I sincerely hope there is a video camera trained on Robert Fitzpatrick’s fool face when he wakes up alive—and broke—next Sunday morning. From The New York Daily News:

Robert Fitzpatrick is so convinced the end is near he’s betting his life savings on it.

The retired MTA employee has pumped $140,000 into a NYC Transit ad campaign to warn everyone the world will end next Saturday.

“Global Earthquake! The Greatest Ever - Judgment Day: May 21,” the ad declares above a placid picture of night over Jerusalem with a clock that’s about to strike midnight.

“I’m trying to warn people about what’s coming,” the 60-year-old Staten Island resident said. “People who have an understanding [of end times] have an obligation to warn everyone.”

His doomsday warning has appeared on 1,000 placards on subway cars, at a cost of $90,000, and at bus shelters around the city, for $50,000 more. Fitzpatrick’s millenial mania began after he retired in 2006 and began listening to California evangelist Harold Camping’s “end of days” predictions.

Using head-spinning numerological calculations, Camping has determined that the world will end on Saturday, May 21. He’s used similar biblical math to pinpoint when Abraham was circumcised (2068 B.C.) and when earth was created (11,083 B.C.).

Camping has predicted the end of world once before - on Sept. 6, 1994. When the sun rose on Sept. 7, Camping admitted he might have had that one wrong.

Still, Fitzpatrick remains convinced the beginning of the end is coming next week.

“It’ll start just before midnight, Jerusalem time: It’ll be instantaneous and global,” he said. “There are too many scriptures talking about ‘sudden destruction.’”

While Jesus Christ returns to Earth and all non-believers burn in eternal hellfire, Fitzpatrick says he and all those in the know will be saved in the rapture.

Yeah, well… let’s see who’s laughing come Sunday when Robert realizes that he gave his retirement money back to the place he worked for his entire life! I hope he still thinks this was money well spent, but I sorta doubt it…

“My sister doesn’t believe it,” Fitzpatrick admits. “I’ve tried to tell her. But that’s pretty much the story with most people.”

That should have been your first fucking clue, Robert.

 
Christian talkshow It’s Supernatural! welcomes guest, Michael Brown, author of A Queer Thing Happened to America.

“No major publisher, secular or EVEN CHRISTIAN, was willing to publish it!”

Few watching this will wonder why!

“Is this the course that nations take just before their final destruction?” asks Sid Roth, the host of this idiotic pukefest.

Good question, Sidney! The answer is YES, but not for the reasons you think it is, pal…
 

 
Via On Knees for Jesus

 
Crazy Christian teenagers pray for Obama (a secret Muslim, or so they heard via an ALL CAPS EMAIL, no doubt) to convert to Christianity by a laying of hands on a life-size Obama cardboard stand-up! Extraordinary! The most stunning display of superstition and ignorance I’ve seen in quite some time (not that this is any sort of accomplishment).
 

 
Via On Knees for Jesus