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There’s an eggplant Emoji vibrator
10.27.2016
08:53 am
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Right now, you’re probably saying to yourself “Finally!” I know I sure am. Frankly I think the friendly poop emoji would make for a better vibrator character but what the hell do I know? Okay, maybe I’m wrong here and the poop emoji would make an excellent buttplug. Or maybe not—it has eyes—now that I think about that, too. Why am I even contemplating such things? I’ve reached rock bottom, apparently.

Okay, so there’s this eggplant emoji vibrator and it’s selling for $32. As most people know by now, the eggplant emoji is a universal symbol for a penis. It’s called the Emojibator and has “10 vibration settings that always hit the spot.” It’s also waterproof. Good to know. And according to its description, it’s a “healthy serving of vitamin D.”

I don’t know what else to say except “Here it is, folks….”


 

 
via Geekologie

Posted by Tara McGinley
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10.27.2016
08:53 am
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‘Excess All Areas’: Mötley Crüe Vibrators
08.12.2016
10:23 am
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Mötley Crüe may be no more but they still have plenty of merchandise to sell.

Next month a range of eight Mötley Crüe Vibrators go on sale. These “eye-catching” (eye-catching? you’re obviously doing it wrong…) “vibes” are said to “capture”:

...the style and sex appeal of the band perfectly and deliver the power and pleasure you’d expect from The World’s Most Notorious Rock Band.

But wait there’s more…

Even those unfamiliar with the band are bound to enjoy them just as much thanks to the high quality, intense power and gorgeous designs.

The “vibes” are available in mini- and midi-size and are emblazoned with the iconic typography and distinctive artwork from some of Mötley Crüe’s classic albums:

Classic Skull 10 Function Bullet Vibrator (Gold)
Classic Skull 7 Function Vibrator (Black)
Dr Feelgood 7 Function Vibrator (Black)
Girls Girls Girls 10 Function Bullet Vibrator (Black)
Girls Girls Girls 7 Function Vibrator (Black)
Shout at the Devil 10 Function Bullet Vibrator (Pink)
Shout at the Devil 7 Function Vibrator (Black)
Too Fast For Love 10 Function Bullet Vibrator (Silver)

It would seem you’re not really successful unless you have a vibrator named after you.
 
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More ‘eye-catching’ Mötley Crüe vibes, after the jump…
 

READ ON
Posted by Paul Gallagher
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08.12.2016
10:23 am
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