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Every Young Man’s Battle: Hilariously over the top Christian anti-porn documentary with Ted Bundy
08.27.2013
08:43 pm
Topics:
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First up, a “trash compactor” cut of the incredibly earnest Christian anti-porn film, Every Young Man’s Battle.

My favorite part comes when the fat kid invites the guilty ginger… er, wanker (not that he seems like a bad person, I’m just being descriptive here) over to his [most assuredly no girls allowed] porn-watching party and then excuses himself to pick up “some special buzz juice, if you catch my drift...”

Oh, but we do.
 

 
If that taster wasn’t enough for you, please feel free to watch the entire thing below. Dig the football coach guy explaining to the boys how to go on the defense against yanking their cranks. And that sublime Ted Bundy interview conducted by Dr. James Dobson, founder of Focus on the Family, on the very day before he was executed in 1989.

Porn leads straight to death row! Heavy-handed much? Nah!

Every Young Man’s Battle was produced in 2003, but it’s so dated that it seems like something made ten years earlier. It’s worth mentioning that many Bundy biographers cite multiple instances of him saying that he had almost no interest whatsoever in pornography. The Dobson interview is considered by many to be Bundy’s final chance to manipulate the public’s perception (and why Dobson, specifically, was granted the interview). Bundy also blamed alcohol and brainwashing by the TV as reasons why he became a serial killer, so take his confession here with a hefty dollop of salt.
 

 
Via Christian Nightmares

Posted by Richard Metzger
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08.27.2013
08:43 pm
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‘If God Loves Me, Why Can’t I Get My Locker Open?’: The book every Christian teenager should read
07.26.2013
01:44 pm
Topics:
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Haven’t we all asked ourselves this question? No? Yeah, me neither.

The Amazon reviews are very hit or miss with Lorraine Peterson’s If God Loves Me, Why Can’t I Get My Locker Open?

DeGinner gives it one star and writes:

Well this book is no help at all, as a Christian who forgot my locker combination I really thought this was the book for me but nope! It has no advice for opening lockers, in the end all that was needed was a screwdriver and a crowbar, the worst part is my locker got stuck again, and this book was inside! God might be testing me but I’m really starting to doubt my faith.

Whatarelief gives it five stars and writes:

My locker had been stuck all year. When in desperation I turned to this book. It didn’t contain anything about lockers, but was full of stories about how some Mexican guy loved me. Frustrated, I threw the book at my locker and it popped right open! I threw it at a few other lockers hoping to plunder what was inside, but nothing happened. I guess there’s only enough magic in each book for one locker. I wouldn’t recommend buying a used one because it may already be spent.

Ryan Gosling gives it five stars and writes:

This book is glorious. I now understand how to create transmutation circles and chant the names of Leviathan, Baal, and Beelzebub.

Image via Christian Nightmares

Posted by Tara McGinley
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07.26.2013
01:44 pm
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North Carolina church refuses to perform any marriages until gays can marry
03.19.2013
10:45 am
Topics:
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image
 
Salon reports that the Green Street United Methodist Church in Winston-Salem will stop performing weddings for straight couples until same-sex marriage is legal in North Carolina (Emphasis added):

As an Anti-Racist, Reconciling Congregation, Green Street United Methodist Church seeks to be in faithful ministry with all people in the brokenness of our world. This statement is being adopted as a sign of our commitment to love and justice for all people.

The Marriage Covenant between two people is a ministry of the church. Couples making a commitment to one another need a supportive community of faith to sustain and uphold them so as to grow in faith and love. Weddings are the occasion for covenant making, a time to seek God’s blessing on their commitment to one another. When a couple chooses to be married in the church, they should also be conscious that they are making a declaration of their relationship as a new ministry for the congregation and the world. At Green Street Church, we claim the committed same-sex relationships as no less sacred in their ministry to us and the community.

But sadly, at this time in the United Methodist Church, marriages, weddings and holy unions are limited to heterosexual couples. As our nation struggles to provide legal recognition to people in same-sex relationships and provide them the privileges allotted to opposite-sex married couples, our denomination struggles to overcome the sin of reserving these sacramental privileges for straight people only. We, the leaders of Green Street Church, see people in same-sex relationships as completely worthy of the Sacrament of Marriage. We reject any notion that they are second class citizens in the Kingdom of God.

WOW. Just wow. That’s some statement.

Tell me again, “What Would Jesus Do?”

Although support for gay marriage has reached a new high of 58% of the American public—including 81% of 18-29 year olds—same sex marriage is constitutionally prohibited in North Carolina. It’s worth mentioning that the Green Street United Methodist Church are also bucking the 2012 vote of their own church elders by supporting gay marriage rights. 59% of Catholics, 62% of independents, and 34% of Republicans are pro-gay marriage according to recent polling.
 
image
 

Posted by Richard Metzger
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03.19.2013
10:45 am
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Losing My Religion: How Christian conservatives are forcing the young from the faith

image
 
On a blog post that’s been shared tens of thousands of times in the past few days, Rachel Held Evans, author of A Year of Biblical Womanhood writes of how Christianist haters like Tony Perkins, Maggie Gallagher and Bryan Fischer are forcing younger Christians to chose between their gay friends and their religion.

From “How to win a culture war and lose a generation”:

When asked by The Barna Group what words or phrases best describe Christianity, the top response among Americans ages 16-29 was “antihomosexual.” For a staggering 91 percent of non-Christians, this was the first word that came to their mind when asked about the Christian faith. The same was true for 80 percent of young churchgoers. (The next most common negative images? : “judgmental,” “hypocritical,” and “too involved in politics.”)

In the book that documents these findings, titled unChristian, David Kinnaman writes: “The gay issue has become the ‘big one,’ the negative image most likely to be intertwined with Christianity’s reputation. It is also the dimensions that most clearly demonstrates the unchristian faith to young people today, surfacing in a spate of negative perceptions: judgmental, bigoted, sheltered, right-wingers, hypocritical, insincere, and uncaring. Outsiders say [Christian] hostility toward gays… has become virtually synonymous with the Christian faith.”

Later research, documented in Kinnaman’s You Lost Me, reveals that one of the top reasons 59 percent of young adults with a Christian background have left the church is because they perceive the church to be too exclusive, particularly regarding their LGBT friends. Eight million twenty-somethings have left the church, and this is one reason why.

Rachel Held Evans has closed comments on her essay, writing “I want to keep this a safe place for conversation.”

You won’t wonder why after you’ve read the responses from some of her supposedly Christian readers…
 
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Via Dan Savage/Joe.My.God

Posted by Richard Metzger
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05.16.2012
03:52 pm
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Study finds that Christianity related to brain atrophy
03.27.2012
01:53 pm
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Interestingly enough, this item comes to you courtesy of the kooks at WorldNet Daily. Not really the kind of thing you’d expect to find there among the ads for hardcore survivalist supply companies, books like “The Islamic Invasion” and anti-Obamacare PACs, but there it was…

According to WND a study published last year found that a part of the brain atrophied more rapidly in Catholics and “born-agains” than it did in more “mainline” Protestants.

The study called “Religious Factors and Hippocampal Atrophy in Late Life” was published online by the Public Library of Science last year. Since then, it’s been mentioned by blogs and medical sites but generally has not reached into mainstream reporting.

“The findings of this study indicate that hippocampal atrophy in late life may be uniquely influenced by certain types of religious factors,” write the authors, led by Amy D. Owen of the Center for the Study of Aging at Duke University. Several of her colleagues joined in the report.

The review noted that there have been few studies regarding the relationship between religious factors and structural neuroanatomy, “despite a growing interest in the ways spiritual beliefs and practices are reflected in brain activity.”

The piece goes on for a bit in a more or less neutral “journalistic” tone, then concludes with an explanation (of sorts) that is more in line with what we think of as the typical kooky WorldNet Daily party line:

“This study is among the first to examine religious and spiritual correlates of structural neuroanatomy, identifying several understudied factors associated with hippocampal atrophy,” said the analysis. “Religious factors, including religious group membership and life-changing religious experiences, but not frequency of public and private religious practices, were longitudinally associated with hippocampal atrophy.

“Atrophy in this region has important clinical implications, having been identified as a marker of late life mental health problems such as depression and dementia. These results may reflect an impact of cumulative stress on hippocampal volume.”

That Christians face stress is no surprise.

Newberg cited “persecution,” and a survey done for WND last year showed that 49.2 percent consider the legal activism against Christians and their beliefs regarding homosexuality in the United States to be “persecution.”

And that “persecution,” according to just about one in three Democrats, is “necessary.”

That many Christians seem to honestly believe that they are the targets of persecution for their blinkered and bigoted views on homosexuality is plenty of evidence of atrophied brains, if you ask me…

Posted by Richard Metzger
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03.27.2012
01:53 pm
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Failed end of the world prophet Harold Camping getting out of the Rapture business


Above, a fucking idiot.

Harold Camping, the 89-year-old coot preacher who achieved fame for repeatedly getting the date of “The Rapture” wrong says he finds his situation “embarrassing” and is getting out of the prophecy business. Probably a good idea at his age… and with his track record!

“We’re living in a day when one problem follows another, and when it comes trying to recognize the truth of prophecy we’re finding it very, very difficult,” Camping said in an audio file posted to his Family Radio website yesterday. Via the NY Daily News:

Camping has made several predictions about the end of the world over the years. He claimed the end was nigh in 1994, then again in May of this year. When that didn’t happen, he said it would be Oct. 21.

“Why didn’t Christ return on Oct. 21?” he asked. “It seems embarrassing for Family Radio, but God is in charge of everything.”

The minister noted that no matter what people may think is in the Bible, ultimately God has the final word and isn’t obligated to reveal his plans.

“There’s one thing that we must remember,” Camping said. “God is in charge of this whole business, and we are not. What God wants to tell us is his business, when he wants to tell us is his business.”

The failed prognosticator also said he was sorry for saying that anyone who didn’t believe in his incorrect predictions would not be saved.

“I should not have said that and I apologize,” Camping said.

The Oakland-based preacher added that just because he was wrong, people shouldn’t lose their faith.

“We should not for a moment feel that we’ve been abandoned by God,” he said.

Really? Why not? I’m sure that schmuck who spent his pension on those “repent the end is near” subway posters feels pretty alone right about now…

Posted by Richard Metzger
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11.01.2011
02:05 pm
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