“Leave it to a man to figure that one out,” said my lovely wife to the news that a Japanese researcher has discovered that certain sounds—even ringtones—can have a physical effect on the body, even causing women’s breasts to grow larger. From Noise Addicts:

In Japanese cities, people use cell phones. A LOT. It’s not uncommon for people in Tokyo to hear their cell phone ring 20-40 times per day. Hideto Tomabechi, one of the guys who helped deprogram members of the Aum Shinrikyo cult in Japan, has embedded a sound in a ringtone that fools your mind into interpreting it as a crying baby. 

The hypothesis is that if women’s minds and bodies respond to the ringtone in the same way that they are known to respond to a real crying baby, then they will experience the same physiological effects as if they heard the real thing. If it’s heard often enough, over time their breasts will grow.

If you’re a man and aren’t to thrilled about the idea of getting larger breasts, he also has ringtones in the works that he claims will improve your memory, make you more attractive to the opposite sex, cure baldness, and help you give up smoking. It’s all about the ringtones, baby.

What, now you want a copy of the ringtone to secretly put on your girfriend’s phone (or maybe you just want to hear it)?  Here you go

I love how the ringtone is called “Rock Melon”! It’ll rock yer melons all right…