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‘The Book of Mormon Missionary Positions’ is the one gay sex manual that is TOTALLY SAFE FOR WORK
11.09.2015
01:57 pm
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The Mormon Church’s law of chastity prohibits masturbation and premarital sex. The Church even frowns on dressing in a non-chaste manner and—no surprise here—homosexuality is considered a major-league sin, a big “no no” to our friends the Latter-Day Saints.

Inspired by Mitt Romney’s run for the US Presidency, Portland-based photographer Neil Dacosta satirized the Mormons’ politicized stance on same-sex relations by coming up with The Book of Mormon Missionary Positions. Think of it as a chaste gay Mormon version of the Kama Sutra sex manual. Like most Mormon-related things, it’s still totally safe for work. These Mormon twinks don’t even get their ironed and pressed missionary kits off as they attempt to go beyond the missionary position.

I wanted to see some magic underwear action, but sadly, none was forthcoming.


 

 

 
More after the jump…
 

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Posted by Tara McGinley
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11.09.2015
01:57 pm
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The Second Coming: Mitt flips out when asked about the whole ‘Jesus in Missouri’ thing
11.02.2012
03:47 pm
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If you haven’t seen the clip of Mitt Romney getting into a heated discussion with the conservative talk radio guy (Jan Mikelson of WHO-Iowa) who dared to ask him about the whole Jesus will rule the Earth from Missouri belief of Mormonism, give it a whirl.

The guy is TOTALLY on his side, and explicitly tells him so, but Romney will have NONE of it! Hilarity ensues. Then in the final minute you get to hear exactly how he’s going to deal with a woman’s right to choose.
 

Posted by Richard Metzger
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11.02.2012
03:47 pm
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Mitt Romney: The Mormon ‘Chosen One’?
10.22.2012
02:43 pm
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In a decidedly impolite press release that came across ChristianNewsWire this morning, Bill Keller, the self-proclaimed “world’s leading Internet Evangelist” (2.4 million subscribers receive his Daily Devotional email) took no prisoners as he expounded on “Mitt Romney’s Great Lie the Media and Christians are Ignoring”:

Up front, this is in no way an endorsement for President Obama since I don’t tell people who to or not to vote for. I was one of the first in the media in 2007 to warn people who then, Senator Obama was, and shared that if he was elected President in 2008 it would be a form of God’s judgment on this nation for our sins. According to the Book of James, Chapter 4 Verse 4, President Obama is an enemy of God in every sense of the word. As I warned and has come to pass, he has been the most pro abortion, pro homosexual, pro enemy of Israel President in history. President Obama opposes God on every major spiritual issue of the day.

This is also not about politics. This is about spiritual issues, which are the real problems our nation faces. Mitt Romney and those in his cult like Glenn Back, LIE every time they call themselves Christian. Mormon doctrine is clearly 100% inconsistent with Biblical Christianity. While they claim they are Christians because the name of their cult is The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, that doesn’t make them Christians any more than if they called themselves giraffes would make them giraffes!

Mitt Romney, and all Mormon men believe that if they follow the beliefs of their cult during this life, upon death they will become the “god” of their own planet. That is why when Romney and Mormons speak of “god,” it is NOT the God of the Bible Christians believe in, but a “god” who was once a man and ascended to become “god” of this planet.

Mitt Romney and those in his cult talk about having faith in Jesus, but the “jesus” they believe in is NOT a deity as the Bible teaches. Their jesus is also the brother of Lucifer who will return one day to Independence, Missouri, instead of the Mt. of Olives as the Bible teaches. As for true Biblical Christians, Romney and those in their cult believe that they are lost and inferior.

In regards to the Bible, those in the Mormon cult supersede God’s Word which true Christians believe represents Absolute Truth and cannot be added or taken away from, with the writings of their cult’s documented con artist, pedophile, polygamist, racist, and murdering founder Joseph Smith. Those writings include The Book of Mormon, The Pearl of Great Price, and the Doctrines and Covenants. These writings and NOT the Bible that they believe is flawed, form the authority Mormons put their faith in.

Regarding women, Romney and those in the Mormon cult believe like Muslims, that women are inferior to men. Mormon women have ZERO spiritual authority. As a matter of fact, an 11 year-old male in the Mormon cult has more spiritual authority than a mature woman. Mitt Romney and men in the Mormon cult have a special name for their wife/wives that only the two of them know. That is because upon death, a Mormon woman can only get into the Mormon version of heaven by their husband calling them by that special name.

Once in their version of heaven, a woman will be one of many wives since Mormons still believe in polygamy, even though most have abandoned the practice to become more acceptable by the culture. In the Mormon version of the afterlife, women will all be eternal incubators, creating “spirit babies” that Mormons believe will populate their “planet” that they have been given to rule as “god.”

The reason the media can’t figure out why Mitt Romney seems like someone living in the ‘50s, why he seems a bit “off,” is because they don’t understand the beliefs that guides Romney and those in their cult. Since his college days at BYU, Romney was called by close friends “the chosen one.” This is a reference to the White Horse Prophecy he and all Mormons believe in, that says the nation will be in a state of chaos. During that time of chaos, they believe a Mormon will be elected President, set aside the Constitution, and enact a Mormon theocracy.

Of course, if you challenge a Mormon about their beliefs, they will LIE that this is not what they believe. In Mormonism, it is called “lying for the Lord,” which teaches them that it is OK to lie about their true beliefs in order to advance the agenda of their cult. This is why when asked about their secretive “temple rituals” their founder Smith plagiarized from the Masonic cult, Mormons will tell you they are sacred and not secret, to keep people from knowing about their blood oaths to the Mormon cult above everything else, or the role playing that includes worshipping Satan.

Mitt Romney, Glenn Beck, and those in the Mormon cult LIE every time they claim to be a Christian. The fact is, because of their beliefs that they will deny if confronted with them, a Mormon is no more a Christian than a Muslim is. Why won’t the media challenge Mitt Romney on this issue? Worse, why do true Biblical Christians allow him and those in his cult to get away with such a LIE???

Uh… wowsers. Keller, who asks Christians to send him their gold jewelry so that he can convert it into “souls,” plans to sue the Southern Poverty Law Center for $100 million for listing his LivePrayer ministry as an anti-gay and anti-Muslim hate group. I don’t think Bill Keller likes Mormons much either.

There’s more on the the Voting for Jesus website, where as of today 1,349,606 people have made a pledge to Keller to write in “Jesus” on Election Day:

‘Christians must take a stand and say ‘NO’ to Satan this November”:

If Mitt Romney is elected, he will be the fulfillment of his cult’s polygamist, pedophile, racist, con artist, murdering founder Joseph Smith’s “White Horse” prophecy that Romney and all Mormon’s believe. That prophecy says that the United States will facing great economic and social unrest, a Mormon will be elected President, declare a national emergency and set aside the US Constitution and enact a Mormon theocracy. That may sound impossible, but ever since he was at BYU, Romney was called by his inner circle “the chosen one” to fulfill their cult’s prophecy.

Aside from the ‘White Horse” prophecy, Romney’s cult is very aggressive in seeking converts to their beliefs. They have been preparing for the past year for a Romney Presidency, and conservative estimates are that over 1 million people in this country alone will become part of his cult without him having to ever say a word. Just by being the President, his cult will finally gain the mainstream acceptance they have never been able to attain. For Christians, that means 1 million plus people will buy into the lies of Romney’s cult, die, and their souls burn in hell for all eternity! How can a true follower of Christ vote in good conscience for a man whose cult will help send 1 million plus souls to hell?

Sadly, most Christians are so appalled at President Obama’s opposition to God on every major spiritual issue of the day, they are willing to put politics above souls. The justification is that Romney is the lesser of two evils. My friend, the lesser of two evils is still EVIL!

Via Joe.My.God

Posted by Richard Metzger
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10.22.2012
02:43 pm
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Sinister, spooky or goofy: Never-before-seen footage of secret Mormon Temple rituals!
10.21.2012
07:59 pm
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According to Andrew Jackson,  author of The Mormon Faith of Mitt Romney: What Latter-day Saints Teach and Practice, the Romney family’s roots are as deep as they go in the history of the Mormon religion. The Romneys have been a leading presence within The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints since the days of Joseph Smith himself.

Romney’s great-great-grandparents were first generation Mormons. His great-great-grandfather Miles Romney converted to the faith in its first decade, and another great-great-grandfather, Parley P. Pratt, was an early LDS leader. Back in the days when Mormonism was still considered to be a freaky polygamy cult. Mormonism, you might say, was the Scientology of the 19th century. It’s not that their beliefs have really changed much over the intervening centuries—or that most non-Mormons even know what they believe—it’s just that there are so many of them today. All religions start off as cults, obviously and Mitt Romney, fifth generation Mormon, comes from a genetic line of true believers.

Very, very little has been said regarding Mormonism during the 2012 election cycle. I’m surprised that neither Romney’s GOP primary opponents nor the Obama campaign, took the matter on, but who wants to be accused of religious bigotry (and who didn’t want to be reminded of the Rev. Jeremiah Wright over and over again)?

But why aren’t any of the Democrat-leaning SuperPacs taking on the weirdo beliefs of Mitt Romney’s religion? Mormons believe in some crazy shit, let’s face it. I’m worried enough when conservative Christians get into elected office, so I can’t say I’m any more thrilled about the prospect of the Mormon equivalent of a Mayflower descendant getting within hailing distance of the White House, for Kolob’s sake!

This video was posted on YouTube with the following description:

Mormon temple ceremonies are a closely held secret. Until now.

For the first time in the 170+ year history of secret Mormon temple activity, those activities have been captured on film with a hidden camera.

Watch with your own eyes the sworn oath, known as the “Law of Consecration,” that US Presidential candidate Mitt Romney has raised his arm to the square and vowed to obey, an oath that requires faithful Mormons to consecrate 100% of their current AND FUTURE time, talents and everything they will ever be blessed with, to the Mormon church and it’s goal to achieve a worldwide theocracy headed by Mormons.

I think at least one member of the mainstream media might want to ask Mitt Romney—before the election—if he’s ever made the pledge to accept the “Law of Consecration.” Actually, not if, but how many times?

Click here to see the full Mormon temple Endowment ceremony video.
 

 
Via Joe.My.God

Posted by Richard Metzger
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10.21.2012
07:59 pm
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Richard Dawkins trolls Mitt Romney on Twitter
08.08.2012
02:17 pm
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Posted by Richard Metzger
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08.08.2012
02:17 pm
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The Mormon Meme, plus the Mitt Romney documentary you won’t see on American television
07.30.2012
04:52 pm
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Considering how negative the presidential campaign has already become this year—going back to the GOP primary when Newt Gingrich landed a hell of a blow to Mitt Romney’s glass jaw with that hilarious and skull-fucking “When Mitt Romney Came to Town” film—it’s surprising to me that the “800lb Mormon elephant in the room” hasn’t become more front and center by now. I’d have thought that shoe would have already dropped.

I’m sure that Democrats would love to be able to paint Romney’s kooky faith as a 19th century Scientology—if the shoe fits, wear it!—but so far they don’t seem to have the stomach for what would be considered a low blow and gutter politics. You could argue that fair’s fair and that the GOP has spent the last four years zealously and feverishly painting Obama as a Muslim Communist from Kenya and as “the other,” but hey, that’s just Democrats for you.

No matter, someone’s going to do it for them, anyways and the Internet seems to be revving up for it, too. It’s a matter of days, probably, and not weeks, before all manner of Mormon memes start making their way all across the Internet. I kept waiting and watching for that moment to happen, but I think it can be said with assurance that it’s on the way, or underway already. The rumblings are there, let’s just say.

How long will it take before “#WhatMormonsBelieve” becomes a trending topic on Twitter or this video ends up on the reddit homepage with this title: “ENDLESS. CELESTIAL. SEX. What Mormons believe!”?

Not long, I’d wager.

To the majority of Americans, let’s face it, the Mormon belief system is a little hard to swallow. Nutty sounding? Yeah, that, too! And it’s not that I don’t find all religions suspect, it’s just that we don’t have actual legal records of Jesus or Mohamed being arrested for being con men, unlike Mormon founder prophet Joseph Smith. The average American doesn’t have that clear of an idea of what Mormonism is all about—-“clean cut white people, like the Osmonds; they have a big choir in like a tabernacle or someplace real big”—would seem to sum it up adequately for those of us who have never stepped foot in Utah—but if they did, of course, it would blow their everlovin’ minds.

Why hasn’t a journalist laid a rhetorical trap for Mitt Romney asking him first to say, politely affirm the seriousness of his faith. Check. Then lobbing him an innocuous question about the Book of Mormon and would reading it be of benefit to Christians maybe? Wait for the answer and then go in for the fucking kill, innocently asking Romney “Oh, yeah, can you explain to me that stuff in the Book of Mormon about the differences between black people and white people, because I didn’t really understand that bit? And what would the Book of Mormon have to say about someone of mixed race heritage, like President Obama, for instance? That whole Lamanite/Nephite thing he’s got going on. Does he truly understand Nephite culture, do you think, Governor Romney?”

It would be so easy to ask this, or a wide variety of similar enough “Mormon gotcha questions.” Cue another deer in the headlights moment for Mittens

Cue many!

(And did you see the footage of him reacting to the “Wimp Factor” Newsweek cover over the weekend? PRICELESS!).
 
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Below, BBC documentary The Mormon Candidate. No one would say this is a balanced view of Mormons, but it sure is fascinating.
 

 
After the jump, What Mormons Believe...

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Posted by Richard Metzger
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07.30.2012
04:52 pm
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