“Safety Woman” from the school safety video “Safety: In Danger out of Doors” from 1978.
 
This late 70s school safety video is full of so much weirdness that it’s hard not to feel like you’re suddenly having an unplanned acid trip while watching it.

In this short film from 1978 menacingly entitled Safety: In Danger out of Doors, we meet the fictional character Miss Karen Kingsley, who the narrator describes as “a youthful, gifted, attractive, successful, freelance architect” who spends her free time volunteering as a school crossing guard. The fourteen-minute PSA plays out much like a lost B-movie when the multi-talented Miss Kingsley somehow becomes “Safety Woman,” a shiny-jumpsuit-wearing superhero (who came to be thanks to some sort of sketchy divine alien “interaction”), that shows up just in time to save her accident prone school-age pals from certain death. If this video had been made in the 80s, that jumpsuit would have reeked of Enjoli perfume for sure. Check out all the possible scenarios that put children of the 70s in peril, like skateboarding or swimming—which we (or at least most of us, I suppose) somehow miraculously survived—after the jump…