This is a whole lotta WTF? A hefty dollop of WHY? And a big ol’ helping of “OH DEAR ME…” This is so wrong. What the hell am I watching?
No, it’s not a scene cut out of Spike Lee’s Bamboozled. But it could be! This televised “talent” competition is called Your Face Sounds Familiar where you get to dress up as your favorite performer and impersonate them. How weird is it that a.) the producers said “Sure, why not?” to a minstrel act? and b.) that she was applauded instead of booed or laughed off the stage?
Oh shit. What would Stevie say if… oh never mind. You gotta see it to believe it, I suppose.
I shit you not. Apparently the G8 leaders and their entourages are such delicate flowers that they can’t bear to see the effect of the global recession on the towns they drive through, such as upcoming host Enniskillen in Northern Ireland.
Local councils in Northern Ireland have painted fake shop fronts and covered derelict buildings with huge billboards to hide the economic hardship being felt in towns and villages near the golf resort where G8 leaders will meet this month.
Northern Ireland’s government has spent £2m (€2.3m) tackling dereliction over the past two years, the environment department said. Some buildings have been demolished and others have been given a facelift in an attempt to make areas more attractive.
Almost a quarter of “dereliction funds” were freed up for local councillors in Co Fermanagh in anticipation of Britain hosting the annual Group of Eight leaders’ summit there on 17-18 June. More than 100 properties have been spruced up. In the one-street town of Belcoo, the changes are merely cosmetic.
At a former butcher’s shop, stickers applied to the windows show a packed meat counter and give the impression that business is booming. Across the street, another empty unit has been given a makeover to look like a thriving office supply shop.
Locals are unimpressed. “The shop fronts are cosmetic surgery for serious wounds. They are looking after the banks instead of saving good businesses,” said Kevin Maguire, 62, an unemployed man who has lived all his life in Belcoo.
This isn’t sexy! Who would think this is enticing?
I’m still trying to wrap my head around this one. Here goes: A 35-year-old Swedish man—who is only being named as Hasse—was found dead on his farm outside Ystad after making sweet, sweet love to a hornet’s nest.
His body was found by a neighbour, who said Hasse was so swollen he initially mistook him for a whale carcass.
Hasse was unconscious when he was found but died an hour later from the injuries he sustained.
An autopsy of Hasse’s body showed semen on some of the dead wasps and a number of the victim’s pubic hair was found at the entrance of the nest. His fingerprints were also found on the nest, leading the police to believe he had been trying to have sex with the hornet’s nest when he was stung to death.
“To attempt to have intercourse with a hornet’s nest is a very bad idea,” Siv During Livh, a psychologist and expert on sex fantasies told the news website.
What the hell did I just watch??? Prepare to have your mind blown… or an epileptic seizure.
I’m assuming this is some type of Estonian TV competition show similar to America’s Got Talent? I could be wrong. I have no idea. But what I do know is: I’ve NEVER seen anything quite like this before. It’s a new genre! (Right?)
The tally of children killed by unmanned combat air vehicles from the United States officially stands at 178 (and let’s be honest, it’s probably higher); so why haven’t we yet commemorated this new, highly effective war technology with a cuddly plush toy?
Thankfully, Café Press shop, The Air Force Store, has it covered with the “UAV Battlelab Teddy Bear”:
Our plush bear is a cutie in his own message-bearing t-shirt and festive red and blue ribbons. Here’s a great gift for Valentine’s Day, baby showers, birthdays, get well-wishes, a pair of wedding bears, or any reason you dream up. Put a smile on someone’s face. Just grin and bear it!
IN LATE 60’S I DISCOVERED I COULD BREATH UNDER WATER WITHOUT EQUIPMENT.
1-DRINK ONE BEER (MAY NOT BE REQUIRED)
2-JUMP INTO DEEP END OF POOL
3-EXHALE ALL AIR AS YOU ARE GOING DOWN
4-SIT ON FLOOR OF POOL
5-GRIT TEETH AND LIPS
6-SLOWLY SUCK AIR THRU LIPS AND TEETH.
WARNING…NOT FOR MINORS
MAYBE SOMEONE CAN FORWARD THIS TO THE NAVY SEALS AND PERHAPS AFTER THEY FIND SOMEONE WHO CAN DUPLICATE THIS CAN INVENT A MOUTHPIECE THAT ACTUALLY IS SEPARATING OUT THE AIR (HYDROGEN AND OXYGEN) FROM THE WATER ENABLING MILITARY TO BREATH UNDERWATER WITH NO TANKS ECT. SORT OF A FISH GILL FOR THE MOUTH. IT IS NOTED THE POOL ALSO CONTAINED CHLORINE ..THE POOL WAS IN HOLLYWOOD CALIF.
INCIDENTLY…I NEVER BREATH DEEPLY ANYWAY…JUST KIND OF USE THE MINIMUM
NOT EVERYONE CAN DO IT I GUESS. YOU WERE BRAVE TO TRY THO
also i plan to live to 200 years….sounds strange…but i believe you can do what you believe.
You are welcome. I thought i was the only one in the world….how old are you?
do you plan to demonstrate this to the public? maybe to news shows? what area do you live in?
What are your other abilities?.....i may have others that i just take for granite thinking everyone can.
Mr billy Im sorry that you got critisized for telling people about a very unique talent which most are not equipped to handle. If you have any other odd things that you can do or understand that others never have the I would gladly like to compare and share for I have others as well.. and as I stated about races.. I believe people like you and I are in a whole nother league then most of all we know. Take care of yourself old man.. thank you for sharing or else I would have never know I was it.
A postcard written last month from Charles Manson to Marilyn Manson:
To Marilyn Manson –
It’s taken me a long time to get there from where I could touch M. Manson. Now I got a card to play – you may look into my non-profit, ATWA, and give Manson what you think he’s got coming for Air, Trees, Water, and you. Or I will pay Manson what you think Manson got coming – the music has make Manson into Abraxas Devil, and I’m SURE you would want some of what I got from what I got. It’s a far out balance. Beyond good and bad, right, wrong. What you don’t do is what I will do – what you did a sing-along, and let it roll and said how you saved me a lot of steps – I don’t need, it’s not a need or a want. Couped – coup. Ghost dancers slay together and you’re just in my grave Sunstroker Corona-coronas-coronae – you seen me from under with it all standing on me. That’s 2 dump trucks – doing the same as CMF 000007
I can’t comment because I have no fucking clue what this means…
What fresh madness is this? Well, apparently it’s the Japanese version of Rickrolling, “switch and bait” trolling using footage from American gay wrestling porn instead of Rick Astley, and it has been a relatively popular meme over there for the last few years.
As you can imagine from that description, it’s pretty fucking nuts. And very NSFW.
Much of this “wrestling series” stars a guy called Billy Herrington, who has become such a cult figure in Japan that a doll has been made in his honour (above, part of the “panty edition”.) You may have seen some of these kinds of clips before, in particular a 3D computer graphic version of Herrinton riding a clone of himself like a Segway, chasing after a guy on a steamroller, and thought “what the fuck am I watching?” Well, friends, wonder no more, thanks to the folks at Know Your Meme (Herrington also has his own Wiki page with more info.)
Here’s a great example of the wrestling series, an edit of a film called Bayollante, supposedly a parody of Bayonette. Even though this is completely made up, I love this quasi-review-cum-description by YouTube commenter skidreckums:
With a palette of visual effects that would make James Cameron blush and some of the most bone-crunching sound effects to be found outside of a Jell-O factory, Bayollante 4 leaves little to be imagined or desired by anyone lucky enough to stumble across this gem in their local video store’s import bargain bin. Fans of Bart Howard’s 1954 vocal jazz standard, Fly Me to the Moon, will also appreciate the subtle yet fully modern remix heading the otherwise brutal soundtrack. I’d be lying if I didn’t tell you that SEGAY really has outdone themselves this time. Just writing this review has gotten me wondering if I will ever be able to water my motorcycle with peace of mind again. The great thing about watching Bayollante 4 - Trillion Real Handguns isn’t seeing the beefcakes smack each other down with colorful energy attacks and hard gay magical summons, it’s showing everyone online that I did. It’s official, I’ll never be able to watch anything else again.
Bayollante - Stylish Gay Wrestling (in Japanese) - NSFW: