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Cthulhu Yoga: Goths embrace their dark side while staying fit
01.26.2015
11:09 am
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The New York Times style section is infamously incompetent at determining which trends are real and which trends are trolls. You’d think they’d have learned something after the infamous “grunge speak” hoax in which a Sub Pop Records receptionist convinced them that a bunch of silly gibberish was the latest in Generation X slang, but the incident didn’t stop them from reporting on normcore and monocles. At least the Health Goth trend has some organic roots. There is some debate as to whether weird sporty/satanic fashion hybrid was born on Tumblr or Facebook, and even more as to whether or not Health Goth even generally entails working out—the only thing we can be sure of is that sportswear and heavy black eyeliner are far less mutually exclusive than they used to be.

Let’s say you want to combine fitness and darkness, but don’t have access to a gym with Bauhaus-blasting cycling classes. Never fear, online tutorials already exist! “Yoga Fhtagn” (from “Cthulhu fhtagn,” meaning “Cthulhu waits”), and combines a Lovecraftian horror (is Lovecraft goth?) with low-impact Sun Salutation—minus the sun. The class of the damned is actually led and narrated by no other than feminist writer/journalist and and Harvard Fellow, Laurie Penny—so you know the politics of Health Goth are soundly left (and also that quite a few of the people that admire the style have a sense of humor about how silly it is).

Billed as “the ultimate health goth workout,” Penny’s says her routine will help us “tone our bodies, while slowly losing our minds,” but the video cuts mysteriously short, most likely owing to cosmic monstrosities. Hey, no pain, no gain.
 

Posted by Amber Frost
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01.26.2015
11:09 am
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