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Arguing with idiots online wearing you down? You need Fallacy Ref!
07.15.2015
11:50 am

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Amusing

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Glen Welch is a theater and film critic for Houston, TX culture mag Red Publication, and he’s hit upon something so brilliant and necessary, its astonishing that it’s taken so long for someone to do it: he’s created a series of image macros featuring an NFL referee calling fouls on invalid argument tactics and sneaky rhetoric. I can see plenty of use for these in internet discourse, not least of all because of their admirable succinctness in explaining the various logical fallacies, and the humor in the frisson of philosophy and full-contact sports. And of course they’d serve as great shortcuts for legions of Facebookers weary of explaining to their politically outlying uncles for the millionth time what a slippery slope actually is and why they need to cut it the hell out already. Though Welch only just stared this project this past Friday, he’s already made over 50 of the things, and he takes requests.
 

 

 
The Fallacy Ref, it merits mentioning, is not Welch’s first time going viral. He’s the author of “Things Mr. Welch Is No Longer Allowed to Do in an RPG,” a project which began ten years ago today, and is still ongoing. Welch was gracious enough to chat with DM about the inspiration for the Ref project:

DM: Was there a specific online argument you were having or observing that you were responding to with the ref macros, or was there just more of a general sense of need for such a thing?

Welch: Believe it or not, it was an argument over the reasons why historians love FDR and economists hate him. The other person actually laughed at a claim about the New Deal creating a host of problems. I presented as an example of my claim a piece by Frederick Hayek, she dismissed him out of hand as a ‘discredited right wing hack’. That was when I got the mental image of a ref throwing a flag for a debate foul. So i created the “Appealing to the stone” ref as a joke.
 

 
DM: And they’re all the same ref, right? I didn’t peruse every single one yet, but it all looks like one dude. Do you know his name, and is he aware that he’s being macro’d?

Welch: Ed Hochuli, I have never met the man or talked to him. I hope he’s a good sport. I used him simply because he was the most famous NFL ref, so he would have the most pictures. Now he’s being called Ad Hoculi on forums though.

DM: Oh man, Ad Hoculi. That’s good!

Welch: The similarity was just a coincidence. But a funny one.

DM: These contain specialized knowledge. You’ve got some stuff in there that’s a few leagues beyond 101.

Welch: The Ref has been thoroughly checked by a legion of lawyers, professors and spellcheckers: according to my inbox, 63 people asking me to change, add or correct different entries.
 

 

 
More after the jump…

Posted by Ron Kretsch | Leave a comment
The ULTIMATE Jade Helm 15 conspiracy video
07.15.2015
10:45 am

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Amusing
Current Events
Idiocracy

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“IS THIS WHERE YOU WANT TO BE WHEN JESUS COMES BACK? I DON’T THINK SO! AMERICA, GET IT RIGHT!!

I still don’t know how people aren’t seeing that Operation Jade Helm is going down. This is a parking lot at Sam’s Club in San Angelo, Texas where there is obvious Jade Helm activity. There were containers, tarps on chain link fences, moving trucks with Knights Templar insignia on them, and all of this stuff was laid out in a triangle - obvious Illuminati involvement. This is big, people. Get right and get ready!

The only thing I’m going to say about this upfront is that a sizable percentage of the people reading this very sentence will hit play and not realize that this is satire.

And most of them will have something about the Confederate flag on their Facebook page. And bad hillbilly dental work. They will invariably be Republicans. I even bolded the part about it being satire. I’m mentioning it twice, aren’t I? Still some large number of people will not get the joke, or that the joke is, in fact, on them.

For everyone else, enjoy the comedic stylings of Get Right America.
 

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
For that friend who has everything (except class): A solid silver bumhole
07.15.2015
06:37 am

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Amusing
Sex

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Solid silver anus
Behold the solid silver anus!

The “WTF” section of unusual UK online gift shop Firebox, contains many strange things. Like a $46,000 floating hot tub (called the “Hot Tug”), and the most expensive vacuum cleaner in the world that retails for over $1.2 million dollars. These items pale in comparison to the “WTF” that is Firebox’s solid silver anus.

Billed as the “perfect gift for your tightest squeeze,” only 100 of these luxurious impressions were made. Crafted from 55 grams of silver and then bleached (because that was your next question, right?), Firebox credits the long, difficult casting process (that an actual human went through) that produced the seamless appearance of their silver anus.

It may also be important to note that it’s unclear if the silver anus, cast from the muscle that controls the exit door in your ass (or entrance, I don’t judge), belonged to a man or woman. While I’m no anatomy expert, it appears that it is likely the impression was obtained from a woman. So take that into account, as well as the $774.29 asking price if you’re thinking of picking one up. At the very least, Firebox certainly lives up to their motto that states the things that they sell are in fact, “Not for Everyone.”
 
Solid silver anus in gift box
 

Posted by Cherrybomb | Leave a comment
Yo La Tengo’s delightful cover of The Cure’s ‘Friday I’m In Love’
07.14.2015
12:27 pm

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Amusing
Music

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Yo La Tengo have just released a video for their cover of the Cure’s “Friday I’m in Love.” The song will appear on the album Stuff Like That There, due out late in August. It’ll feature plenty of covers besides “Friday,” including tunes by the Parliaments, Hank Williams, and the Lovin’ Spoonful.

Their version crushes the 1992 original, which has long been fanbase-breaker in the Cure’s oeuvre—mawkish, histrionic, popular as hell, but considered sub-par by just as many as those who adore it. It’s a love-it-or-hate-it song, and I’m pretty squarely in the hate-it camp. But Yo La Tengo’s version strips away all the Cure’s standard affectations, and the sincere, unpretentious rendition by YLT’s drummer Georgia Hubley reveals the lovely little song it could have been if the Cure hadn’t Cured it up quite so much. For revelatory covers of overblown pop songs, this ranks with Richard Thompson’s “Oops, I Did it Again.”

And the video is just wonderful. It features Hubely walking through the streets of Hoboken singing the song, apparently completely unaware that her singing is attracting giant exploding hearts to rain on the Earth. And as things get worse, the band’s sense of humor comes more and more to the fore.
 

Posted by Ron Kretsch | Leave a comment
Portlandia invaded by hundreds of sex toys dangling from power lines
07.14.2015
10:41 am

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Amusing
Sex

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In what experts on the scene have been calling “the best Twitter fodder imaginable” (quotation totally fabricated), dozens and dozens of large white and orange dildos have recently been spotted dangling from power lines all over Portland, Oregon. The sex toys have elicited no small amount of laughter, photos, and tweets.

The masturbation aids appear to have been strung together in pairs; unsurprisingly, according to department spokeswoman Lisa Leddy, they have prompted numerous reports to the Portland Office of Neighborhood Involvement.
 

 
In a conversation I wish I had been present to witness, a spokesman for public utility Portland General Electric said that he did not believe that the rubber products posed a fire hazard.

Some parents have been heard to express puzzlement as to what they’re supposed to tell their children when they point to the colorful toys hanging off the power lines.


 
Portland resident Lucila Cejas Epple first encountered the dildos at a street fair over the weekend: “You could spot them in several intersections and you could see all sorts of reactions to them. Some would blush, others would laugh, and most would take photos.”


 

Posted by Martin Schneider | Leave a comment
Mexican immigrant designs Donald Trump butt plug
07.13.2015
07:11 pm

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Amusing
Politics
Sex

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Artist Fernando Sosa—a Florida-based Mexican immigrant who came to the United States at the age of 11—has designed a delightful Donald Trump bum-hole plug.

I usually make Butt plugs to insult dictators, homophobes and politicians. However, when i heard [von Clownstick’s] remarks about Mexicans and latinos from south america i was extremely angry. You see I was born and raised in Mexico and moved to United States when i was 11 years old. So i don’t approve of what [F$27.99, Ted Cruz and the republican party have to say about us hard working americans.

When [Fuckface von Clownstick] decided to announce he is running for president he decided to use Latinos as a scapegoat and blame us for everything that is ailing America. Many republican politicians have done this before but never a politician running for president.

If you recall, Sosa was responsible for the Vladimir Putin plug last year. If you really got to own a Trump AKA “Fuckface von Clownstick” plug, they’re being sold on Shapeways for $27.99 plus shipping. It’s a steal!


 
via Death and Taxes

Posted by Tara McGinley | Leave a comment
Just like in ‘The Shining’: Try the Jack Torrance novel generator, because all work and no play…
07.13.2015
12:34 pm

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Amusing
Movies

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If you’ve seen Stanley Kubrick’s The Shining—and who hasn’t?—then you certainly remember the deliciously creepy moment when Shelley Duvall’s Wendy Torrance finally takes a peek at the manuscript her husband Jack has been working on for months—only to find that it’s just hundreds of pages of the phrase “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.” It’s an important scene because it establishes Jack as “starkers,” as the British say, once and for all, a dead-ender case with no hope for rescue, who incidentally wants to take an axe to his wife and son.

Now, the online application Psychotic Writer allows you to generate your own personal Jack Torrance looney-tunes novel. Press the button and off it goes! I went to the trouble of timing it. In 60 seconds it generated 12 full “chapters” of perfect, demented Torrance gobbledygook. When you hit “stop” you can then see the full PDF of the novel as it stands. You also have the option of creating a single chapter as a PDF.

Here’s some sample output:
 

 
Try it yourself!


 
via Kill Screen
 

Posted by Martin Schneider | Leave a comment
Fake ‘Customer Service’ trolls corporations’ Facebook pages. Hilarity ensues.
07.10.2015
06:14 am

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Amusing

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Atlanta comedian Ben Palmer is currently winning the Internet with his “Customer Service” Facebook account.

The sole purpose of this account is to give (hilarious) feedback to customer complaints on various corporations’ Facebook pages.

Acting as a “customer service representative,” Palmer addresses the petty grievances of irate clientele as if he were employed by the companies being complained about. Of course, most of these complaints are the stupidest “first world problems” imaginable, and to anyone who has ever worked in customer service, Palmer is saying all the snarky things the rest of us have always wanted to say to these bozo consumers.

The humor of the account lies in the fact that the people being responded to usually think they are actually being handled by corporate management. And the beauty is that Palmer isn’t actually doing anything illegal or misrepresenting himself under the names of these companies. His advice and responses, usually delivered with a cheery “hope that helps!” are coming from a separate Facebook entity named “Customer Service”—which isn’t necessarily a misrepresentation. Or at least probably not, legally.

Check out Palmer’s website, which is updated regularly. In the meantime, here’s a sampling of some of our favorite gripes and responses:


 

 

 

 
Oh there’s more, after the jump…

Posted by Christopher Bickel | Leave a comment
Someone etched ‘Macarena’ into a tortilla shell and played it like a record
07.08.2015
11:13 am

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Amusing
Food
Music
Science/Tech

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taco
 
If you need any other reason today to marvel at the universe we all inhabit, witness someone actually etching a round tortilla with a laser cutter and playing (extremely noise-buried) music. This most certainly expands the horizons of Record Store Day to include your taquerias and Mexican grocery stores, but you have to be somewhat of an artisan to pull it off. The Instructables site recommends uncooked flour shells over corn, less lumpy in texture than cooked flour and uncooked/cooked corn. Canasta brand is one of the more findable makes, and the 9” diameter allows for a lengthier tune (I supposed a smaller tortilla can be used for a Minor Threat or Minutemen song).

One big difference though is the playback between 45 RPM and 78 RPM; as you can tell by this etching of “Macarena,” the melody is barely audible through the gunk, though one can definitely make out the chorus when played at 45 RPM.
 


 
More clips, including the laser-etching process, after the jump…

Posted by Brian Turner | Leave a comment
Do not take a selfie next to an oncoming train: Russia’s goofy ‘Safe Selfie’ campaign
07.08.2015
08:59 am

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Amusing
Current Events
Science/Tech

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(Click on the image for a better view.)
 
According to the Izvestia newspaper, the Russian government has recently launched a campaign to persuade people not to take selfies in dangerous situations. The government was induced to take action after a series of incidents in which young people were seriously injured or even killed in the process of taking pictures of themselves.

The slogan of the campaign runs, “Even a million ‘likes’ on social media are not worth your life and well-being.”

I really wish I understood Russian, so that I could read the captions in the chart.

It’s difficult not to think of the Darwin Awards, which were and are bestowed on people who obliged humanity by removing themselves from the gene pool, by dying from what can only be called “stupidity.” Actually, a recent submission to the Darwin Awards recounts an incident from Kenya involving death-by-selfie; the opening line reads, “An attempt by two men to take photographs while touching an elephant’s trunk and tusks turned tragic when the beast suddenly turned against them and trampled them to death.”

It’s difficult to say how much a sign will help a person who is willing to entertain the idea of taking a selfie next to an oncoming train—and yet, who knows, maybe they will make a difference.
 

(Click on the image for a better view.)
 

 

 

 
More from Russia’s “Safe Selfie” campaign after the jump…

Posted by Martin Schneider | Leave a comment
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