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‘Oh my aching oyster slot!’: Play ‘Heavenly Hamhouse’ the kinky role-playing board game
03.23.2016
11:21 am
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‘Oh my aching oyster slot!’: Play ‘Heavenly Hamhouse’ the kinky role-playing board game

The cover of the 1994 board game
The cover of the 1994 board game “Heavenly Hamhouse: The Safe-Sex Virtual-Reality Role-Playing Game.” Illustrations and concept by Lloyd Dangle.
 
If the illustrations for this 1994 board game designed by Lloyd Dangle called “Heavenly Hamhouse” (a game of “safe-sex, virtual-reality and role-playing) look familiar to you, it’s probably because you see the same artist’s work on the packaging for the popular “nutritional suppliment” Airborne. Dangle, who once worked as a cartoonist for the Michigan Voice under the publications’ editor, the-soon-to-be-famous filmmaker Michael Moore, also penned the staunchly liberal-minded syndicated comic Troubletown which ran for twenty-two years in various publications across the country. But my recent discovery that Dangle was the creator and designer of this “anything goes”-style board game where players get to perform acts of fetish and kink upon each other—“guaranteed to annoy the hell out of Christians!”—was a new one on me.
 
Heavenly Hamhouse silk-screened game board and
Heavenly Hamhouse silk-screened game board and “action-fetish spinner.”
 
The rules of game play for
The rules of game play for “Heavenly Hamhouse” and game pieces/markers.
 
The bottom of the
The bottom of the “Heavenly Hamhouse” game box.
 
A pervy insert for the board game
A naughty insert for the board game “Heavenly Hamhouse.”
 
Less than 100 of the bawdy “Heavenly Hamhouse” games were ever produced and apparently the game board itself was silk-screened, making it a very cool collectible. According to the “rules” players spin the “action-fetish spinner” and “bounce from one steamy situation to the next.” Such as landing on a game square that tells you to start “grabbing your privates (noted as “xxxx” on the game board) the “European way,” or “obediently satisfying each player’s seediest “xxxx” fantasy.” Because playing a board game that has the potential to lead to a full-on orgy with some of your closest pals, really is the very definition of a great Saturday night.

It should also be noted that according to the game rules, prior to game play the room must be cleared of children, bible-thumpers and anyone from Florida. After a quick search on the Internet, I did find one copy of the game out there for sale for cheap if you need to get your hands on one so you can finally get your hands all over your best friend’s wife without getting in trouble. It’s just a game after all.
 
H/T: Board Game Geek

Posted by Cherrybomb
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03.23.2016
11:21 am
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