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Playground Bully: This BRILLIANT anti-Trump video needs to be quietly POSTED ALL OVER FACEBOOK NOW!

At this point, it’s a question that’s been pondered—quite a lot—by the professional political pondering class:

Is it even possible to change the mind of the hardcore Donald Trump supporter?

Is there any argument whatsoever that would sway the steadfast fan of the anus-mouthed orangey-faced bellowing billionaire fascist blowhard who sits atop the Republican ticket? Stupid is gonna stupid, and if there is one thing that this year’s election has accomplished it’s demonstrating that the American electorate is—scientifically speaking—much dumber than many of us would have liked to believe. There’s no other way to explain it. Why bend to political correctness—the great bugaboo of reichwingers everywhere, of course—when the simplest and most obvious statement of fact will suffice:

Trump voters are fucking idiots, if they weren’t idiots, they wouldn’t be Trump voters.

Sorry, but Aristotle himself couldn’t have put it any more succinctly than I just did. Not Wittgenstein either.

Oh yes, the Great IQ Stratification©—as I like to call it—has already occurred. It’s been pretty obvious to anyone with a functioning brain since at least Sarah Palin was unleashed foaming at the mouth with her unique form of racist dog whistle glossolalia that only stupid people can hear, that we’re well past that point.

Think about it: In THIS spacetime continuum, the real-life inspiration for Back to the Future‘s caricature bully Biff Tannen is the Republican nominee.

If Trump wins, Amy Goodman will have to change the name of her NPR show to “Idiocracy Now.”

Ha ha ha ha ha. If you get these jokes, and of course you do, you’re not a Trump voter—amIrite?—and that’s the problem, the self-reinforcing echo chamber of the Internet. Hell, I’ve written some nasty shit about Trump for years on Twitter and on this blog, and all I ever get are “atta-boys” from people who also hate Trump and his incoherent minions. Even when I am trying my level best to be condescending and deliberately rude, no one within the sound of my tweets ever disagrees with me. They feel about the terroristic man-toddler©  (thank you Charles M. Blow) the same way I do. “We” all loathe Trump. I’m just tweeting to the choir.

[Amusingly one of the rare times that anyone whatsoever has sent me any pushback on any of my anti-Trump tweets and retweets was none other than Trump advisor, frequent guest on The Alex Jones Show and complete shithead Roger Stone, who must search for his own name constantly. Then I sent him this. It was fun. Bigly fun. I love Twitter!]

But going back to the original question, is there anything—any fact, TV commercial, slogan, viral video, bumper sticker—whatever—that would change the minds of soft-brained morons who would happily line up to vote for Biff Tannen? Something that you could make them watch, with eyes pinned open like Alex DeLarge in A Clockwork Orange that would get through to them or make a difference?

Maybe there is. The video below, made by the Patriotic Artists & Creatives PAC—which features an actual terroristic man-toddler standing in for the one who used to host The Apprentice—might be able to pry even the tightest shut minds open for a second.

Wisdom from the mouths of babes? It’s perhaps the only thing that would work on the simpleton Trump voters. Best that I’ve seen, anyway. So post it everywhere. The video, I mean, probably don’t repost this blog on Facebook, that’s just being mean (and they won’t get the jokes anyway)

What country do you want your children to grow up in?

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Too dumb to make up: 73-year-old man snorts coke while police officer runs his driver’s license!
01:00 pm



In this truly ridiculous—and yet truly true—holiday PSA from the Seattle Police Department, a 73-year-old man who was stopped by a patrolman for not having his headlights on panics and does something incredibly stupid.

When I watched this, I was as incredulous as the utterly stupefied arresting officer was when it happened. He can’t believe what transpires. Neither will you. There’s dumb and then there is DUMB. The motorist is a 73-year-old WHITE GUY, too. All he had to do was sit there and not… well… do what he did!

From the SPD’s blog:

Officer Nic Abts-Olsen was patrolling in the Colman neighborhood near Martin Luther King Jr. Way South and South Massachusetts around 8:30 PM when a man in a silver Toyota drove past him with his headlights off.

After pulling over the 73-year-old man, Officer Abts-Olsen checked his license and registration, and walked back to the Toyota, where he saw the driver portioning out a scoop of cocaine from a small glass vial.

When officer Abts-Olsen knocked on the driver’s car window, he apparently startled the man, leading him to spill cocaine all over his hands and the floor of his vehicle.

“Are you kidding?” Officer Abts-Olsen asked the man, who quickly tried to brush away the white powder. The man initially denied having any cocaine, though he admitted he had “vitamins” in his possession. Finally, the man relented, complimented Officer Abts-Olsen on his keen detection skills and admitted that snorting cocaine in the middle of a traffic stop was, perhaps, a poor decision. Officer Abts-Olsen also informed the man he had only intended to issue him a warning, due to his clean driving record, until the cocaine came out.

The head-shakingly bizarre encounter was captured on the patrol car’s in-car video system, and within a few days was turned into one of the best viral holiday “drive safely” spots that you will ever see.

Moral of this story? Don’t snort coke while a cop is running your license!

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Freedumb fried: Fox News gets ridiculed by the French

Barbie and Ken talk terrorism…

When Fox & Friends co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck recently interviewed Nolan Peterson, a former US Air Force pilot, on the Islamization of French society, the obviously extremely intelligent Mr. Peterson (not to be confused with Steven Emerson, the Fox News terrorism “expert” British Prime Minister charitably called a “complete idiot”) claimed that there were “741 no-go zones throughout France” under de facto Islamist control.

Not “700 plus” or “around 750” “no-go” zones, but exactly 741 “no-go” zones. Surely a dude this specific came armed with the knowledge to drop on the Fox New viewers. Peterson described Paris as “pretty scary,” comparing the City of Light to Afghanistan, Iraq and Kashmir and adding that he’s seen “young men wearing Osama Bin Laden t-shirts in a hookah shop.”

Sounds like something some old fart watching Fox News who has never been that far beyond the confines of his hometown would think is true, so… hey, why not? It’s not like it’s Elisabeth Hasselbeck’s job to know what he’s talking about, is it? She’s just supposed to nod with a furrowed brow, try to look serious and read from a teleprompter. She barely understands what she’s saying half the time, let alone the “experts” she interviews, so cut her some slack.

This is the face of a man who definitely knows what he’s talking about. You can tell by his smirk.
The segment is the quintessence of Fox News: False (i.e intellectually useless) information propagated by two people, one who has no idea what he’s talking about and a second who has no idea what he’s talking about either, producing together an incoherent news segment for an audience who has no idea if what they’re hearing is even true or not, but who accept it as true because it sounds like something they already believe.

When Yann Barthès, host of the French show Le Petit Journal saw the Fox News segment he sent his courageous producers, dressed in full combat gear to some of the 741 “no-go” zones to survey the situation with some pretty nonplussed man-on-the-street interviews.

Snopes investigated the claim of these supposed Islamist “no-go” zones only to find that the brain trust at Fox News mistranslated “zones urbaines sensibles” (ZUS), which is basically the equivalent French term for “urban renewal zones” and turned it into something it wasn’t…

Fox News vs. reality. Amusing yes, but ultimately it’s reality itself that ends up diminished…

Peterson apologized to the entire country of France for his smirky Fox News appearance in an open letter.

Via Daily Kos

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
An absolute must-see: the reasons people give for supporting Chick-fil-A

People turned out to support Chic-fil-A this week because of their principles and beliefs, that much should be obvious by now. Less obvious is just what those principles and beliefs are, exactly.

Well, here’s our chance to find out, thanks to YouTube uploader Liberalegg. She describes this video in her own words:

I ask people at Chick-fil-A some simple questions. At least… I thought they were simple enough, until they tried to answer.

In terms of the name calling, this video was not intended as hard-hitting journalism. It was just something funny for my friends, I never expected so many people to see it. I think the video would have been more effective had I allowed them to speak for themselves.

I apologize for the background noise; captions are available (just press the little cc button at the bottom right of the player).

Indeed, this video IS better with captions, as the sound is slightly off in parts. And also, because it means we get to hear and see the COMPLETE IDIOCY of the people involved in this “movement.”

There’s not much more to be said, as these people are saying it all themselves. Just sit back and have a good laugh:

Thanks to Darla Gayle and Honey Mahogany.

Posted by Niall O'Conghaile | Leave a comment
‘Book Burning Party’ fights Tea party idiocy with intellectual jujitsu

A 2004 Harry Potter book burning in Missouri

This Troy, Michigan civic brouhaha happened last November—I confess it was news to me—but it’s currently getting a second go ‘round via reddit/r/politics and Redditor ClydeStuff.

Absolutely worth watching, this “reverse psychology” propaganda tactic is GENIUS and could be successfully adapted to a number of different situations in other parts of this country, as you will see:

The city of Troy, Michigan was facing a budget shortfall, and was considering closing the Troy Public Library for lack of funds. Even though the necessary revenues could be raised through a miniscule tax increase, powerful anti-tax groups in the area were organized against it. A vote was scheduled amongst the city’s residents, to shut the library or accept the tax increase, and Leo Burnett Detroit decided to support the library by creating a reverse psychology campaign. Yard signs began appearing that read: “Vote to Close Troy Library on August 2nd - Book Burning Party on August 5th.” No one wants to be a part of a town that burns books, and the outraged citizens of Troy pushed back against the “idiotic book burners” and ultimately supported the tax increase, thus ensuring the library’s survival.

As someone who has toiled in the trenches of advertising and marketing myself, I genuflect to whoever thought this up. This is the kind of thing that can really cheer you up when you’re feeling down about living in an Idiocracy.

The creatives on this Swiftian tour de fource should be snapped up by the Democrats now and given extremely high-paying consultant gigs. And the Democrats should unleash them and fund them to do whatever it takes to deploy this stunt nationally and stay the fuck out of their way.

BRAVO! Standing ovation!

Troy, Michigan’s controversial mayor is Tea party favorite, Janice Daniels. You may dimly remember her as the dipshit who made national news last summer when an unintelligent, unfunny comment she made about gay marriage in New York on Facebook came back to haunt her. Then a few months after that she said she wanted an expert to testify that homosexuality is a mental illness at an anti-bullying educational forum for high school kids!

Dum-dum Daniels, who now faces a recall vote in November which she will surely lose, is also deeply unpopular for her vote against millions of dollars in federal funding to build a transit center near the Troy/Birmingham border that would have created hundreds of new jobs in the area and increased the town’s tax base.

Last week, reacting to news of the recall vote being called, Daniels, doubled down on the stupid by musing aloud that she felt homosexuality might be “dangerous”—like cigarettes!

Ignorance and ideology is a nasty combination.

Of course as soon as she is recalled, Fox News will probably race to sign-up Janice Daniels as a commentator on gay and lesbian issues! I mean hey, wouldn’t she be the perfect spokesperson for all those dimwitted Christian Americans who have had their First Amendment rights stomped on by TEH GAY AGENDA?!?!?

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Conservative conspiracy theory website backs ‘Ted Nugent for President’

Being on the mailing list for WorldNet Daily’s email blasts is a never ending source of amusement and material for this blog. This morning was no exception.

Predictably, the rabid WND wingnuts have rallied behind “America’s rock star” (and admitted draft dodger) Ted Nugent and have started a petition to “stand up” for the knuckle-dragging Neanderthal halfwit rocker:

Whereas, Nugent faces an investigation by the Secret Service for allegedly threatening the commander in chief even though he was only using metaphors to accentuate his irrefutable message: America is in deep trouble, and its citizens must act;

Whereas, he, nevertheless, has stood by his remarks and further condemned “power-abusing, corrupt monsters in our federal government that despise” him because he has the “audacity to speak the truth”;

Whereas, Nugent has brought attention to the gravity of this moment in American history by provocatively stating that if Obama remains in the White House he “will either be dead or in jail by this time next year”;

We, the undersigned, wholeheartedly stand behind Ted Nugent and urge all Americans to follow his example and use their own gifts, resources and unique platforms to help ensure that Barack Obama is not given the opportunity to destroy the world’s greatest nation.

Once you’ve signed the petition—I did, but under a rude name—you’ll have an opportunity to buy a “Ted Nugent for President” bumper sticker.

You have to hand it to WND, they may be fucking idiots, but they sure know how to sell crap to witless shitheads even dumber than they are. I’m not saying they’re “predatory capitalists,” just that they know their target audience.

Bless their pointed little heads…

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Pat Robertson: Demon Hunter

Pat Robertson on Feng Shui:

“You don’t wanna fool with that stuff. At best it’s demonic, at worst it’s just, it’s just superstition. Whatever it is. you don’t need it.”

Of course this is the same man who thinks strength in martial arts comes from “inhaling demon spirits.”

Tai chi is cool, though, sez Pat.

Via Joe.My.God.

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Idiocracy: Sarah Palin’s popularity, Tea Party, explained by Science
03:01 pm



Image by Versions Galore

David Dunning, a research psychologist at Cornell University, and his colleagues, have found how “incompetent” people are inherently unable to determine if another person is incompetent or not, or put more bluntly, some people are simply too dumb to know just how dumb they really are, and so they are, in turn, poor judges of stupidity (or intelligence) in others when they see it.

In one aspect of their study, the researchers asked students to grade some tests on grammar skills. While grading the tests, the ones who scored the worst themselves still didn’t recognize the correct answer even when they saw it repeatedly on their fellow students’ tests

If a joke sails over someone’s head—like the Zen koan about the tree falling in the forest when there is no one around to hear it—did the joke even exist in the first place???

Might this research begin to explain why our government is as lousy as it is when we have so many voters who don’t get the joke even after it’s been explained to them over and over and over again?

I think this speaks volumes about American politics. Via Life’s Little Mysteries:

With more than a decade’s worth of research, David Dunning, a psychologist at Cornell University, has demonstrated that humans find it “intrinsically difficult to get a sense of what we don’t know.” Whether an individual lacks competence in logical reasoning, emotional intelligence, humor or even chess abilities, the person still tends to rate his or her skills in that area as being above average.

Dunning and his colleague, Justin Kruger, formerly of Cornell and now at New York University, “have done a number of studies where we will give people a test of some area of knowledge like logical reasoning, knowledge about STDs and how to avoid them, emotional intelligence, etcetera. Then we determine their scores, and basically just ask them how well they think they’ve done,” Dunning said. “We ask, ‘what percentile will your performance fall in?’”

The results are uniform across all the knowledge domains: People who actually did well on the test tend to feel more confident about their performance than people who didn’t do well, but only slightly. Almost everyone thinks they did better than average. “For people at the bottom who are really doing badly — those in the bottom 10th or 15th percentile — they think their work falls in the 60th or 55th percentile, so, above average,” Dunning told Life’s Little Mysteries. The same pattern emerges in tests of people’s ability to rate the funniness of jokes, the correctness of grammar, or even their own performance in a game of chess. “People at the bottom still think they’re outperforming other people.”

It’s not merely optimism, but rather that their total lack of expertise renders them unable to recognize their deficiency. Even when Dunning and his colleagues offer study participants a $100 reward if they can rate themselves accurately, they cannot. “They’re really trying to be honest and impartial,” he said.

It poses an existential threat to the survival of American democracy itself when some large percentage of the United States electorate would be unable to recognize an actual expert on taxes, Wall Street regulation, global warming science or health care reform.

I mean, this kinda puts people like Louie Gohmert, Herman Cain, Michele Bachmann, and Allen West into perspective, doesn’t it? The people who would support them politically or vote for them, obviously lack the critical reasoning tools necessary to make a distinction between shit and shinola OR ELSE THEY WOULDN’T SUPPORT SUCH OBVIOUS DOLTS IN THE FIRST PLACE. We’ve always known this, of course, but now there’s a growing body of actual scientific evidence that might explain how such doofuses advance in American politics. “The Peter Principle,” with scientific underpinnings, if you will…

This is both chilling and funny in a “gallows humor” kind of way, isn’t it? In a 2008 follow-up study, Dunning, Kruger and their coauthors made attempts to test alternate explanations of the original hypothesis, but came largely to the same conclusions. In addition, they also found that in contrast to high performers, “poor performers do not learn from feedback suggesting a need to improve.”

Ouch, that is a strong statement! The last thing conservatives want to spend money on is public schools, and with a college education unaffordable and out of reach for many Americans, this is going to be a nearly intractable problem for decades to come.

More reading:
The Brutality Report: Stupid People What Don’t Know They’re Stupid (Vice)

Right-wingers are less intelligent than left wingers, says study (Daily Mail)

Below, Devo’s “Beautiful World”:

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Fox News FAIL: Everything You Know About The Payroll Tax Is Wrong

Looks like TPM cribbed a title from the Firesign Theatre (not that I’ve ever done such a thing!) with this ridiculous clip from the mixed-up, muddled-up, zany Bizarro World of Fox and Friends, where up is down, black is white, the sky is whatever color Roger Ailes tells them it is and where Republicans want to help the little guys…

Watch in stunned bemusement as these three tax experts shockingly ignorant people (plus wicked radio witch Laura Ingraham) tie themselves into Klein bottles as they crawl up their own assholes trying to explain why it’s really the Democrats’ fault that the Republicans want to raise taxes on the middle class—but not on billionaires, no way—to an audience comprised of people even dumber than they are!

And they still can’t do it.

Gretchen Carlson really outdoes herself here. And Laura Ingraham falsely claims that we live “in a country where 50% of Americans pay no tax at all.” This is a bold-faced lie and she knows it. Ingraham is slimy and she’s mean, but she’s not dumb (Politifact, where are you???).

There are classic Fox News moments and then there are classic Fox News moments... This pathetic example of amusingly amateur Orwellian doublespeak is a new low even for the three stooges on that couch. People who get their news from Fox fill their heads with shit and this is a good illustration of that in action, as plain as day.

For shits and giggles, share this one in advance with that Tea party-supporting uncle of yours who you’ll be seeing later this week. If the Democrats were smart—and they aren’t—they’d let this one play itself out over the holidays so Tea baggers can twist in the wind bragging about what the Republican congressmen and women they got into office in the last election cycle have achieved for the country. Nice fuckin’ work, gramps!

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
The Beatles as seen from the distant future
09:23 pm

Pop Culture


I find this totally plausible.
(via Scott Gairdner)

Posted by Brad Laner | Leave a comment