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Newt Gingrich, dotty old grandpa, confused by what to call a smartphone?
04:46 pm


Newt Gingrich

Newt Gingrich must be politicking hard for this year’s Captain Obvious prize… Exactly who does Newton think he’s talking down to in this video? Or does he really think that he’s somehow got a “point” to make about the supposed (huh?) confusion (again I must ask: HUH?) over what to call today’s newfangled smart-phones…?

Or is Newt just confused?

I’m confused. But the most confusing thing of all is why this pointlessly pointless video even exists… Is there a prize if you come up with something better than “smart-phone”?

Here are the most recent YouTube comments:


Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
The Republican Party eats its own: Newt Gingrich and the Tea party vs. Karl Rove

Field marshal Rove?

The leader of the Tea Party Patriots organization issued an apology on Tuesday to Karl Rove after the group sent out a fundraising email with a doctored photo depicting the GOP adviser in a Nazi uniform.

Wait a minute? Republicans calling other Republicans Nazis??? Whoa! This means the Tea party blockheads are beginning to hate Rove with the same sort of bile these characters normally reserve for Obama? How very, very fascinating!

The solicitation was titled, “Wipe the Smirk Off Karl Rove’s Face” and read:

“Karl Rove believes he can raise hundreds of millions of dollars, crush the Tea Party movement and protect the big-government status quo in Washington from millions of freedom loving Americans.”

Hilarious, but all too predictable. There is nothing, I repeat nothing, that gives me more joy than to see the country’s DUMBEST voting block splintering into angry, impotent… hate cults. To watch the disciplined Republican Party devolve into fractious groups that utterly despise each other—in real time, yet—is such a deeply pleasurable thing.

From all appearances, the GOP still cannot fathom the demographic tidal wave that hit them in the ass on Election day. Forget about all this talk of “rebranding.” I mean, these guys are fucked—fuckity fuck fuck fucked—and the smartest ones in their ranks have figured this out. They’ve got an insurmountable problem on their hands called their own voters!

How can you cater to the lowest IQ buffoons, racists, gun nuts, women haters, Creationist lunatics and cranky old people for decades and then try to turn that barge of fools around on a dime, all the while losing elections and presenting your biggest donors with NOTHING for the return on their (huge) investments? It can’t be done and I think the younger Republicans realize the brand is now so badly tainted and beyond repair that they’re starting to think “Why bother with these dipshits?”

The savvy old hands like Newt Gingrich know this. When he waged his notoriously vicious scorched earth campaign against Mitt Romney in the GOP primaries last year, it quite obviously got to the point where Gingrich just didn’t give a fuck anymore. He wasn’t in it for the good of his party (if he was he never would have considered running in the first place), he was only in it for himself. Even longtime Gingrich watchers were shocked by the hardcore nature of his attacks. Republicans aren’t supposed to speak ill of their fellow Republicans. Haven’t they heard of Reagan’s 11th Commandment? Newt pissed on Romney with gleeful abandon.

Turns out that might’ve been Newt just clearing his throat for his latest scheme…

Gingrich was left badly in debt by his ill-fated Presidential candidacy. One of his think tanks was forced into bankruptcy last Spring and he was reportedly nearly $6 million in debt by June. Say what you want about Newt, he’s got a pretty astute sense of what the most numbnuts conservative punter really cares about. If “Newt Inc.” (as Gingrich calls his various enterprises) is faltering, what’s (newly) poor Newt gonna do? It’s reinvention time.

If the party’s fucked anyway, I predict that Gingrich is going to make a new career out of what he previewed last year, and that is vilifying “the Republican establishment” for fun and profit. I’m pretty sure he looks at the carcass of the GOP like a vulture would, as something to be picked clean. I can’t say I blame him.

Even if the Republican Party moving forward from 2013 is relegated to a mere shadow of its former self, a diminishing and rapidly dying-off fiefdom of free market/Fox News/Christianist idiocy, what’s left of the GOP will still be an awful lot of people. Newt can be the leader of that club. He’ll never, ever get near the White House, but there are tens of millions of dollars in it for him to wrest a good portion of the GOP and divert it into his own personal cash cow. Newt can do that demonizing Karl Rove as the personification of the establishment and setting himself up as the “anti-Rove.”

I think it could happen. If there is one thing the Tea partiers love, it’s a mean cuss. Who’s meaner than Newt Gingrich? I can’t see their allegiance going readily to other GOP figures. And look how visible he’s been lately. Newt has adroitly sniffed the fart of populist rage that the GOP’s rank and file feel towards the party’s establishment. There’s a cheap and cheerful way for him to capitalize on it and that is to pile on Karl Rove.

What’s hilarious to me, though, is how Gingrich manages to keep a straight face while saying shit like this, as he wrote in Human Affairs:

I am unalterably opposed to a bunch of billionaires financing a boss to pick candidates in 50 states. This is the opposite of the Republican tradition of freedom and grassroots small town conservatism.

So wrote the man whose entire run at the nomination was funded by ONE billionaire, Sheldon Adelson!

Obviously Gingrich believes Republicans have the memory of goldfish, but you can see how he’s positioning himself and it’s clever. If you have Rove leading the establishment Republican charge and the Newtster setting himself up to profit from the appearance of combating Rovers influence, well, grab some popcorn, this is going to get good.

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Newt and Callista, the next Regis and Kathy Lee?
09:45 pm


Newt Gingrich
Callista Gingrich

The real reason he ran, obviously. As if this news should surprise anyone.

Please God, make this happen!

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Everybody hates Newt

I LOL’d at this comically forlorn shot of loathsome sack of shit former Speaker of the House and Republican Presidential candidate Newt Gingrich at the Faith & Freedom Coalition’s meeting in Washington, D.C. today.

Doesn’t ANYONE give a shit about Newt? Apparently not even conservatives do, which is something for the cable news channels to take note of.

CNN, CNBC and MSNBC—we know Fox News isn’t going to have him back—need to let this slimy amphibian crawl under a rock and delete his number from their auto-dial. No one will miss not seeing Newt Gingrich on their teevee set. No one cares what he thinks.

Now that it’s patently obvious she’s never going to be First Lady—and he’s flat broke—I wonder how long pretty “Stepford Wife” Callista will stick around? Can you imagine what it would be like to watch that old goat age? Sitting around in his underpants farting and pontificating about stuff every day of your fucking life?

She clearly got the wrong end of a poorly negotiated Faustian bargain!

Via BuzzFeed

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‘Politics is weird. And creepy’: Fox’s Shep Smith speaks unvarnished truth!

Fox News’ Shep Smith reacts to Mitt Romney’s reaction to Newt’s departure from the race the way a sane person should…

Dangerous Minds pal Taylor Jessen writes:

“A clip that needs no context, really. Soon to be a shirt, a dance remix, and possibly a new political party. Shep Smith is, for a moment, a bona fide deer in the mind-numbingest of headlights.”


Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Newt Gingrich, won’t you please just finally f*ck off?
10:42 pm


Newt Gingrich

Huh? Newt Gingrich is still dropping out of the Republican presidential primary race?

Wait a minute. I thought that… Didn’t he already drop out? Last week?

Is he doing it again?

Although it sure seemed like Gingrich pulled out last week, it was really just another coy act of Newtus interruptus. He didn’t technically drop out, drop out, last week, Gingrich was only giving the media some, er, polite advance notice that he was going to drop out next week, which is now this week. Then he was supposed to make the “big announcement” that no one gives a flying fuck about today, I’d read, but that didn’t occur either (not like all that mainstream media OWS coverage was exactly crowding him out, ostensibly this was a slow news day, wasn’t it?).

Pathetically, and perhaps in a last gasp desperate bid to give the world’s news media one final chance to send camera crews (or even just an unpaid intern) to cover this historic event, Newt told the “insiders” who are his “close personal friends” and supporters via an amateurish YouTube clip (see below) that tomorrow is now the big day that he will again announce the same thing he just said in the YouTube video and that we all already knew from last week. Is he milking this shit or what?

Tomorrow it’ll be officially, officially official:

We won’t have Newt Gingrich to kick around anymore.

Lest any non-American readers be confused by how such a hideous and disgusting human being as Newt Gingrich could become a Presidential candidate of one of the two major American political parties—and not merely a candidate, but briefly the front-runner—wonder no more: He never was a plausible candidate in the first place, certainly no more likely to end up with the GOP nod than Michele Bachmann, Rick Santorum, Herman Cain or Ron Paul.

American politicians tend to, uh, “ordain” themselves and Gingrich, who has always seen himself as a “great man” (despite all of the vast piles of historical evidence that show him to be a nasty, brutish, power-mad, egotistical, tantrum-prone, OCD philanderer without a self-reflexive bone in his body), felt his “calling” and blah, blah, blah, but make no mistake about it, Newton Leroy Gingrich never had an ice cube’s chance in Hell of becoming the leader of the free world, no matter how many times he CRAVENLY and TRANSPARENTLY invited comparisons to Margaret Thatcher and Ronald Reagan that NO ONE cared to make on his behalf or repeat, except to mock him!

As a candidate, Gingrich always was DOA. His brief front-runner status was puzzling, if not exactly all that alarming, because it was obviously so temporary and insignificant (In the end Gingrich received 2.5 million votes in a country of 300 million people, for a little perspective). That he got anywhere whatsoever is testament to his “fundamental” ORNERY VICIOUSNESS that appeals to the large, but dwindling, All-American demographic of older, Fox News-watching white dudes. For a brief, shining minute there, Newt looked like their knight in shining armor, the one who would say the nastiest things to that Kenyan Socialist occupying the White House.

Gingrich threw some red meat meanness to the idiots and they started barking and clapping like seals. Even dumbshit Sarah Palin got on board the Newt train, the low IQ “real America” seal of approval.

I’ll repeat myself for our non-American readers, Gingrich had no chance of ever getting elected President. None. Zero. Zip. His odds of becoming the POTUS were only slightly higher than yours or mine because he managed to convince a dimwitted billionaire casino magnate to drop MILLIONS OF DOLLARS on his pointless vanity candidacy and because, well, because fuckin’ South Carolina, ‘nuff said.

There is probably only but one man in America who seriously believed that Newton Leroy Gingrich could ever become the President of the United States and that one man also happens to be named Newton Leroy Gingrich. The idea that this repulsive, hypocritical turd would ever find himself in a position of elected power again, is, of course, preposterous on the face of it. Everyone—except say for Newt himself (and maybe Callista and maybe Sheldon Adelson) knew he was a no-hoper from the start. The only surprise for me was that he was taken more seriously by the media than either Buddy Roemer or Gary Johnson, both credible former GOP governors, both horses in the race with, you’d think, far better chances with voters than the decidedly unpopular Newt Gingrich. Hell, Scott Walker has a better chance of becoming president than Gingrich ever did.

Truly, it would have been fantastic to have seen Gingrich get the GOP nomination, strictly from the lulz perspective of seeing the Republicans utterly destroyed in a national election, but you’d have to sift through trillions upon trillions of alternate universes to find the one in which the pretty blonde “Stepford wife” Calista kissed a disgusting salamander that would turn into the POTUS (it’s a parallel dimension where gravity has failed, “fun” has been outlawed and Snookie is the Secretary of Spray Tans). It’s never, ever going to happen.

(If Gingrich’s presidential ambitions aren’t totally dead, my advice to him would be to become cryogenically frozen and then get himself defrosted a couple of hundred years from now like in Idiocracy. Under those circumstances, he might stand a chance! (As Paul Krugman memorably quipped about him, Newt Gingrich is a “stupid man’s idea of what a smart person sounds like.” Vicious, but too, too true.)

In the end, rest assured, dear “foreign” readers and make no mistake about it: If there was a devastating nuclear war and the sitting President—whoever he may be—his entire cabinet, every member of Congress and every single high ranking member of the US military were dead and Newt came forward from the political wilderness, just like his inspiration, Winston Churchill, and selflessly offered to lead a tattered and broken nation, the nearest person with a loaded gun and a lick of sense would shoot the guy right in the fucking face without a moment’s hesitation!

Newt Gingrich, we hardly knew ye! You’ve obviously got nowhere to go but… away.

Now piss off, you slimy amphibian. For good this time.

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Newt gets a flat tire in West Hollywood, does not have a gay old time

Photo by @ImChrisHughes via Twitter

Of all of the places in America for that slimy amphibian’s tour bus to get a flat!

It’s really a pity this didn’t happen in front of Rage!!!

Via KPCC radio’s website:

The presidential hopeful who recently called gay marriage a “perfect example of what I mean by the rise of paganism,” set off a Boystown brouhaha last night when his Newt 2012 campaign bus broke down in West Hollywood. 

Newt Gingrich’s bus, missing a tire and flashing its hazards, was stranded half in a lane of traffic near Sunset and Crescent Heights for hours. It was unknown if he was on the bus at the time of the incident. Calls to Newt’s headquarters were not immediately returned.

Gingrich, who is in Los Angeles campaigning, did not receive much sympathy for his vehicle’s mechanical difficulties. Instead, locals took to Twitter with red-white-and-blue language, unsolicited advice, claims of voodoo, musings on karma, and at least one mention of a glitter-bomb:


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Newt Gingrich’s PRO-medical marijuana letter to the editor, 1982

Well, well, well… Look who was PRO-medical marijuana—actually went out on a limb for it—way back before he wanted to behead people and cut off their hands for possessing it…

Here’s what Newt Gingrich wrote to the Journal of the American Medical Association in 1982:

Legal Status of Marijuana

To the Editor:

The American Medical Association’s Council on Scientific Affairs should be commended for its report, “Marijuana: Its Health Hazards and Therapeutic Potential” (1981;246:1823). Not only does the report outline evidence of marijuana’s potential harms, but it distinguishes this concern from the legitimate issue of marijuana’s important medical benefits. All too often the hysteria that attends public debate over marijuana’s social abuse compromises a clear appreciation for this critical distinction.

Since 1978, 32 states have abandoned the federal prohibition to recognize legislatively marijuana’s important medical properties. Federal law, however, continues to define marijuana as a drug “with no accepted medical use,” and federal agencies continue to prohibit physician-patient access to marijuana. This outdated federal prohibition is corrupting the intent of the state laws and depriving thousands of glaucoma and cancer patients of the medical care promised them by their state legislatures.

On Sept 16, 1981, Representative Stewart McKinney and I introduced legislation designed to end bureaucratic interference in the use of marijuana as a medicant. We believe licensed physicians are competent to employ marijuana, and patients have a right to obtain marijuana legally, under medical supervision, from a regulated source. The medical prohibition does not prevent seriously ill patients from employing marijuana; it simply deprives them of medical supervision and access to a regulated medical substance. Physicians are often forced to choose between their ethical responsibilities to the patient and their legal liabilities to federal bureaucrats.

Representative McKinney and I hope the Council will take a close and careful look at this issue. Federal policies do not reflect a factual or balanced assessment of marijuana’s use as a medicant. The Council, by thoroughly investigating the available materials, might well discover that its own assessment of marijuana’s therapeutic value has, in the past, been more than slightly shaded by federal policies that are less than neutral

Newt Gingrich
House of Representatives
Washington, DC

Fourteen years later, as House Speaker, this same hypocritical piece-of-shit would introduce the Drug Importer Death Penalty Act of 1996, which called for executing any person caught importing just an ounce or two of high-grade marijuana (“100 usual doses” is how it was written in the legislation, which obviously didn’t pass).

What’s more, when challenged about his own admitted use of marijuana in the past, Gingrich had this to say to Wall Street Journal reporter Hilary Stout:

“That was a sign we were alive and in graduate school in that era. See, when I smoked pot it was illegal, but not immoral. Now, it is illegal AND immoral. The law didn’t change, only the morality… That’s why you get to go to jail and I don’t.”

“Okay for thee, but not for me,” sez rich, well-fed white guy. Thanks for the succinct explanation, mean old man!

Now, if you’re looking to make sense of this stuff don’t even try. He’s a Republican, ‘nuff said.

Here’s what Gingrich said at a fundraiser for fellow Georgia GOP pol Rep. Charlie Norwood in 1995:

“If you import a commercial quantity of illegal drugs, it is because you have made the personal decision that you are prepared to get rich by destroying our children. I have made the decision that I love our children enough that we will kill you if you do this.”

“I have decided”???

Imagine this asshole being allowed to decide anything of importance!

Gingrich, unable to help himself, continued:

“The first time we execute 27 or 30 or 35 people at one time, and they go around Colombia and France and Thailand and Mexico, and they say, ‘Hi, would you like to carry some drugs into the U.S.?’ the price of carrying drugs will have gone up dramatically.”

Ethan Nadlemann, the executive director of Drug Policy Action, a bipartisan advocacy group for ending the drug war called Gingrich “basically a nightmare” when it comes to drug policy issues. “For a guy who’s supposed to be an intellectual and intelligent, the quality of the argumentation on his part is embarrassing.”

As one wag quipped on the topic of Drug Importer Death Penalty Act of 1996 at The People’s Forum:

Fortunately didn’t pass. His other proposed acts, the Serial Adultery Death Penalty Act and the Congressional Influence Peddling Death Penalty Act, unfortunately failed as well. And he reportedly killed the Fat Loudmouth Pandering Pseudo-Intellectual Death Penalty Act before it could be introduced.

Republicans whine and Republicans bitch/Our rich are too poor and our poor are too rich.

Below, Newt Gingrich shooting his big mouth off about the drug war and how the US should emulate Singapore(!) on The O’Reilly Factor as “Papa Bear” nods with approval.

Thank you Mr. Michael Backes of Sacramento, CA!

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
WHAT does Nancy Pelosi know about Newt???
11:51 am


Newt Gingrich
Nancy Pelosi

Whenever someone plays all coy like “I know something you don’t know, nah-nah-na-nah-nah” it’s always maddening, but when the subject of the withheld secret is disgraced former Speaker of the House, Newton Leroy Gingrich, and the holder of the keys to that mystery taunting the American electorate is House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi—who was on a House ethics committee that investigated Gingrich for a year and who looked at thousands of pages of documents—it’s got to be pretty explosive.

So far Pelosi has twice—not once, but twice—come right out and point-blank told the country that she knows “something” about Gingrich that insures that he will never become the President of the United States. As in never, ever, it ain’t gonna happen, no way, Jose, never, nope, sorry, uh-uh.

She even said it the second time after Gingrich suggested she would face legal action for violating House rules! What does she know? And when will she spill this magical Newt-slaying salt on that slimy amphibian?

From CNN’s John King, USA:

KING:  All right, not on the past, but let’s look to the future.  You make your case, there, passionately for President Obama.  But you also understand, it’s a tough reelection climate for any president, Democrat or Republican, in this economy.
Because of your history with Speaker Gingrich, what goes through your mind when you think about the possibility, which is more real today than it was a week or a month ago, that he would be the Republican nominee and that you could come back here next January or next February with a President Gingrich?

PELOSI:  Let me just say this.  That will never happen.

KING:  Why?

PELOSI:  He’s not going to be president of the United States.  This is - that’s not going to happen.  Let me just make my prediction and stand by it.  It isn’t going to happen.

KING:  Why are you so sure?

PELOSI:  There’s something I know.  The Republicans, if they choose to nominate him, that’s the prerogative.  I don’t even think that’s going to happen.

This morning on The Today Show, Gingrich shot back: “She lives in a San Francisco environment of strange fantasies and strange understandings of reality. I have no idea what’s in Nancy Pelosi’s head. If she knows something, spit it out. Tell us what it is. I have no idea what she’s talking about.”

Still, Pelosi has promised to reveal all, “When the time’s right.”

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Newt skullfucks Mitt Romney (and Capitalism itself)

Political junkies alert: If you haven’t seen Newt Gingrich’s epic 27-minute-long violent disembowelment of Mitt Romney, When Mitt Romney Came to Town, holy shit will it will take your breath away!

I mean… WOW. I can only imagine the look on Romney’s face when he saw this puppy. He probably broke down and cried! This shit is hardcore. Reagan’s Eleventh Commandment has been repealed.

Rating the political damage this film does to Romney on a scale of one to ten with one being merely annoying and ten being castrated and then having your balls shoved down your throat for the whole world to see? When Mitt Romney Came to Town is probably an eleven or twelve. Think I’m exaggerating? See for yourself!

This has to be the single meanest, most vicious political hit piece ever made. It’s a cold, cruel masterpiece of character assassination.

It makes the worst things Lee Atwater did in his career look warm and cuddly in comparison. “Willie Horton”? That’s amateur hour compared to When Mitt Romney Came to Town.

I suppose it’s a bit disingenuous to call it “Newt’s” film because he was just the highest bidder. The film was also offered to the other campaigns—they all had their chances—but it was Gingrich, or rather the “Winning Our Future” Super PAC supporting him, that allowed Gingrich to be the one to get all Ed Gein on Romney’s ass and deliver the axe to his head.

When Mitt Romney Came to Town was directed by Jason Killian Meath, an associate of Romney’s during the 2008 Republican primary who made ads that year that were pro-Mittens. He must have seen something in Romney that he didn’t like, or maybe not. Maybe When Mitt Romney Came to Town was simply a way for Meath to cynically sell his services to the highest bidder and enrich himself personally at Romney’s expense. Loyalties can be very flexible in Washington. The film looks like it cost no more than $50k to make, but surely Jason Killian Meath was well-compensated for this expert hit. The film’s all-out annihilation of its target positions Meath nicely as the “Scaramanga” of political operatives. In the future pols from both parties will be clamoring for his services. Why hire anyone but the very best? No one else comes even close to this guy’s mad satanic skillz! He’ll burn your opponent to the fucking ground.

Truly I don’t see how Romney will be able to counter this. It’s like the box that rips your face off in Hellraiser.

The thing is, When Mitt Romney Came to Town inadvertently goes to great lengths to expose the moral and intellectual bankruptcy at the heart of today’s Tea party-led GOP: Free market Capitalism, seen in the human form of Mitt Romney and the rest of his mega-rich cronies at Bain Capital, are such hideous and loathsome creatures that the unavoidable “takeaway”—even for conservative viewers, I should point out—is that Capitalism is an evil system rigged to benefit the people at the top of the food chain and fuck over anyone who gets in their way.

The rest of us are just their food. When Mitt Romney Came to Town makes that very, very clear… even for the most dumbshit Republicans. Freedom? You think you’re free? You’re free to lose your house, health insurance and starve is what you’re free to do, according to the message of this film. It’s called “creative destruction” and Mitt Romney will tell you all about it. It’s how he made his vast fortune: from the misery of hardworking Americans. The next time you hear some asshole going on about impersonal market forces and all that blather, show them When Mitt Romney Came to Town—this is an impersonal market force that has a first name, a last name, a social security number and a street address, albeit one that’s probably behind a big gate with security guards.

But it’s not just Mitt Romney’s mouth that this film pisses in. When Mitt Romney Came to Town dramatically and clearly indicts the entire way BUSINESS is done in America.  The film is of a set with anything that Michael Moore has ever done and seems far more in tune with the Occupy Wall Street movement than anything we’d normally associate with Republicans. Who wrote the voice over script, Trotsky? Yes, I mean to tell you that When Mitt Romney Came to Town is that much of a wildcard to throw into the GOP primary. Even Ron Paul might have his doubts about the free market after viewing this one.

Ultimately, though, I don’t think this film benefits Newt Gingrich in any way. It utterly destroys Mitt Romney, true, it absolutely skullfucks him and leaves him bleeding from his anus and shivering on the ground in a fetal position, but you’d have to be an absolute idiot if the only question you had when When Mitt Romney Came to Town is over was which one of the other Republicans you were going to vote for!

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Revenge served HOT: Newt Gingrich bares his fangs!

Have you seen the excerpt yet from the film that pro-Gingrich Super PAC “Winning Our Future” bought from former Mitt Romney associate, Jason Killian Meath, the same guy who made most of the pro-Romney ads during his failed 2008 bid for the Republican nomination?

A clip a little less than 3-minutes from When Mitt Romney Came to Town is making the rounds today, but it won’t be until the GOP candidates have moved on to the South Carolina primary that the full 27-minute film will be aired on television. This one looks like it’s going to be pretty nasty, I must say.

The funny thing is, judging from the excerpt from this video, it’s not just Romney per se who gets excoriated here, Capitalism itself that doesn’t fare so well, either. I thought all Republicans were for unfettered free market economics and all that malarkey, but this video ends up making a very different case as it bludgeons Romney over the head…

“Capitalism made America great. Free markets. Innovation. Hard work. The building blocks of the American dream. But in the wrong hands, some of those dreams can turn into nightmares.”

That’s already quite apparent to many Americans.

If it takes putting big money behind what ends up seeming like an anti-capitalist message to burn Mitt Romney to the ground, I suppose that makes it all okay in Newt’s mind. I can’t see how a message like this will fail to kick the shit out of Romney in South Carolina. I don’t think it will do a damned thing for Newt’s sagging political fortunes, but then again, Gingrich himself probably suspects the same (and doesn’t give a fuck, either). He’s one mean hombre, as Romney is about to find out!

“It turns out that there are some things that if you describe them they’re negative. If you accurately describe some things they are negative,” Gingrich told Politico.

Yeah, like late-stage, predatory capitalism…

This is big fun, though, isn’t it? A Mexican stand-off with two Republicans? You gotta love it.

Since I hate both of them with equal disdain, all I can say is “My name is Richard Metzger and I approve this message” This is gonna get good.

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Newt Gingrich mind melds with psychedelic shaman Terence McKenna

Newt Gingrich falls under the spell of psychedelic pioneer Terence McKenna.

As McKenna speaks, Gingrich tries to maintain his equilibrium as subliminal broadcasts from DMT Radio (space is the place) activate the naturally occurring psychedelics (tryptamine) in Newt’s brain. Secret mystical teachings of love and peace are encoded in his nervous system for subsequent activation on 12/21/2012.

Posted by Marc Campbell | Leave a comment
Newt Gingrich heckled/chased by Occupy Des Moines

Occupy Des Moines protesters razzed Newt Gingrich at the Iowa capitol this morning, disrupting the endorsement he was about to get from from Iowa House Speaker Kraig Paulsen, before heckling and chasing Gingrich and his wife Callista out of the building.

At first a fellow named David Goodner, of Iowa Citizens for Community Improvement, yelled “mic check” but security escorted him out almost immediately. A few minutes later several people began chanting, “Put people first,” but the press conference continued and Paulsen’s endorsement was conferred.

Soon after several protesters tried to corner him Gingrich to ask questions about his position on taxes and other things, but Gingrich’s staff held then back or he’d give them curt, dismissive answers.

The group – along with several dozen media employees – followed Gingrich and his wife Callista down the stairs of the Capitol and to a vehicle that was waiting to escort them.

They yelled at Gingrich as he walked away:

“You gave me 10 seconds, sir.  What if I had a million dollars. Would I get 10 minutes? How about an hour?”

“Speaker Gingrich, you can run but you can’t hide. We’re going to come for you everywhere you go.  You can’t show your face in public without seeing us.”

“You say you don’t like super PACs. How much money are super PACs spending on your campaign right now?”

Adam Mason of CCI explained his group’s actions today by saying they have been forced to result to disruptions since politicians won’t listen to their concerns.

“Speaker Gingrich and politicians like him have had deaf ears towards the concerns of everyday folks for too long,” Mason said. “That’s why the tea party stood up and that’s why Occupy has stood up and that’s why we continue to have to raise our voices to get them to listen.”

Keep it up folks, these bastards need to understand where you’re comin’ from… Hopefully more footage will surface of this incident as the day goes on.

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Evil troll: Newt Gingrich wants to speed up America’s race to the bottom

Taking current GOP front-runner, Newt Gingrich—and his plan to put inner city children to work as janitors—to task, Crooks and Liars managing editor Tina Dupuy writes of her own experiences working as a child janitor for the princely wage of $4.25 an hour (she made $75 a week before tax!). As Dupuy writes, it’s not that America’s poor children need jobs to discipline them and to make them better workers, it’s that the jobs need to be better for America’s adults!

Full disclosure: I, too, worked as a janitor at a municipal park in West Virginia at the age of 14 and made this exact same wage. I don’t really think it harmed me in any way. In fact, I wanted to do it so I was able to buy punk rock records, marijuana and LSD, but that’s not the point here: It’s that apparently Newt Gingrich thinks that America’s adult workforce should be competing with their own children for jobs that pay a third world wage.

Why isn’t it being framed like that in the media? It seems so obvious, doesn’t it?

You’d have to be a fucking Republican to believe such nonsense…

Now 49 million Americans live in poverty – with 2.6 million falling into the category last year. That’s 16 percent of Americans. There are more Americans living in poverty than there are Canadians on the planet.

Gingrich is trying to equate poverty with a moral shortcoming. It’s a warped offshoot of the prosperity gospel – riches are a sign of god’s love – poverty is a sign of his indifference.

But also in this richer-and-therefore-holier-than-thou diatribe of Gingrich’s is an attempt to bust unions. He suggested firing union janitors to hire children to clean their own schools. Yes, a janitor with a job that pays him enough to live on is, in Gingrich’s eyes, a problem. In the call for hiring children and ending child labor laws is the call to end working for a living.

All the anchors of a middle-class living (pensions, benefits, decent salaries) are being dubbed “luxuries” by Republicans, to be sacrificed so magical “job creators” can be cajoled into saving us all.

Because, really, the greatest threat to America is that janitors are paid too much. Please. Wealthy janitors are, to borrow Gingrich’s phrase, “an invented people.”

Gingrich has a dark vision for a Shining City Upon a Hill: where poor children work in place of union labor. It’s basically the 20th century played in reverse.

Working (even scrubbing toilets) should mean making a living. If someone who works is still eligible for food stamps and government assistance – it’s really the employer who is federally subsidized. These “job creators” are taking advantage of government programs so they won’t have to cut into their profit margins to pay living wages.

The best example of this is also the biggest private employer in the country: Walmart.

If Newt and his Republican same-thinks want to go after Welfare Queens and those who don’t value work – go after the Walmart heirs. According to economist Sylvia Allegretto in 2007 the six Walmart heirs own more than the bottom 30 percent of Americans. And that was four years ago when their wealth was estimated at $69.7 billion, now it’s thought to be around $93 billion.

KA-POW. ‘Nuff said.

And this evil piece of shit is the Republican front runner!

On point, it’s hardly because GOP primary voters are rejecting Mitt Romney for a more conservative candidate: They just want someone MEANER!

Confessions of a Child Janitor (Crooks and Liars)

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
Newt Gingrich: ‘Kim Kardashian of the GOP’ (or its John Edwards???)
08:18 pm


Newt Gingrich
Kim Kardashian
John Edwards


“If Newt Gingrich can betray a woman who swore her loyalty to him for the rest of her life—not once but TWICE—what makes you think he won’t betray you, the faceless voter in a sea of faceless voters?”

That question is asked at the conclusion of a blistering viral video critique of Gingrich that an Iowa pastor named Cary Gordon is making sure gets around. From the LA Times:

Gordon is sending the video via text message to every registered Republican or non-aligned Iowa voter with a cellphone on record. He says it is necessary because Gingrich’s favorability rating among Iowa Christians “keeps going up and up.”

Gordon, who leads the 1,000-member Cornerstone Church in Sioux City, Iowa, says he feels he must speak out against Gingrich because “he terrifies me” as a potential leader without a strong moral compass.

You an’ me, both, Rev, but don’t get me wrong, I think Molotov Mitchell, the homophobic birther who made this video (and plenty of others) for WorldNetDaily, is a complete fuckwit and his presence here on DM is in no way an endorsement of his lame reactionary shtick, still I must admit to, uh, agreeing with a lot of this one.

As surprising as it is that I concur with something (in bold strokes) that Molotov Mitchell came up with, I guess one thing about Newton Leroy Gingrich that that can be said with absolute certitude is that he brings Americans of EVERY DEMOGRAPHIC together!

It occurred to me watching this that Gingrich is actually a lot closer to being “THE JOHN EDWARDS OF THE GOP” than its Kim Kardashian, although that one’s pretty on target, too, of course. Ponder for a second what sort of damage it would do to Gingrich’s campaign if a meme comparing him to the universally loathed two-time Democratic presidential candidate and former senator gained traction in Iowa?

I mean on an axis of adultery, cancer and extreme narcissism, Gingrich and John Edwards are two peas in the same morally bankrupt pod, aren’t they?

Odd that none of Newt’s GOP opponents have decided to run with an Edwards/Gingrich comparison. But, hey, if any of them want it, they can have it for free!

Posted by Richard Metzger | Leave a comment
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