Prankster Erik Meldik is better known in his Czech homeland as one half of the ViralBrothers—a kind of Eastern European Jackass. Together with Čeněk Stýblocarry, the ViralBrothers carry out stunts that “punk” hapless members of the public with supposedly comic results. Last month, Meldik pranked his girlfriend, Dominika Petrinova into believing he had accidentally put her pet dog into the washing machine. Dominika was understandably distraught, but rather than just smile and gracefully accept being pranked, she decided to have her revenge on Erik.
Dominika decided to glue two hair removal wax strips onto a plastic chair. She then blindfolded a naked and freshly showered Erik, before leading him into the living room, where she had him sit on the specially prepared chair. Instead of the expected birthday bj, Erik literally found himself on the receiving end of a rather painful revenge prank.
What’s worse than a fart in an elevator? Press play and find out…
That’s what these poor young chumps endured when pranked by some Brazilian “comedy” show for the viewing public’s edification and delight. As one commentator said “Just urgh…”
An Australian company going by the name Ship Your Enemies Glitter is offering to ... do I even have to finish this sentence? Wait, here: “So pay us money, provide an address anywhere in the world & we’ll send them so much glitter in an envelope that they’ll be finding that shit everywhere for weeks.”
The cost is $9.99 in Australian dollars, which is the equivalent of $8.14 in U.S. dollars. They refer to glitter as “the herpes of the craft world” because once the recipient opens the envelope then it will take forever to get the glitter out of every orifice, carpet, cushioned piece of furniture, plate of shrimp, etc. Of course if you’re not a complete fucking idiot you’ll open the envelope carefully and make sure not to get the glitter anywhere.
Here’s their rude FAQ section:
Is this for real?
Yes, you fucking idiot. We spent too much time, money & resources putting this shit hole of a website up to not get paid for it.
How does it work?
Click the buy button. Decide whose day you want to ruin & then enter their address.
What happens after I give you my money?
We’ll vomit up a tonne of glitter & put it in an envelope with your recipients address on the front of it. We’ll also include a note telling them how awful they are which will be folded within.
Will the recipient know who sent the glitter?
Not unless you open your mouth.
My recipient got glitter in both eyeballs, is now blind & would like to file charges. Help?
Heh.
How much does it cost?
$9.99AUD for anywhere in the world. Come on, it’s Australian Dollars so it’s probably only a few bucks for you.
Why should I pay you to send glitter to someone I hate?
First off, use your fucking imagination. We’re going to be pouring a tonne of glitter into an envelope with a folded up piece of paper. You know what’s going to happen when that fuckface opens the envelope & pulls out the letter? The craft herpes will be released & will go everywhere.
Why are you so obsessed with glitter?
Go fuck yourself.
For the past few days I’ve been seeing this “Killer Clown” prank video making the rounds on blogs. I always hesitate to click play on prank videos because they’re usually not that inspired or have goofball “Yakety Sax” background music. For whatever reason I finally clicked on the damned thing today and was pleasantly surprised at how sadistic and downright mean this prank is. I don’t know what I’d do if someone did this to me? Shit my pants? Cry? Try to kill them before they killed me?
If you haven’t seen this one yet, it’s worth taking a gander. The video was by Italian-based YouTube channel DM Pranks Productions.
In New Zealand, they don’t just have the best accents in the world, they also do the awesomest pranks. It seems that in the past this guy Russell Brown has perpetrated his share of pranks on his buddies, so they teamed up to get sweet revenge in a spectacular style. They got in touch with a local brewery called Tui and arranged to plumb beer throughout all of the pipes in Russell’s Auckland home. All the taps—even the showers—ran the pure hoppy elixir for at least that day.
Russell and his mates all had a good laugh, although apparently Russell’s wife was a bit put out.
The first video is the condensed version; find the longer version (only 7 minutes) after the jump. Jimmy Kimmel, thus far at least, hasn’t stepped into frame…
KTVU in Oakland fell victim to a Bart Simpson-ish racist prank today when they read aloud four purportedly “confirmed” names of those piloting Asiana Flight 214, the 777 that crash-landed at SFO over the weekend. The station has since apologized for this error…
As YouTube wag Christopher Grieb put it:
Well, this much is clear; Sum Dik Wad, from KTVU, will be spending a lot of time at the unemployment office next week…
If you’re a regular reader of MOJO (or this very blog for that matter) or if you are a former/current record store employee, then you will laugh your ass off at Rock, Rot & Rule, Scharpling & Wurster‘s infamous and hilarious reverse-engineered prank call cum classic comedic roasting of rock snobs. It’s heavy meta fun and has probably been played literally millions of times in vans stinking of skunky weed (and feet) by touring rock groups.
Tom Scharpling is the longtime host of “The Best Show” on WFMU. Superchunk drummer Jon Wurster—the two met at a My Bloody Valentine show—would call in to Scharpling’s show and pretend to be an annoying asshole, impervious to how oblivious he’s being long enough for the audience to become enraged and start calling in to debate him.
These two can hit it out of the ballpark. Their most famous creation is Rock, Rot & Rule where Wurster’s character, an infuriatingly dense, musically ignorant moron named “Ronald Thomas Clontle” promotes his upcoming book “Rock, Rot & Rule: The Ultimate Argument Settler” on Scharpling’s show.
“Clontle” feigns being distracted by TV basketball when the call comes from Scharpling, who is live on WFMU (“Orlando and Cleveland and I’ve got a lot of money riding on it and it’s not going my way. Wilkins just got hurt…”).
As Clontle reveals, the “scientific method” used to compile his 98 page “ultimate argument settler”—basically a list dividing all of popular music history into three categories: “rock,” “rot,” and “rule”—was simply to ask approximately 100 patrons of “Java The Hut,” the Lawrence, KS coffee shop (“Home of the bottomless Wookie”) he worked at to rank musical acts according to the preposterous criteria he devised. People were also canvassed at a record store near his grandmother’s home in Florida. He tells Scharpling, “I’m not a critic, I’m more a compiler of opinions.”
The Beatles merely “rock” but do not “rule” because, as Clontle says matter of factly, “they wrote a lot of bad songs.” Stereolab rots (sucks) “because they don’t use guitars.” (It’s not possible to “rock” unless you do. “Bruce Hornsby rules, but he doesn’t rock because he doesn’t play guitar.”)
Aerosmith, The Who and The Rolling Stones all “rule.” Dread Zeppeln rocks, Led Zeppelin rules. P. Diddy—then still known as “Puff Daddy”—“rules” and therefore rates more highly than David Bowie (who rots due to “too many changes”) or Neil Young who gets dinged for Trans and Landing on Water simply because Clontle has never heard any of his other albums..
Madonna rules. Supertramp rock. Kiss rule. Madness rule “because they started ska.” XTC rot. Yes rule, but not they do not rock. Emerson Lake and Palmer—as well as most, but not all, bands with prominent keyboards—definitely rot. Ween rule. Chilliwack gets weighted into “rulership” due to being Canadian (had they been America, they would merely rock, but it’s harder for Canadian groups to break out).
Frank Zappa rots because “humor has no place in music.” Kraftwerk rots. “I Want Candy” by Bow Wow Wow rules, but the band itself, well they rot. The Beach Boys (who had “some stinkers”) fall into the rarer “none of the above” category along with The Mighty Mighty Bosstones. Queen rules the most, AC/DC rocks the most and Billy Joel is the most rotten of them all.
You get the picture. After fifteen or so minutes of this torture, Scharpling starts taking some calls from enraged (or merely perplexed) listeners. One guy gets so angry and worked up that he never picks up on the joke and calls in to the switchboard THREE TIMES.
Jon Wurster is unflappable, a genius at playing clueless idiots right up there with Fred Willard. Presented with all manner of input from the callers, he merely “reports” what his surveys have found, no matter how inconsistent or completely idiotic what he is saying is.
It’s one of the all time classic radio pranks and right where you are sitting now, you can click here to listen on Spotify or listen on Grooveshark below:
UK Uncut describe themselves as “a grassroots anti-austerity network”. In the footnotes to this video, this is how UK Uncut they describe the boss of Her Majesty’s Revenue & Customs:
Dave Hartnett, head of HMRC, has spent the last few years shaking hands on sweetheart deals with multinational corporations. Vodafone were let off upwards of £6bn in tax, Goldman Sachs were let off over £10m in tax. By pure chance, Dave Hartnett also happens to be Whitehall’s most wined and dined civil servant, accepting expensive dinners and drinks from companies such as KPMG, Ernst and Young, PWC and, of course, Goldman Sachs.
On 9th November Dave Hartnett was delivering the keynote speech at the Corporate Tax Conference, the biggest annual gathering of everyone who’s anyone in corporate tax. Some UK Uncut activists dressed up as Vodafone and Goldman Sachs execs and surprised Dave to say a huge thank you for his kind favours.
A perfect “gift” for the narcissistic buddy in your life:
You’ve stuffed yourself full of noodles and wontons and spicy bits of fried chicken. Oh, and egg rolls and dumplings and those crunchy soft things that you’re not sure what they are, but dang are they good. And then the bill arrives - with fortune cookies. The fortune cookies serve to remind you how nice can be as you are parted with your money; a reminder of the delicious meal you just ate. Cracking the cookie, you read the fortune inside: “You will die alone and poorly dressed.” It’s at that moment, when you are stunned and your friends laugh at you, that you realize you’ve been slipped a Cookie Misfortune Evil Fortune Cookie.
. 