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Trump meets Ralph Wiggum: Quotes from one cartoon character put into the mouth of another
03.17.2016
01:01 pm
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When Ralph Wiggum from The Simpsons grows up he’s gonna be Donald Trump. In fact, he already is.

Meet Trump Wiggum. A mash-up of non-sequitur quotes from one cartoon character put into the mouth of another cartoon character.

If I didn’t know this was a mash-up, I’d swear these were genuine quotes straight from Donald’s gob.

Find more of these delights at Trump Wiggum.
 
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More from your future President, after the chump…

READ ON
Posted by Paul Gallagher
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03.17.2016
01:01 pm
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Deaf Leopards reach out to Def Leppard
03.11.2016
10:40 am
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The Arkansas School for the Deaf‘s team mascot has been the Leopards since 1941, though the members of British rock band Def Leppard were probably unaware of the school’s existence when they formed in 1977. The band’s name was originally “Deaf Leopard.” Influenced by the name “Led Zeppelin,” it was changed to “Def Leppard”—the original spelling seemed too “punk sounding.” 

Flashing forward to present day, photos of the Arkansas School For the Deaf’s team scoreboard have become a popular Internet share amongst pun-loving NWOBHM afficionados.
 

 
The Northwest Arkansas Democrat Gazette reports that a Change.org petition is now circulating, asking Def Leppard to take time off from their tour schedule, which takes them through Arkansas on May 11, to pay a visit to the School For the Deaf. Petition author Cary Tyson, a program officer at the Winthrop Rockefeller Institute, has suggested the band take a photo in front of the school’s now-iconic scoreboard as a way to raise awareness for the school’s work.

“What better place for a band photo?” wrote Tyson. “Help me convince the band to take a band photo in front of the scoreboard by signing this petition. Bring attention to a school that deserves it and does great work as well as a great band.”

As of this writing, the petition has a little over a thousand signatures.

Via: The Northwest Arkansas Democrat Gazette

Posted by Christopher Bickel
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03.11.2016
10:40 am
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Donald Trump’s eyes and mouth are interchangeable
02.26.2016
03:56 pm
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Well, here’s a thing: Someone has noticed that’s Donald Trump’s mouth forms the exact same shape as his eyes.

Danny from Northern Virginia tweeted the image of Trump’s face with his strangely tight-lipped eyes.
 

 
Not content with that, Danny then photoshopped Trump’s mouth onto his eyes to make his point indelibly clear.

He’s right—Trump’s mouth does match his eyes and putting his mouth where his eyes should be makes no discernable difference.

WTF does it this mean?

Who cares…? It’s a chance to troll Trump.
 

 
And if the eyes are the windows of the soul—then what does this tell us about he who would be king of America? If his mouth spews offensive racist and deluded gibberish and his eyes look like his mouth—then his soul must be one dark festering pus-filled sore of poisonous bile. Or something like that.
 
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H/T Buzzfeed.

Posted by Paul Gallagher
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02.26.2016
03:56 pm
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‘I’m stepping through the door And I’m floating’: David Bowie R.I.P.
01.11.2016
02:42 am
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Crushing news. It has just been announced that David Bowie has died of cancer at the age of 69. Anyone who has followed Dangerous Minds over the years know how much we adore the man. Our hearts are broken.

From Bowie’s official Facebook page:

David Bowie died peacefully today surrounded by his family after a courageous 18 month battle with cancer. While many of you will share in this loss, we ask that you respect the family’s privacy during their time of grief.

 
I’ve been charmed by many of David Bowie’s appearances on screen. But this clip from British TV when he was a mere 17 is particularly wonderful. His subversive humor is already beginning to blossom as the spokesperson for The Society For The Prevention Of Cruelty To Longhaired Men. Sly devil.
 

 

Posted by Marc Campbell
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01.11.2016
02:42 am
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Waiting for Gunmen: Wouldn’t this real life ‘Blazing Saddles’ make a great Netflix mockumentary?
01.07.2016
05:25 pm
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If you aren’t intensely following the developments of the Ammon Bundy-led heavily armed “peaceful protest” currently going on at the Oregon nature preserve, lemme tell ya, you are missing some Grade A comedy gold. Like how a fake “Ammon Bundy” on Twitter had hoaxed several mainstream media outlets. (The bearded cowboy derp with the big gun in Oregon is not on Twitter but apparently thought the parody account, this ersatz “Ammon Bundy” did a pretty good job of representing his “philosophy.” It’s a great detail, isn’t it?).

And now Donald Trump is weighing in, telling the New York Times editorial board:

“I think what I’d do, as president, is I would make a phone call to whoever, to the group. I’d talk to the leader. I would talk to him and I would say, ‘You gotta get out — come see me, but you gotta get out.”

It just keeps getting better and better. The latest news has a “representative” from the Trump campaign showing up with a camera crew to assist the militia group against “psychological warfare.”

I mean, what is this thing anyway? A sequel to Waiting for Guffman, with a Posse Comatose perhaps? Is it Blazing Saddles directed by Alex Jones?

Or perhaps it’s an Americanized take on Chris Morris’ darkly funny incompetent terrorist comedy Four Lions? I like that last notion the best, but as I am currently (like many of you reading this, I’m sure) binge watching Making a Murderer on Netflix, I can’t help but to hope that they are rolling video 24/7 at the protest.

Like imagine how this video, a “selfie” meant ostensibly for his wife and children, shot by self-promoting, self-aggrandizing “patriot” anti-Muslim hate crime-waiting-to-happen Jon Ritzheimer might be used in the context of a ten hour, true life Netflix mockumentary about this event. In the clip, Ritzheimer, then en route to the Oregon Mensa gathering at Malheur National Wildlife Refuge, tearfully explains how “Daddy took an oath!”
 

 
Wow! He’s the fucking best, right? I can’t get enough of this goofy human time bomb.

But another colorful figure is starting to grab some of the spotlight…

Meet LaVoy Finicum...
 

 
LaVoy Finicum! This has to be the best name for a gun-toting rural rube since something WC Fields came up with, like Elmer Prettywillie or J. Pinkerton Snoopington… LaVoy fucking Finicum! Say it aloud for the maximum comic effect.

If you google his name, you’ll see that LaVoy Finicum is a fellow rancher and supporter of Cliven Bundy, Ammon’s daffy pappy and advisor to “the negro.” Finicum is also the author of the self-published quasi-apocalyptic anti-government novel Only By Blood and Suffering. Here’s his own blurb for the book, taken from Amazon:

Tells of a family’s struggle to come together and survive in the midst of national crisis. A stirring, fast-paced novel about what matters most in the face of devastating end-times chaos. Filled with gripping action and relatable characters, readers are drawn into the heart-rending dilemmas each member of the Bonham family faces. You may even find yourself stopping to ask, “What would I do?” LaVoy Finicum is a real life Northern Arizona Rancher who loves nothing more in life than God, freedom, and family. His spine tingling storytelling conveys in graphic detail just how fragile and precious freedom truly is and leaves his readers with an increased desire to stand for freedom

LaVoy Finicum also has a website to promote himself and his novel, OneCowboysStandForFreedom.com. Since joining up with Ammon Bundy in Oregon, Finicum was tweeted, several times, to get the word out on his book.

I’m quite sure that, well, with a name like his that LaVoy Finicum is sincere about his goofy anti-government beliefs, but I also can’t help but wonder if he’s just trying to siphon off a lil’ of Ammon Bundy’s media spotlight to help himself to sell a few books?

Or maybe he’s just a complete nutjob?

Let’s let the man speak for himself. Here’s what he told an NBC reporter about how far he would go to defend his “freedom”:
 

 
LaVoy Finicum is also on Facebook, where his wall is currently filled with people calling him a fucking idiot and stuff like that.

More after the jump…

READ ON
Posted by Richard Metzger
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01.07.2016
05:25 pm
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Lemmy Kilmister’s memorial service to be live-streamed this Saturday
01.07.2016
02:31 pm
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This is great: For family, friends and fans not able to attend Ian Fraser “Lemmy” Kilmister’s memorial service, it will be live-streamed via Motörhead’s official YouTube page this Saturday.

SATURDAY JANUARY 9th THE WORLD CELEBRATES LEMMYOn SATURDAY JANUARY 9th, the world will come together and celebrate the…

Posted by Official Motörhead on Tuesday, January 5, 2016

 

 
via Motörhead on FB

Posted by Tara McGinley
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01.07.2016
02:31 pm
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Fire destroys Aleister Crowley’s former home Boleskine House
12.23.2015
05:18 pm
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A fire has destroyed much of Boleskine House, the former home of occultist Aleister Crowley and later Led Zepplin guitarist Jimmy Page. Firefighters were called to the house situated on the banks of Loch Ness at 13:40. hours GMT today, after flames were spotted engulfing the historic building.

A member of the Scottish Fire and Rescue Services told BBC News:

“A large part of the property has already been destroyed by fire and crews are concentrating their efforts on the west wing of the building.

“Crews in breathing apparatus are using four main jets to tackle the blaze and the incident is ongoing.”

 
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Aleister Crowley bought Boleskine House in 1899—then named the Manor of Boleskine and Abertarff—as he considered the building in the ideal location for carrying out the “Sacred Magic of Abramelin the Mage” from the grimoire The Book of Abramelin. Crowley said the building fitted the necessary requirements for the rite to work:

...the first essential is a house in a more or less secluded situation. There should be a door opening to the north from the room of which you make your oratory. Outside this door, you construct a terrace covered with fine river sand. This ends in a ‘lodge’ where the spirits may congregate.

For Crowley, Boleskine House was a “Thelemic Kiblah,” a “Magical East” where he could do his thing. The intention of the Sacred Magic of Abramelin the Mage is to invoke “one’s Guardian Angel.” The rite takes six months of abstinence and celibacy to prepare for. It is claimed that during the ritual Crowley was called away on an emergency to Paris—leaving the rite unfinished and causing a strange, monstrous disruption to the loch.

...the spirits he summoned got out of hand, causing one housemaid to leave, and a workman to go mad. He also insinuates he was indirectly responsible for a local butcher accidentally severing an artery and bleeding to death. Crowley had written the names of some demons on a bill from the butcher’s shop.

Some have said these “demons” are also responsible for the Loch Ness monster.
 
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In 1970, Jimmy Page bought Boleskine House—which was then in considerable disrepair. Page was fascinated by Crowley’s ideas and had the property renovated—though he rarely stayed at the house. He sold the property in 1992.
 
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In 200, BBC Scotland produced a documentary on Boleskine House Aleister Crowley: The Other Loch Ness Monster, which traced the occult history of the property and the story of the infamous unfinished ritual that unleashed evil forces.
 

 
Via BBC

Posted by Paul Gallagher
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12.23.2015
05:18 pm
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‘The Facebook Scam’: Man’s righteous rant about how Facebook thieves are posting his videos
12.16.2015
07:39 am
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If you don’t know by now, there’s been much chatter on the Internet about how Facebook is letting people rip videos from YouTube and then allowing them to upload the stolen videos directly to their page even if they don’t own the content or copyright. These videos get millions and millions of views. If you’re still not exactly sure of what I’m talking about, there’s a great video called “How Facebook is Stealing Billions of Views” that speaks at length about the whole copyright / video theft. In a nutshell, Facebook is allegedly making big money from pilfered content.

Below, is a short video of “Ethan” from h3h3productions describing the theft of his videos and just how hard it is to file a copyright grievance with Facebook and to have the videos removed from the thief’s page. Basically, you can’t.

 
via reddit

Posted by Tara McGinley
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12.16.2015
07:39 am
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Female lawmaker hilariously troll-proposes to limit men’s access to boner pills
12.14.2015
10:07 am
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Democratic member of the South Carolina House of Representatives, Mia McLeod, filed a bill on December 10th calling for any man seeking to obtain a prescription for Viagra, Cialis, Levitra or other such erectile dysfunction drugs, to be required to obtain a notarized affidavit from his sexual partner, undergo a cardiac stress test, and receive sexual counseling.

McLeod admits in an interview with South Carolina’s Free Times that she’s basically trolling her colleagues who have proposed restrictions on abortion:

“Those who are adamant about introducing some type of abortion bill every session, that’s really what this is about — I’m just sick of it. We’ve got much bigger fish to fry. I just decided that until they could stay out my uterus I would refuse to stay out of their bedroom.  All the things that they come up with are invasive… They’re not necessary. I just think it’s time for a little pushback on that end.”

 

Representative Mia McLeod
 
Among the “invasive” requirements in McLeod’s proposed “pushback” legislation, men would be

-required to obtain a notorized affidavit “in which at least one of the patient’s sexual partners affirms that the patient has experienced symptoms of erectile dysfunction during the 90 days preceding the affidavit’s date.”

-required to submit to a cardiac stress test.

-required to receive “extensive written notification of the dangers of such drugs, followed by a 24-hour waiting period.”

-required to attend counselling sessions that include “resources for patients to pursue celibacy as a viable lifestyle choice.”

Though it’s a brilliant ploy, McLeod admits it’s not likely to fly:

“I don’t expect a whole lot to happen with this bill other than to put them on notice.”

Put ‘em on notice, Mia!
 

 
Via: Eva Moore, Free Times

Posted by Christopher Bickel
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12.14.2015
10:07 am
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Bald Eagle attacks Donald Trump, entire world rejoices
12.10.2015
08:32 am
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Here’s behind-the-scenes video footage of a 27-year-old bald eagle named “Uncle Sam” hatin’ on Donald Trump. The footage comes from a TIME photoshoot shot back in August for a cover story on a billionaire asshat running for President on the GOP ticket.

I’m not quite sure, but there might be something kinda symbolic here? Do you feel me?

The world’s new hero is Uncle Sam. Good on ya, buddy.


 

Posted by Tara McGinley
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12.10.2015
08:32 am
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