United Airlanes is a fake Twitter account representing a fake airline with whimsical, silly, satirical tweets mocking the traditional customer service responses you expect from businesses. Especially ones that suck as much as airlines.
No one is exactly sure who started the @UnitedAirlanes account on Twitter in May 2012, but it seems to be @LeonsBuddyDave from Tumblr.
Whoever you are, I love you.
Some people think they are tweeting the real United Airlines, usually to complain about something. They must have missed the tweets about offering Sky Indulgence points that you can redeem during the Cloud Rapture. Or the tagline that says: “Airplanes are just magic we don’t understand yet.” Or, you know, the (parody) after it.
LeonsBuddyDave posted on Tumblr last week:
“Found out last night that for months, angry customers have been tweeting at my fake parody airline account, United Airlanes, to bitch about their experiences with United Airlines. God has given me a great, beautiful funnel through which angry people flow in the worst possible mood.”
He continued about the possibility of getting into trouble with United:
The most they could really do is make a case to Twitter that my account is either intentionally masquerading as them (or making no attempt to clarify it) and get the account shut down. On the other hand, they might appreciate that I’ve become a lightning rod for hate targeted at them - every tweet @united sends out gets unbelievable vitriol in return.
I just hope they send me a physical Cease and Desist letter I can hang on my wall.
Yesterday he tweeted:
This is your captain reminding you to fasten your seat belts;we may experience some mild turbulence as we surf this sweet tornado hell yeah
— United Airlanes (@unitedairlanes) August 6, 2013
Other examples:
Though oxygen is flowing, the bag may not inflate. If it does, you are inhaling millions of Micro-Spiders and suffocation is now a blessing.
— United Airlanes (@unitedairlanes) August 2, 2013
At United Airlanes, pilots carry less than $20 in cash
— United Airlanes (@unitedairlanes) July 31, 2013
.@stepharoozoo United Airlanes reminds you that DVDs are as sharp as they are archaic, and that cutting tools will be valuable on the island
— United Airlanes (@unitedairlanes) July 31, 2013
@BruPayne @JetBlue No, it's a very serious warning. We accidentally hired bounty hunters to run that desk and now we can't stop them.
— United Airlanes (@unitedairlanes) July 31, 2013
. @iMattThrasher On top of that, there was NOTHING good in your luggage. Who the hell still uses a Zune?
— United Airlanes (@unitedairlanes) August 1, 2013