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Freddy Krueger commands you to dance (or else!) on his 1987 novelty record
10.26.2017
07:28 am
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What would be really surprising, in retrospect, is if there had been no Freddy Krueger novelty records at all. But most of us will do much worse things for money. Aside from the Fat Boys’ “rappin’ Freddy” single, “Are You Ready for Freddy,” the big item in the child killer’s slender discography is the 1987 LP Freddy’s Greatest Hits, credited to the Elm Street Group.

The title is misleading, and not just because there weren’t any hits. Freddy’s only contribution to many songs is a joyless cackle that sounds like the devil’s laughter in Chick tracts (“HAW! HAW! HAW!”). The actual lead vocals, usually performed by one Stephanie Davy, emerge from a band that sounds like it has run out of drugs midway through scoring a contemporary Chevy Chase vehicle. Does Freddy get the chance to stretch out, to demonstrate his range, his imagination, or his gifts as an interpreter of songs? Did Freddy and the Elm Street Group keep after, say, “Moon River” all night long, through take after nicotine-stained take, until the song finally opened up like a thousand-petaled lotus long after everyone had grown too tired to think, and a hush fell over the studio as the sun stole over the horizon and the last notes died away because everyone knew they had just played “the one,” the take for all time, and they could still feel it hanging in the air? No. On his recording debut, Freddy mostly says “HAW! HAW! HAW!”
 

 
What can this flawed collection tell us about the artist? Freddy is a Boomer, apparently. Four of the nine tracks are covers of Fifties and Sixties rock hits: Freddie and the Dreamers’ “Do the Freddie,” Sam the Sham & the Pharaohs’ “Wooly Bully,” Wilson Pickett’s “In the Midnight Hour” and the Everly Brothers’ “All I Have to Do Is Dream.” While the latter two selections are obvious enough jokes, the inclusion of “Do the Freddie” and “Wooly Bully” reveals a surprising dimension of Freddy’s character. He wants you to dance!

More Freddy after the jump…

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Posted by Oliver Hall
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10.26.2017
07:28 am
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Unintentionally hilarious horror movie-themed anti-smoking PSA


 
This short anti-smoking PSA produced by Enniscorthy Youthreach in conjunction with the Irish Cancer Society has its heart in the right place even if the results are unintentionally hilarious.

The two-minute spot on the terrors of peer-pressure features homages to famous horror villains, including Jack Torrence (“I’ll huff and I’ll puff… MAINLY PUFF”), a Freddy Krueger with cigarette fingers instead of knives, Jason Voorhees, Michael Myers, Ghostface, Chucky, Hannibal Lecter, and a Reagan McNeil who, in the best scene of the video, vomits a whole carton’s worth of cigs at the protagonist. 

In the end, we find that this was all the hospital-bed nightmare of someone ostensibly dying of lung cancer.

The storyline, acting, makeup, and special effects are all gloriously no-budget and awesomely terrible, making this, perhaps, the most entertaining anti-smoking PSA of all recorded time.

Watch it after the jump…

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Posted by Christopher Bickel
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08.25.2017
08:45 am
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Before he was ‘Freddy Krueger’ actor Robert Englund was a surfer & super hunk
05.30.2017
01:18 pm
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A photo of a young Robert Englund aka “Freddy Krueger” from the ‘A Nightmare on Elm Street’ film series giving Paul Newman a run for his money sometime in the early 1970s.
 
You may not always agree with everything I write about here on DM but one thing is for sure—actor Robert Englund was a super-fit surfer/actor back in the in the 1970s who appeared in films alongside Jeff Bridges, Charles Bronson, Richard Gere, Sally Field, and Henry Fonda. Now let that sink in for a few minutes before you say the words “no fucking way.” 

It’s actually pretty easy to express disbelief about this revelation. Mostly because Englund—an experienced and classicly trained actor—spent so much time in front of the camera in heavy makeup and prosthetics as “Freddy Krueger.” Englund was only 37 when he took on the iconic character in 1984’s A Nightmare on Elm Street, and he was still quite the looker when he embarked on the career-defining role that would make him a massive star. But most people don’t really think about that kind of thing when it comes to Robert Englund because for nearly twenty years he spent most of his time looking like his face was melting off while slicing up sleep-deprived teenagers on the big screen. However, during his days doing theater in the 60s, and the films he appeared in during the 1970s, we got to see a much different version of Englund, sometimes shirtless and gorgeously brooding in early publicity stills where he looks remarkably like a young version of the late Layne Staley of Alice in Chains. Once I got to digging around for images of Englund in his younger days, I couldn’t stop because the more I searched, the more I found and the more fascinated I became with Englund’s pre-Freddy Krueger life.
 

Robert Englund or Layne Staley of Seattle band Alice in Chains? It’s hard to tell but this is, in fact, one of Robert Englund’s head shots taken during his regional theater days in the late 1960s.
 
Englund honed his acting chops doing regional theater around California as a child, something he continued to pursue all through high school. After three years as a student at UCLA, he left California to study at the Meadow Brook Theater in Michigan where he would perform in classic stage productions written by Shakespeare and Irish playwright George Bernard Shaw. In 1974 Englund would appear in his first big Hollywood role in the film Buster and Billie with actor Jan-Michael Vincent. A few years later and with nine films already under his belt, Englund would audition for the role of “Lance B. Johnson,” the reluctant soldier and LSD-dropping surfer in Apocalypse Now. According to Englund, who was born in 1947, he was told that he was “too old” for the role and the casting crew sent him across the hall to read for the role of Han Solo in Star Wars where he was told he was “too young looking.” Englund headed home and after drinking a bunch of beer he got in touch with his friend Mark Hamill and ended up being one of a few of Hamill’s young actor friends who suggested that he go try out for the park of Luke Skywalker. The rest is history as they say. Englund has done more than his fair share of films (almost 50) and it is that kind of rigor that helps separate the wolves from the pack in this game.

Full disclosure: I’m an unabashed fan of Englund’s, and bonafide horror film junkie to the core and this discovery was sort of like winning the horror-nerd lottery for me. I mean, the images of Englund, a native of Glendale, California, waiting for a wave along with fellow surfer and screenwriter Dennis Aaberg during some downtime on location for the 1978 film Big Wednesday (which is fantastic in case you’ve never seen it) is everything. As are images of Englund from his appearance in director Tobe Hooper’s 1976 film Eaten Alive (which is also pretty great), where he plays a womanizing lothario named “Buck” with a tanned, chiseled physique. Zowie. If all this sounds awesome and unbelievable to you then I’m sure you’re going to enjoy this unexpected trip down memory lane by way of Elm Street.
 

Englund (pictured first in this photo with the baseball hat on) headed out to catch some waves during a break in shooting the film ‘Big Wednesday’ in 1978.
 

FREDDY CAN SURF!
 
More after the jump…

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Posted by Cherrybomb
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05.30.2017
01:18 pm
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Your favorite horror villains… playing with kittens!
11.12.2015
07:51 am
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Leatherface with sweet kitten friends. R.I.P. Gunnar Hansen.
 
While conventional Internet wisdom via “rule 34” suggests that “if it exists there’s porn of it,” the Internet is so much more sophisticated today: if it exists, there’s a high probability that there’s cutesy fan art of it. Such is the case with Kat Philbin’s precious renditions of famous horror icons playing with kittens.
 

 
Philbin’s illustrations, available through her Etsy shop, depict such classic villains as Jason Voorhees, Freddy Krueger, Michael Myers, Leatherface, Pinhead, Hannibal Lechter, and the Alien Queen being “attacked” by sweet, delightful kitties. The cynical horror purist in me wants to hate this… but how could I? These prints are absolutely adorable.


 

 

 
More horror greats and their kitties, after the jump…

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Posted by Christopher Bickel
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11.12.2015
07:51 am
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Your favorite movie villains are now IKEA instruction manuals
09.28.2015
09:26 am
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Artist Ed Harrington has scores of horror and pop-culture-themed illustrations on his website, Instagram, and Tumblr pages, most displaying his keenly sick sense of humor.

I really love the guy’s work, but my favorite pieces come from a series of IKEA instruction manual-style renderings of infamous movie villains.

I’m not totally sure what IKEA instruction graphics have to do with horror icons, but if you’ve ever have to cobble together a piece of furniture using one of their assembly diagrams, you know there is definitely a sense of dread attached. A bag full of hex bolts is as real-world horror as it gets.

Each of the pictographs assigns a bullshit Ikea product-esque faux-Swedish name to its subject: Jason Voorhees becomes “Vörhees” and Freddy Krueger becomes “Krugr.” The “Krugr” piece is a gem: the step-by-step icons illustrate the famous jump-rope chant from the A Nightmare on Elm Street movies (“One, two, Freddy’s comin’ for you. Three, four, better lock your door…”) Brilliant.
 

 
Anyway, these illustrations are the bomb dot com. Check Harrington’s website for more fun stuff.
 

 
More after the jump…

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Posted by Christopher Bickel
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09.28.2015
09:26 am
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Sexy fantasy pin-ups of Jason, Freddy, and Michael Myers
09.10.2015
09:17 am
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Jason Voorhees, Freddy Kreuger, and Michael Myers: the three most popular horror icons of the past 40 years… now homoerotic super-hunks thanks to British artist Karl Von Frankenstein.
 

 
These portraits are so wrong and so, so right.
 

 
Beyond mere erotic art, these lowbrow images conjure a stylistic bouillabaisse of Ghanaian movie posters, Tom of Finland heroes, and tacky ‘80s Miami trash colors. 
 

 
Karl Von Frankenstein’s Facebook page has more of his work, but only his Jason, Freddy, Michael Myers, and Street Trash pieces fit this sexy beefcake style. Here’s hoping we see a lot more of this in the future—Pinhead, Leatherface, and Jigsaw are begging for this treatment.
 

 

Posted by Christopher Bickel
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09.10.2015
09:17 am
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‘Nightmare Feddy,’ ‘Anna Montana’ and other Chinese import toy knock-off fails
07.29.2015
11:21 am
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Photo via i-mockery.com
 
Several years ago I first became aware of “Nightmare Feddy,” a Chinese bootleg doll of Freddy Krueger from the popular A Nightmare on Elm Street horror franchise, and I’ve been laughing about him ever since. I’m not sure what it is specifically about the name “Nightmare Feddy” that I find so funny, but its one of those things that pops into my head from time to time and I just kind of start laughing to myself over it. “Nightmare Feddy.” It’s just so stupid.
 

Photo via i-mockery.com
 
Apparently I’m not the only person obsessed with “Feddy.” I’m no toy collector, but I’ve wanted one of these Chinese failure figures for years now—I’ve kept my eyes peeled for one in the wild, to no avail. They turn up regularly on eBay,  usually priced between $40 to $80. Yeah, I want this dumb conversation piece, but not forty bucks worth.

But still, just look at this stupid thing. Look at its shoes!
 

Photo via i-mockery.com
 
“Nightmare Feddy” might be a scarce, improbable collector’s item, but a trip to your local Dollar Tree will undoubtedly reveal shelves upon shelves of strangely-titled knock-off toys which are good for similar ESL laughs.

Here’s a treasury of Chinese toy knock-off fails:
 

Feddy’s cousin: “Monster”
 

“Spook Chasers”
 

“Anna Montana”
 
More Chinese toy fails after the jump…

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Posted by Christopher Bickel
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07.29.2015
11:21 am
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La Cage a Freddy: Homo Nightmare on Elm Street 2
06.22.2010
12:15 am
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image
 
Examining the (apparently?) inadvertent lavender subtext of Nightmare on Elm Street 2. From the documentary Never Sleep Again: The Elm Street Legacy.

Who knew?
 
Via Popnography. Thank you Rupert Russell!
 

 

 

Posted by Richard Metzger
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06.22.2010
12:15 am
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