“As it was in the days of Noah, so shall it be in the days of the Son of Man.”—Luke 17

We covered crazy old coot, Harold Camping last year around this time when Camping and his dim-witted followers/employees announced that the Rapture was coming on May 21, 2011. Of course, Mr. Camping has made incorrect predictions in the past about the end of the world, but this hasn’t stopped him from trying again (hey, a stopped clock is right twice a day, isn’t it?). This time Camping is SO SURE that he got the math right, that he and his followers/employees have announced an aggressive advertising campaign with tee-shirts, tracts, postcards, stickers, outdoor advertising and even e-Bibles that the younger set can use on their iThingees.

Family Radio Inc., Camping’s company has also set up WeCanKnow.com, where you can learn all about the various ways the great man figured out when the Rapture would take place. How convenient that this is all happening when Camping himself is only 88-years-young. If his batshit crazy wish fulfillment nonsense turns out to be correct, HE’LL NEVER HAVE TO DIE. (And what’s more, when the Rapture comes, he’ll be young again! All the people in Heaven are in their prime. We know this because a kid who had an NDE told Gretchen Carlson all about it on Fox News!).

It’s all just a matter of simple math! From The Tennessean:

According to Camping’s prediction, the Rapture will happen exactly 7,000 years from the date that God first warned people about the flood. He said the flood happened in 4990 B.C., on what would have been May 21 in the modern calendar. God gave Noah one week of warning.

Since one day equals 1,000 years for God, that means there was a 7,000-year interval between the flood and rapture.

Got it?

Billboards like the one above are about to start appearing in Louisville, St. Louis, Detroit, Little Rock, Omaha, Kansas City, Fort Wayne, Ind., and Bridgeport, Conn. There are already 40 such signs in the Nashville area alone. Family Radio Inc., will also be sending RVs around the country with witnesses for Camping’s Rapture date prediction.

I look at it this way: I’d love it if Camping were correct and all the Christians (including Sarah Palin, the Teabaggers, Bryan Fischer, etc) get whisked up to Heaven en masse with Baby Jesus and assigned their fucking harps. We’d all wake up in a much saner world on May 22, 2011, if you ask me. Good riddance.

Previously on Dangerous Minds:
2012 is for Suckers, part 2: Old Coot says Rapture nigh

 
“My mom thinks that where I’m living down here the Hippies are a bunch of dirty, filthy, infectious people. This is my bag and I found my place here and I scream and I holler and I’m happy.”

CBS TV documentary from 1967 exposes the shocking truth about America’s drug-addled youth. Prepare yourself for a terrifying descent into an LSD hellhole. 50 minutes of pure hedonism with Harry Reasoner.
 

 
More hippie filth after the jump…

 
A message of holiday cheer, questionable reasoning and spurious leaps in logic from William “The Tap” Tapley, self-proclaimed “Third Eagle of the Apocalypse” and “Co-prophet of the Endtimes.”

Design by This Is My Name

Here’s a lovely video montage illustrating why Black Friday is so freakin’ disgusting awesome. Extreme hysteria at its finest.

What’s wrong with people?
 

 
(via TDW)

 
Looks like the hate-filled, hateful haters of the Westboro Baptist Church got an unambiguous glimpse of how the outside world feels about them, yet again this weekend, when their tires were slashed in Kansas, but it gets even better, as no one would help them:

McALESTER - Members of a Kansas church that protests at military funerals may have found themselves in the wrong town Saturday.

Shortly after finishing their protest at the funeral of Army Sgt. Jason James McCluskey of McAlester, a half-dozen protesters from Westboro Baptist Church in Topeka, Kan., headed to their minivan, only to discover that its front and rear passenger-side tires had been slashed.

To make matters worse, as their minivan slowly hobbled away on two flat tires, with a McAlester police car following behind, the protesters were unable to find anyone in town who would repair their vehicle, according to police.

Over 1000 people turned out to counter-protest the group drown out the cult’s by now familiar refrain of “God Hates Fags” etc, etc.

Update: Dangerous Minds pal Matt Dunnerstick points out, “God hates flats.”

Westboro protesters face jeers and slashed tires (Tulsa World)

Via Little Green Footballs

 
Since I don’t speak Korean, I don’t want to read too much into the behavior on exhibit here, but it does look a bit strange, even to someone raised in the heart of the Bible belt. Is this a mass infusion of the holy spirt or some sort of (mainly) female shamanism, a variety that doesn’t translate so easily? It really starts to, uh, really cook, at about 1:17 in, but at least sample the beginning, as it makes what follows seem all the more surreal. Pentecostalism Korean-stylee or what?

The same person who posted the video above also posted this. It’s pretty amazing/weird, almost like a Haitian voodoo ceremony. Dig the bongo players!:
 

Via Christian Nightmares

 
Illinois Rep. John Shimkus—candidate for chair of the House Energy and Commerce Committee—is sure that climate change is no big whup. How does he know this? The Bible tells him so: God promises Noah he’ll never again destroy the earth and all living things. Whew! We’re all safe! Even us unbelievers!

Progress Illinois gives more reasons why Shimkus, of course a Republican, is probably not the best man for the job:

During a discussion at a hearing about the Environmental Protection Agency’s ruling that greenhouse gases threaten public health and the environment, Shimkus noted that carbon dioxide is a natural result of breathing and asked, “Does EPA propose we stop breathing?” (They do not.) At a dinner held by the Sangamon County Republicans in February, Shimkus suggested that the sight of farmers “ice-fishing on ponds in Southern Illinois” is the latest evidence that global warming is a “hoax.” Oh, and let’s not forget the time Shimkus expressed fear that curbing carbon emissions would “take away plant food.” (Scientists disagree.)

This idiot should be pointed at and laughed at. Instead we elect ignoramuses like this to Congress! We’re doomed!

Via Gawker

 
Hatsune Miku, the holographic J-Pop superstar from Japan, commands legions of fans who go totally nuts for her, almost exactly the same way fans of Miley Cyrus do for her.  As cool as this technology is (and it’s very cool), I just can’t imagine an audience going so crazy for something like this on these shores. It would be like freaking out over The Archies.

 
Thanks, Juan Monasterio!

 
Public service announcement from the 1970’s.

A magician selling drugs to kids?!

The little blonde dude knows more about dope than I do.
 

 
The Big Cube, a 1969 LSD exploitation flick starring a washed-up Lana Turner and West Side Story’s George Chakiris, is a miasma of nightmarish psychedelic cliches intended to scare kids away from LSD. This turkey is a blast from beginning to end. Highly recommended. Watch it while you’re high.