“Mommy, I made a poopy”

I make no bones over the fact that I hate Republicans. I hate them. Loathe ‘em. All of them. If you call yourself a Republican and I’m not related to you by blood, you can just go fuck yourself. Right now. I can’t be any more clear on that, can I? Anyone who self-identifies as “a Republican,” you’re an idiot, and you’re clearly not bright enough to know that you’re an idiot, either, which must be a real disadvantage for you as you make your way through life.

However, I must say that I have looked at the vicious, gnashed-teeth, bare-knuckled school of political combat the GOP has waged for decades—the Lee Atwater-style skull-fucking—and find their efforts superior, far superior, to the wimpish Dems, who simply never seemed to be willing to “go there” like the GOP do, ready to kill without any hesitation and never holding anything back. Say what you will about Republicans, they will shiv you. Expect it. They play to win and in the Darwinian game of American politics, that’s worth something!

I don’t care much for the Democrats either, they sure aren’t a team I root for, either, but I will admit it, I do love watching Harry Reid and his Senate pals playing such HILARIOUS hardball with hapless conservative Senator David Vitter of Louisiana. He’s just so easy to fuck with—like shooting a big fat, diaper-clad Republican hypocrite in a barrel—who could resist? Apparently not even the characteristically milquetoast and timid Democrats.

Vitter, who—of course—claims to be a Christian, is that very special sort of Republican idiot, in that he lives in a glass house—he had an important (and deeply humiliating!) cameo role in 2007’s “D.C. Madam” scandal that he doesn’t deny—yet has no qualms about throwing boulders at other people, including those who lack health care. Vitter has been an especially vocal thorn in the side of Senate Democrats over Obamacare, trying to tie a dickish amendment to the energy bill and wasting an entire week of Senate work. But diaper-wearing David Vitter is about to get his comeuppance…

In fact, it’s already started, as Politico reports:

Vitter, a Louisiana Republican, has infuriated Democrats this week by commandeering the Senate floor, demanding a vote on his amendment repealing federal contributions to help pay for lawmakers’ health care coverage.

But Democratic senators are preparing a legislative response targeting a sordid Vitter episode. If Vitter continues to insist on a vote on his proposal, Democrats could counter with one of their own: Lawmakers will be denied those government contributions if there is “probable cause” they solicited prostitutes.

I daresay, I don’t think David Vitter’s feeling so smug this morning. The deeply hypocritical Vitter, a married father of four children and a pro-gun, anti-choice, anti-gay, anti-immigrant, “Family Values,” Tea party-backed conservative who says he believes in Creationism, is widely thought to be considering a run for the Governor of Louisiana in 2015. Now, thanks to Vitter’s own passive-aggressive petulant obnoxiousness, the entire country has been reminded again of his shitty diaper scandal. Nice work, asshole!

The only politician in America more embarrassing than David Vitter is Anthony Weiner!

UPDATE: My god is this man fucking stupid!