A photo floated across my desk yesterday of a costume being sold by national chain party-supply store, Party City, which is a generic gothic rocker outfit.

What was remarkable about this typically lame attempt at subculture commodification for normies to play dress-up-like-a-weirdo for Halloween, is the fact that they went all deep-cuts for the title on the package.
 

 
“Romeo’s Distress” is the eighth track on Christian Death’s seminal 1982 death-rock masterpiece Only Theatre of Pain. Personally, I consider “Romeo’s Distress” the best song on the best goth album of all time. Your mileage may vary. Still, I’m impressed that some designer working for this particular costume company went there with the authenticity in the titling, even if pre-packaged Halloween costumes always look somewhat LESS than authentic.
 

 
With Halloween over, these things are bound to be on sale, right? Find one on discount now and plan ahead for your next occasion warranting a fake goth look. Be sure to pick up some clove cigarettes to complete the ensemble.
 
Here’s the real deal. Rozz Williams and Christian Death performing “Romeo’s Distress” live:

Previously on Dangerous Minds:
‘80s ‘sicko, freako’ goth band hilariously hardtrolls this kooky conservative TV host
Propaganda: The aesthetics of evil and why GOTH was a thing that had to happen