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Henry VIII’s bizarre and grotesque ‘Horned Helmet’
02.07.2018
10:02 am
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Henry VIII’s grotesque Horned Helmet might sound uncannily like a saucy euphemism for the royal fat bastard’s wing-wang but it is, unsurprisingly, a rather fitting description for a genuine piece of kingly armor presented to HRH by Maximilian I, the Holy Roman Emperor in 1514.

This grotesque yet intricately crafted helmet was given as a present after ye olde King Henry had assisted Maximilian in holding back/defeating the French at the Battle of Spurs in 1513. The helmet was designed by Konrad Seusenhofer, the Austrian armorer who worked for the Emperor. It was made from copper alloy and was originally gilded. The helmet is all that remains of the original suit of armor gifted by Maximillian—the rest of the suit is believed to have been recycled or rather thrown out as scrap metal.

Henry’s Horned Helmet features a beautifully crafted face of a rather ugly fool complete with a set of spectacles. The face is finely detailed with crow’s feet around the eyes, stubble, eyebrows, a sniveling drip of snot drooping from the nose, and a ghastly set of tombstone teeth. The helmet is believed to be a likeness of Henry’s favorite court jester Will Sommers who faithfully served the king throughout his life and was said to be the only man who could raise a smile on the old bloated king when he was ill and near death. The helmet also has a pair of ram’s horns which are thought to have been added by Henry which may suggest a cuckold or possibly the Devil. The Horned Helmet was mainly worn in royal parades rather than battle, though its bizarre design would have probably put the wind up any enemy soldiers.
 
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See more of King Henry VIII’s Horned Helmet, after the jump…
 

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Posted by Paul Gallagher
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02.07.2018
10:02 am
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‘Pulgasari’ - Kim Jong Il’s Comsploitation monster movie in full (with subtitles)

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The late Kim Jong-Il was a notorious film fanatic, but did you know that in the 70s he kidnapped a movie director called Shin Sang-ok, brought him to North Korea and forced him to make feature films? The most successful of these films is Pulgasari from 1985, a Godzilla-inspired monster movie-cum-allegory for capitalism run wild.

I was unaware of this incredible story until details of Kim’s life started emerging after the announcement of his death on Monday, but in 2003 Shin Sang-ok spoke to the Guardian about his ordeal:

In 1978, he fell foul of the frequently repressive government of General Park Chung Hee [South Korea], who closed his studio. After making at least 60 movies in 20 years, Shin’s career appeared to be over.

What followed, according to Kingdom of Kim, Shin’s memoir, was an experience that revived his career in an unbelievable way. Shin and his wife were kidnapped by North Korea’s despot-in-training, Kim Jong-il, who sought to create a film industry that would allow him to sway a world audience to the righteousness of the Korea Workers’ Party. Shin would be his propagandist, Choi his star.

Shin’s story is as fantastical as many of his movies. He writes of being caught trying to escape, and spending four years in an all-male prison camp as a result, left to assume that his wife was dead.

Then, just as suddenly, he was brought into the inner sanctum of Kim Jong-il, the would-be successor to his father, Kim Il-sung, who ruled the country for nearly 50 years. Shin’s talents then officially fell to the service of North Korea, and he made seven movies before he and his wife made a breathtaking escape in Vienna in 1986.

That entire piece is well worth reading, it’s fascinating! For those of you wondering what Pulgasari is like, here is the full, 94 minute film (in 9 parts, with English subtitles.) The story of a doll made of rice that comes alive after contact with human blood, and feasts on raw metal, the production values actually aren’t that bad - it’s certainly not the worst obscure B-movie I have ever seen (although admittedly I didn’t make it to the end.) But we will let you decide for yourselves, dear readers, whether Pulgasari is the crowning achievement of the Supreme Leader’s legacy:

Pulgasari, part one
 

 
Thanks to Simone Hutchinson!
 
Pulgasari parts two to nine are after the jump…

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Posted by Niall O'Conghaile
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12.21.2011
10:08 pm
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Bizarre Top Of The Pops dance routine for ‘O Superman’


 
As if it wasn’t weird enough that Laurie Anderson’s “O Superman” got to number 2 on the British charts in 1981, here’s a really strange dance routine by Zoo from Top Of The Pops to accompany the vocodered, beatless wonder. YouTube uploader Sambda says:

“A spectacularly bad dance routine. An extreme example of “Top Of The Pops” choreographer Flick Colby’s habit of taking all lyrics (including obvious allegories) at face value. So we have to have a judge, a mom-and-dad etc. I suspect the only reason Superman himself didn’t appear was down to a rights issue.”

I think he may be onto something. It’s also worth watching for Peter Powell’s bizarre chain-mail sweater at the start:
 
Laurie Anderson - “O Superman” Top Of The Pops 1981
 

Posted by Niall O'Conghaile
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08.24.2011
06:34 am
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Cats playing a Mini Theremin
06.28.2011
09:09 am
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The Theremin is a unique musical instrument that, according to WIkipedia;

“[was] originally known as the aetherphone/etherophone, thereminophone or termenvox/thereminvox [and] is an early electronic musical instrument controlled without discernible physical contact from the player. It is named after its Russian inventor, Professor Léon Theremin, who patented the device in 1928.”

A cat is a four legged feline animal that, according to Wikipedia;

“[is] also known as the domestic cat or housecat to distinguish it from other felines and felids, [and] is a small, furry, domesticated, carnivorous mammal that is valued by humans for its companionship and for its ability to hunt vermin and household pests. Cats have been associated with humans for at least 9,500 years.”

According to WIkipedia, the word “awesome” means: “...that which inspires awe.”
 
IT’S CATS PLAYING WITH A FREAKIN THEREMIN!!
 

 
BONUS!
You can see the “prequel” (Cats and Mini Theremin Part 1) here.
 
EXTRA BONUS!
If you were not aware of the existence of these Mini Theremins, they come in kit form, are cheap ($30) and look relatively easy to build. You can purchase a kit (and watch a video demonstrating the building process) at Maker Shed.

Posted by Niall O'Conghaile
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06.28.2011
09:09 am
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