The perfect gift for mother
Anyone who’s spent any time in America is familiar with the phenomenon of the elevation of Brian De Palma’s 1983 cokehead tour de force Scarface as a singular icon of worldly American success. Unsurprisingly, Martin Scorsese’s enervating masterpiece Wolf of Wall Street starring Leonardo DiCaprio seems headed down the same road, of a morality tale whose relevant audience seems to have missed the point entirely.
I couldn’t tell you a single thing about financial operations of the real-life Jordan Belfort, but I do know that the man made a lot of money on Wall Street, did a lot of drugs and had a lot of sex, and then was busted by the feds for being a scumbag or something. Scorsese’s Wolf of Wall Street is the blackest of black comedies mainly due to its willingness to wallow in its protagonist’s point of view at such length. There’s an extended sequence towards the end of the movie that ranks up there as one of the core reasons I cherish the cinema as an art form, and if you’ve seen the movie you can probably identify the one I mean.
In any case, Leonardo DiCaprio, in addition to being a talented actor, is also famous for hanging out on yachts, which somewhat blunts the brilliance of his portrayal of Jordan Belfort. Stupid people everywhere appear to have seized on DiCaprio’s Belfort as a hero worth emulating, much as Martin Scorsese might have a different opinion on the subject.
Case in point. Right now on Amazon several canvas prints of DiCaprio-as-Belfort for use as “wall art” are available. All of them come in two sizes but if you’re the Belfort fan I think you are, you don’t want the small size, you want the full 44”x26” Big Kahuna, which will run you $124.99. There’s one of Belfort snorting cocaine off of a woman’s ass, that one’s my favorite. There’s another one of Belfort cavorting on the floor with his scantily clad mistress-then-wife Naomi Lapaglia (Margot Robbie) which covers similar terrain as the cocaine-ass one.
All of these can be shipped in time for Christmas, by the way.
There are a few others, including one of Belfort holding a glass of wine on a yacht that I think has extra resonance due to DiCaprio’s own hobbies, that you can see below. I wish they had thought to include a still of the early scene where Belfort is mentored by a senior trader named Mark Hanna (Matthew McConaughey) in the art of rapidly getting hammered during the luncheon hour. Hanna is given one of the movie’s more memorable lines when he says that the secret to success on Wall Street can be boiled down to “cocaine and hookers, my friend.”
Keeping on the subject of cocaine, in addition to the Wolf of Wall Street canvas prints I’ve thrown in one of Wagner Moura playing Pablo Escobar in the Netflix series Narcos and another one of David Bowie as Jareth in Labyrinth.
Naomi Lapaglia goodness
Sexy money armor
Leo on a yacht
This man has good values
Party time on Wall Street
David Bowie as Jareth
via Siobhan Thompson
Previously on Dangerous Minds:
Ridiculous celebrity ‘wall art’ we urge you not to put in your home