The Bath Township Police Department in Michigan is making meth users with Zika contamination concerns an offer they can’t refuse. With a Facebook post containing a “breaking news” graphic warning of reports that crystal meth could be contaminated with the Zika virus, the police department has offered free testing of the drug in the interest of “public safety.”
This is similar to a post made by the Salley Valley Police Department in South Carolina in March offering free screening, adding that they make “house calls.”
Oh you cheeky coppers, everyone knows Zika doesn’t infect DRUGS. This sounds suspiciously like a labor-saving ploy to get meth addicts to come to you with their drugs.
Well played, officers. We almost have to give you credit for this one. Though we’ll have to see if anyone actually takes the bait—Zika is not typically a primary concern for most meth users. Generally speaking, the primary concern of most meth users is WHERE CAN I GET SOME MORE METH.
A double dose of alarming news today from the drug front. First, I read the AP‘s account of a new, DIY approach to amphetamine production that “does away with the clutter of typical meth labs, turning the backseat of a car or a bathroom stall into a makeshift drug factory.” The ingredients are few—cold pills, a soda bottle, some common household chemicals. The method is simple—pills are crushed, then shaken in the bottle with the liquids. After everything fizzes out, what’s left is a crystalline powder that users smoke, snort or inject. And there it is: meth-making without the lighting of a single match.
A major plus since cooking it up Breaking Bad-style can sometimes trigger fires, explosions, and the release of byproduct ingredients similar to toxic waste. But while this “shake-and-bake” method has caused a spiking in meth-related arrests throughout Oklahoma and Missouri, it’s by no means foolproof:
If there is any oxygen at all in the bottle, it has a propensity to make a giant fireball,” said Sgt. Jason Clark of the Missouri State Highway Patrol’s Division of Drug and Crime Control. “You’re not dealing with rocket scientists here anyway. If they get unlucky at all, it can have a very devastating reaction. One little mistake, such as unscrewing the bottle cap too fast, can result in a huge blast.”
Thanks, I’ll remember that during my next Palmdale picnic!
Because Big Pharma‘s involved, I find today’s second dose of news more alarming than the first. While I was thumbing through the latest issue of Parents (I just read it for the articles!), I paused on an ad for the Bristol-Myers Squibb drug, “Abilify,” which seems designed to combat depression, even schizophrenia.
But Abilify’s not some run-of-the-mill anti-depressant like Prozac or Paxil. No, because “approximately 2 out of 3 (!) people being treated for depression still have unresolved symptoms,” Abilify’s been designed to take ON TOP of those drugs, a supplement to the supplement you’re already taking. An anti-depressant chaser, if you will! Oh, Bristol-Myers, you’ve sure got your finger on the pulse of self-medicating America! But where does it all end—chasers for the chaser?
Of course, the usual disclaimers warning you of the possible meltdown of your bodily functions haunt the Abilify print ad (as well as the following video). Above all else, these ads warn, “Talk to your doctor.” Hmm…I’m pretty sure millions of Americans are now finding it utterly depressing to be without heathcare. Hey, Bristol-Myers: to whom should they be speaking to?!
I spotted on Japan Probe this possibly Reefer Madness-inspired bit of anti-meth propaganda. If it looks hastily assembled, it’s not surprising: The Japanese government released the video shortly after beloved singer and actress, Noriko Sakai (aka Nori-P), was arrested on “suspicion of possessing stimulant drugs.”
