Still trying to live up to his reputation as Glenn Beck, on his program today Glenn Beck insisted that it was really “Marxist revolutionaries” in the Obama administration who were causing national parks and monuments to be shuttered during the GOP-led government shutdown.
Despite knowing fully well which party was to blame for the shutdown, Beck blamed Obama anyway, spinning a yarn about “a secret cabal” in the White House whose goal is to “inflict pain” on Americans.
“I want you to understand you are now seeing what I told you about three weeks ago. I told you they have gone from nudge to shove. Your next step is shoot.”
“Understand they are into shove, every Marxist communist revolution always ends with millions dead. Always, without fail, every time.”
Somehow Beck equates Stalinist and Maoist atrocities to the Washington Monument being closed down temporarily and a supposed starvation endgame of the Obama administration:
“They starved them to death. Why? To teach them a lesson. This is the beginning of teaching the American people a lesson: don’t you screw with us.”
Oddly, considering his animus for the “Marxist” President, at the clips end, Beck admonished his listeners to support his “Defund the GOP” campaign before “it will be too late.”
Seems like odd logic, but it’s Glenn Beck so why bother asking why?
How senile would you have to be to willingly choose to tune into Glenn Beck’s radio show??? His audience must have a collective IQ of approximately one peanut… The folks at Rightwing Watch, they at least get paid for this torture!
Dignity, schmignity! Who am I kidding, the man is shameless! Watch in slack-jawed boredom as Glenn Beck interviews himself, in a kind of idiotic (or demented, if you prefer) Swedish Chef impression.
Glenn Beck lost his mind (and the vast majority of his audience and influence) a while ago, but has Beck the showman lost his mojo, too?
He’s not even trying here. Well, he’s trying to take up airtime, I guess, but not much else. I can’t imagine too many people, not even stupid ones, would subscribe to this, or continue their subscriptions if this was the quality of the programming they would receive for their hard-earned dough. There aren’t enough hours in the day and this doesn’t even rise to the occasion of lame.
Papa’s got a brand new conspiracy theory: Glenn Beck, the teary-eyed, former alcoholic Mormon “patriot” and multi-millionaire conspiracy theory media mogul believes (or, rather, *ahem*, says he believes) himself to be the target of, what else, a conspiracy to call him a conspiracy theorist.
It sounds like I am making this up. I am not making this up. Via Raw Story:
Conspiracy talk radio host Glenn Beck [see what he did there?] said Tuesday that he isn’t sure why he’s been labeled a conspiracy theorist in the media, but he’s pretty sure it’s the result of a “concentrated effort” somehow coordinated by the White House.
Building on his theory that CNN secretly orchestrated an incredibly awkward moment between host Wolf Blitzer and an atheist survivor of the Oklahoma tornadoes, Beck told listeners on Tuesday that it’s just another example of the media’s conspiracy to push a hidden agenda, in this case atheism.
“The media has their own agenda,” he said of CNN. “And if the media has a storyline, it just writes it in. And currently the storyline is ‘conspiracy theorist.’” Then, without irony, he asked: “Why is it a concentrated effort now to label me a conspiracy theorist?”
Fantabulosa! The man surely knows how to enthrall his audience of cud-chewing cows, does he not? They subscribe to this shit, baby! Pay the man a monthly fee to put stupid ideas in their heads. It’s genius, the best gimmick for separating fools from their money since televangelism or Scientology!
Glenn Beck is so gangsta, motherfucker, countin’ those stacks o’ Benjamins!
There’s a fantastic new—at least I think it’s pretty new—sub-reddit section that’s a catchall for some of the more idiotic conspiracy theories out there. Titled ‘Conspiratards,’ for the most part, the forum consists of postings debunking the willy-nilly fever dream dot-connecting of Glenn Beck, Alex Jones, the 9-11 truthers, birthers, LaRouchites, Tea partiers, Ron Paul fanboys and David Icke. If you are so inclined, it’s a fucking laugh riot.
Special Note: Conspiratards hate free speech and religiously down-mod good submissions here, so be sure to check out the “controversial” submissions that they don’t want you to see!
When you talk about conspiracy theories, there are, of course, REAL conspiracies and crimes—things which can be proven in a court of law and that actually happened historically (Watergate and the Iran Contra scandal come immediately to mind) and then there’s the utter lunatic bullshit that Alex Jones propagates on his radio show, the Montauk Project book series and Brice Taylor, the self-proclaimed mind-controlled sex slave of Bob Hope, the CIA and Henry Kissinger). When you get down to the “lizard people” level, I’m not sure what value these empty mental calories provide as a part of one’s intellectual diet, but from a sociological viewpoint, it’s fascinating to gawk at the loopy things that some people are willing to believe, absent any proof other than a sweaty, obnoxious fat guy shouting that it’s all a big government cover-up (A pic of Alex Jones looking suitably barking mad is the Conspiratards’ mascot).
I’ve watched as the conspiracy theory subculture degenerated from serious, yet unorthodox, inquiry and investigative journalism (the high point was the late 80s, early 90s when zine culture still flourished) to the mentally unstable jabberwocky of Jones, the Fox News reichwing propaganda machine and the smirking, immature fratboy fascists at Breitbart we have today. It’s gone from fascinating to pathetic and there’s a world of distance between the likes of a great, non-conformist mind such as Mae Brussell or her disciple Dave Emory, and a bi-polar paranoid numbskull like Alex Jones.
Because of the popularity of Disinformation, which launched in 1996 when the Internet was still a new thing to most people, I was often asked to comment on conspiracy theories on television shows and newscasts from all over the world. Out of “nowhere” these “theories” appeared to be gaining a level of acceptability in the culture, and this seemed to alarm traditional journalists and so they would have someone like me—or Jonathan Vankin, author of Conspiracies, Cover-Ups and Crimes, still the definitive book on conspiracy theorists) explain it for their listeners, viewers or readers. Both Jonathan and myself were bemused onlookers, not true believers in any way, so we tended to be the “go to” guys for that stuff back then.
I was always asked these two questions, or some variation thereof: “Have you ever investigated a conspiracy theory that you were skeptical of, only to find that you ultimately came to believe it?” (“No,” is the very short answer) and they also always wanted to know how the general public would be able to tell shit from shinola in this brave new Internet era…
This was the trickier question to answer, but to a large extent, I’d give the same answer today as I did fifteen years ago: “If it sounds like something they already believe, and it’s presented with a certain level of slickness, be it a professional TV graphics package, or good web design, then a certain segment of the population probably will believe it—fervently—and there’s not a lot that can done about it.”
I’ve had TV hosts gasp when I said that, but I wasn’t trying to imply—certainly not—that Lyndon LaRouche’s website would be on equal footing with The New York Times, but I was on the record several times back then predicting that “The Paranoid Style in American Politics,” as defined by Richard Hofstadter in his famous 1964 essay of the same title, would become very popular in the coming decade as a form of entertainment.
It’s not about the John Birch Society-type ideas, or those of Glenn Beck’s idol, W. Cleon Skousen, per se—they’ve been languishing in the background for 50-60 years—but the slicker presentation of these kinds of ideas in a wide-open, low barrier to entry mediaverse that is seeing them flourish and gain traction in a way that never could have been imagined when Hofstadter wrote his essay. Today what used to be the fringe is the mainstream.
Consider the right wing “bubble” that the Mitt Romney campaign and the GOP were accused of living in during the 2012 election. If Breitbart.com looked like Free Republic, it’s doubtful that it would carry the same weight in the minds of conservatives as the freaking New York Times, if you take the point, but to many on the right, it DOES have the same value, a fact that came out repeatedly in the election post-mortems. Breitbart? WTF?
Then there’s Fox News. Imagine how threadbare that network would appear without the slick motion graphics and the blonde newscasters? It would frankly look just like the Alex Jones podcast without the Fox-y ladies and professional art directors. Ever noticed how few live reports Fox does? Local newscasts get out of the studio more often than Fox does and many times, they’re using the same feeds as CNN, perhaps even licensing these feeds from their competitor. It looks like a news network and has all of the trappings and outer appearance of one, but is it really news that Fox offers its elderly viewers in between all of the Gold Bond powder and MedicAlert commercials?
In any case, my perception of the Conspiratards sub-reddit forum is that it represents (by its explicitly mocking name and irreverent attitude) a really, really interesting new development in conspiracy theory culture. Not merely a “get your head out of your ass, dude” place to vent, it’s actually a place where even the folks who troll it will inevitably get a dose of counter reality that will bounce off the back of their heads like a basketball of logic.
I can understand why people are Glenn Beck fans or Alex Jones diehards, but it doesn’t mean I have any respect for how their tiny minds process and evaluate information sources. Conspiratards on reddit looks to promote a modern—and necessary—form of media literacy, no more, no less. The educational system might be failing us, but take heart that we can still teach each other something.
He gets a little blackboard and draws out a pathetic syllogism
Hitler was a vegetarian
Many liberals are vegetarians
Hitler killed Jews
Ergo: Liberals killed 6 000 000 Jews
And suddenly all of his pea-brained followers are running out to buy guns and ammo over the realization that liberals and Nazis are really the same.
Glenn Beck—the guy’s fuckin’ nuts and his audience are drooling idiots—but he’s still quite the showman, I’ll give him that. Notice how well his show is directed (a big improvement over the production values of his Fox News show). His camera operator must be the best in the business.
When Glenn Beck started his online network, The Blaze, one of his stated intentions was to find the Jon Stewart of conservatives.
Predictably, any attempts to bring the funny to The Blaze have fallen way, way short, but finally, at long last, one of his talents—writer/comic/voice-over guy Brian Sack, host of BS of A—actually has produced something that is as funny as something you might see on The Daily Show—no really—but the problem is, it’s Glenn Beck’s megalomania and completely batshit bad craziness (not to mention the gullibility of his idiot fanbase) that provides the ripe target for Sack’s pointed satire.
Sack really sticks it to him.
To his credit, Beck must have found this funny, but at the same time, it really does mock him mercilessly and make him—and his biggest fans—look like a total asshole! There’s no pretense here, is there?
None dare call him a “cult leader”: Who says Glenn Beck is just an ordinary megalomaniac? Oh Sweet Jesus… last week Beck gave his audience a look at what’s been rattling around in his feverish noggin’ lately: He wants his own city! Beck even has a name already picked out for his proposed “visionary” hybrid amusement park cum Libertarian city dream project: “Independence, USA” (for what else could he call it? “America, USA”?)
Taking his cues from Ayn Rand (Beck says Independence will be his very own “Galt’s Gulch”), Walt Disney and the survivalist movement, Beck is proposing his city-theme park (to be built in Texas) to be a fabled land where all of his empire’s interests—live events, stores, educational projects, charity, entertainment, news, and technology R&D—would come together in one place. American ideals of hard work, personal responsibility, and freedom would form the bedrock of Beck’s fantasy separatist city.
They would, of course, grow their own food there. Schools would “deprogram” students under the guidance of Christian “historian” David Barton! Politicians could visit Glenn’s very own city “to learn the truth” (Beck’s words, not mine).
Did L. Ron Hubbard himself ever have such grandiose plans? (Oh, yeah, he had his sights fixed on being the king of Rhodesia).
The ambitious project, projected to cost over two billion dollars, has been heavily influenced by Walt Disney. As Glenn has been explaining throughout the week, Disneyland was originally intended to be a place where people would find happiness, inspiration, courage and hope. Over time, Walt Disney’s original vision has been lost. While hundreds of thousands still flock to the town, it’s become commercialized and the big dreams and the heart have been compromised.
Glenn believes that he can bring the heart and the spirit of Walt’s early Disneyland ideas into reality. Independence, USA wouldn’t be about rides and merchandise, but would be about community and freedom. The Marketplace would be a place where craftmen (sic) and artisan (sic) open and run real small businesses and stores. The owners and tradesmen could hold apprenticeships and teach young people the skills and entrepreneurial spirit that has been lost in today’s entitlement state.
There would also be an (sic) Media Center, where Glenn’s production company would film television, movies, documentaries, and more. Glenn hoped to include scripted television that would challenge viewers without resorting to a loss of human decency. He also said it would be a place where aspiring journalists would learn how to be great reporters.
Across the lake, there would be a church modelled (sic) after The Alamo which would act as a multi-denominational mission center. The town will also have a working ranch where visitors can learn how to farm and work the land.
Independence would also be home to a Research and Development center where people would come to learn, innovate, educate, and create. There would be a theme park for people to recharge and have fun with their families.
People would also have the option to live in Independence, with a residential area where people of different incomes could all come together and be neighbors.
That last bit is probably the most outlandish part of the whole thing. In the video, Beck makes a curious aside about the reason why mansion dwellers don’t want to live next door to the poor in the trailer park because, well, it would just look weird. Of course, he’s got a plan to fix all that and rich and poor will live side by side in Glenn Beckistan!
In any case, Beck and his real estate developer buddies might want to start with building just a few of the more modestly priced homes first, and then try to gauge how much interest the wealthy might have in living side by side with his less successful in life fans before they go all in. I mean, can you fucking imagine???
As one wag quipped at TPM, “Atlas puked”! That about sums it up.
There has to be a documentary made about this!!! If it ever happens, of course. Let’s hope it does so we’ll know where they all live and can keep an eye on them. Don’t miss the brain-addled comments on Beck’s site. Howdy neighbors!
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If you can’t help yourself, catch the rest at The Blaze.
In which the loony former television personality decides to do something “controversial,” as reported on his own website, The Blaze:
The idea, for Beck however, is not to be untoward, but through irony, to highlight the hypocrisy of those who would shout in defiance at defacing the image of a sitting U.S. president, but not that of an image so sacred to Christianity — the world’s largest religion.
Beck’s piece is titled “Obama in Pee-Pee” and he says it’s for sale at $25,000. Beck admitted that it was not his own celebrity whiz in the container, but just some beer.
The clip is painful to watch, although I will admit to LOLing when Beck referred to his “home-brewed ‘Country Time.’”
If you really want to burrow deep into the brain-damaged Bizzaro World rabbit hole of the most “out there,” batshit crazy conspiracy theories currently making the rounds, “Agenda 21,” is zooming to the top of the charts with a bullet among the tin foil hat set… and beyond.
That’s right, Agenda 21 is going mainstream, baby!
Agenda 21 is actually (sort of) a real thing, a non-mandatory proposed declaration pertaining to sustainable development first introduced at the 1992 UN Conference on Environment and Development (UNCED) held in Rio de Janeiro. It has never been ratified by the US Senate, but despite this, lunatics on the fringes of the far right (and at least one group identifying itself as a Democrat-leaning subset) think it is the most nefarious globalist plot ever hatched to steal away our American birthrights and freedom and shit. Or something.
Agenda 21 is a fairly fluid, one-size-fits-all conspiracy theory, like HAARP, and can be called upon to enforce imaginary, at zero risk of happening things like mandatory birth control and involuntary sterilization (and sometimes just the opposite), Soylent Green-style euthanasia of old people and the forcible rounding up of country folk who will be made to live in cities and give up their cars.
To the fruitcakes propagating these theories—Glenn Beck and Rep. Michele Bachmann of Minnesota, come to mind on the right, as well as less ideologically categorizable sources such as David Icke and Alex Jones—“sustainable development” is just some BS “New World Order” code-word for “UN control” and of course, the bogeyman of Socialism (or at least whatever that term currently means to folks on the right).
Where an unsophisticated, buffoonish belief system like this becomes a problem is when a gang of aging low IQ baby boomers—the kind who believe in ACORN plots, birtherism and tax cuts for oligarchs—get riled up by Glenn Beck and decide that anything dubbed “sustainable,” mentioning “smart growth,” “climate change” or god forbid, cutting down on pollution or trying to preserve the environment, must mean it’s a plot against freedom, the Founding Fathers and Jeebus and so they turn up at local zoning hearings to shout down rational discussion with their paranoiac drivel and drown out sane people.
Ecologically sustainable development = NWO “they’re coming to take our freedom away” dog whistle. But of course! Of course!
Even worse the same dum-dums who joined the Tea party and who think Glenn Beck’s “eureka!” moments represent profound moments of deep undercover revelations about the evil leftwing puppet masters who want to destroy America—and not just some asshole shooting his mouth off shilling shit to the rubes—are getting themselves elected to local and state positions in growing numbers in red states. The state legislatures in Alabama, Kansas and Tennessee have approved resolutions blocking Agenda 21—which was never ratified, I remind you—from ever being implemented in their states. Not that there’s much of a danger of that ever occurring…
On October 11, at a closed-door meeting of the Republican caucus convened by the body’s majority leader, Chip Rogers, a tea party activist told Republican lawmakers that Obama was mounting this most diabolical conspiracy. The event—captured on tape by a member of the Athens-based watchdog Better Georgia (who was removed from the room after 52 minutes)—had been billed as an information session on Agenda 21, a nonbinding UN agreement that commits member nations to promote sustainable development. In the eyes of conservative activists, Agenda 21 is a nefarious plot that includes forcibly relocating non-urban-dwellers and prescribing mandatory contraception as a means of curbing population growth. The invitation to the Georgia state Senate event noted the presentation would explain: “How pleasant sounding names are fostering a Socialist plan to change the way we live, eat, learn, and communicate to ‘save the earth.’”
The meeting consisted of a PowerPoint presentation followed by a 90-minute screening of the anti-Agenda 21 documentary, Agenda: Grinding America Down. It was emceed by Field Searcy, a local conservative activist who was forced out of the Georgia Tea Party in April due to his endorsement of conspiracy theories about the president’s birth certificate and the collapse of World Trade Center Tower 7. The presentation also featured a special video cameo from conservative talking-head Dick Morris in which the former Clinton aide warns that Obama “wants to force everyone into the cities from whence our ancestors fled.”
About 23 minutes into the briefing, Searcy explained how President Obama, aided by liberal organizations like the Center for American Progress and business groups like local chambers of commerce, are secretly using mind-control techniques to push their plan for forcible relocation on the gullible public:
“They do that by a process known as the Delphi technique. The Delphi technique was developed by the Rand Corporation during the Cold War as a mind-control technique. It’s also known as “consensive process.” But basically the goal of the Delphi technique is to lead a targeted group of people to a pre-determined outcome while keeping the illusion of being open to public input.”
Mother Jones also had a simply marvelous screen shot from Field Searcy’s Powerpoint presentation:
Georgia Senate Majority Leader Chip Rogers hosts a public meeting of top GOP Senate leaders to discuss Obama-related conspiracy theories.
Glenn Beck explains “Agenda” 21 in his very special way:
Oh wait, what’s this?Only the most fucking genius commercial of all time: It’s for Glenn Beck’s new novel, Agenda 21, and I haven’t seen a version, yet, that wasn’t videotaped off a television screen, so I’m wondering if it’s meant to look like this? I think it’s much better if that was intentional…
Glenn Beck has launched his own brand of jeans, 1791 Denim. They only went on the market 2 days ago, but they’ve already sold out despite the $130 price tag. I’d go into more detail about the ideology of Glenn Beck’s blue jeans, but the commercial really speaks for itself.
If you’re perceptive to the subtlest of thematic symbolism, you’ll notice it has it all: nationalist imagery, nostalgia for some mythic time period when people and things were apparently better because of work ethic or some bullshit, a noble, industrious white dude, and the romanticization of really arduous labor! The spot even demonstrates the classic hypocritical boner for “American-made” products, while Beck himself still promotes a free market that favors outsourcing on his radio show.
The final line asserts that in America, you may not get the chance to succeed, but by gum, you have the chance to try, dammit! And in the end, the guy builds a giant phallic symbol that beats the Russians to the moon! USA! USA! USA!
Conservative talk show host Glenn Beck says that GOP hopeful Mitt Romney’s poll numbers have fallen as a part of a plan from God to make it obvious to the American people that divine intervention was responsible when Republicans take the White House in November.
“I know Mitt Romney wasn’t your first choice, nor was he mine,” Beck recently told controversial “historian” David Barton in a video clip highlighted by Right Wing Watch on Monday. “I am to the point that — A — God is trying to make this so clear to us that if it happens, it’s his finger. Because nothing looks good.”
“And yet, everybody I know who I consider a spiritual giant feels good,” he continued. “And it bothers me that I feel good because, I’m like, there’s no reason that I should feel good on this.”
Laugh all you want, but if Romney—who is behind in all nine battleground states according to the most recent polls—does manage to squeak out a win in November, it would indeed be a good argument for the existence of God. But what if he loses? Would this mean there is no God or that God is a Democrat or what? When Romney loses it seems like it might be a tad traumatizing for Beck and Barton, don’t you think, after watching this?
Now of course Beck won’t be held accountable for these ridiculous statements after the election. No one will even recall that he made them in the first place.
Progressive POS. Have fun burning in Hell for eternity. — Red Meat
Good people don’t promote laws that will directly lead to the death of millions, hope someday I get to spit on his grave. — Swampy
So long Andy [smiley emoticon] You are a total sell out to this great nation. You are a communist piece of garbage and you will not be missed. — Truthbeliever2
Sadly, my first thought when I saw the headline was “if he’d passed away at age 82 I would have missed him so much more” … Now, I only feel angry the old shill didn‘t live another year or two so he’d have to face a “death panel” before kicking it. The old bastrd died too soon to reap what he helped sow. I feel cheated that we’ll never get to hear him lament his decision to be a wh0re for the socialist DNC. — Wool-Free Vision
Another dead Democrat…today’s shaping up to be a better day than expected. — teddrunk
America’s sheriff? Maybe he was Maryberry’s, but Arpaio is America’s sheriff!!!! — catholicextremist
The guy that was the spokes person for Obamacare dies 1 week after it is upheld, 1 and counting. — Love The Kids
I had hoped that he would live long enough to be denied the healthcare that he helped shove down America’s throat. — Posterchild
So how did that Maobamacare you were pimping a couple of years ago work out for ya? Gee did the death panels keep you waiting too long? — Sweetrae
Ever see a lib blog after one of ours dies? Ever seen the unbridled filth and hatred in which they roll around like pigs? I for one am sick and tired of playing nice with commies. We will never win if we continue to allow them to play by different rules.
IF ANDY GRIFFITH, DEAD, IS THIS CONTROVERSIAL TO THESE ASSHATS, SERIOUSLY ASK YOURSELF: HOW MUCH LONGER CAN THE MIDDLE HOLD???
Below, evil communist pinko—and probably SECRETL KENYAN socialist dogfucker—Andy Griffith “betraying the country” in a 2010 ad promoting healthcare reform:
Toxic marshmallow man Glenn Beck rants and raves at his low IQ viewers and then once he’s gotten them good and mad about what a Communist (possibly Muslim) BAD, BAD, VERY VERY BAD MAN Chief Justice John Roberts really is, he offers to sell them a “COWARD” tee-shit for a mere $30!
The “TRAITOR” design is sure to follow.
Controversy sells, of course, but this is probably the single best use of inciting-rage- in-thick-people-as-a-marketing-tactic as I think I have ever seen! Get an idiot worked up into a lather, then go in for the close.
Motherfucker is slick, Rick!
Damn he’s good!
I’m starting to think that I have underestimated Glenn Beck over the years. It must be really galling for Alex Jones to see Beck bite his act so blatantly and then rake in the millions (Beck made over $80 million in 2011 alone) selling shit like this to pea-brained old farts!
Glenn Beck told the assembled at the Faith & Freedom Coalition conference in Washington today that he’s giving up on the Van Jones hater stuff and fixing his aim at Glee:
“A year ago I was watching the show ‘Glee’ with my wife and we watched it like this,” Beck said making the motion of his jaw dropping. “It’s horrifying some of the things that they’re teaching high schoolers.But it’s brilliantly done. It’s brilliantly done.”
At first, Beck says he was despondent. “I said at the end of it, we lose,” he said. “There’s no way to beat that.”
But it didn’t take long for Beck to snap out of his funk and start devising a way to defeat “Glee.” Beck’s secret weapon: what he jokingly calls “the Oedipus Project” (“because the left will be making out with me,” he explained to BuzzFeed this week). Essentially, the plan is to produce a conservative alternative to “Glee” that is covert enough in its conservatism to not turn people away.
“We’ve spent a year now trying to put together a push-back with artists with music, but not the stereotypical conservative Lee Greenwood music,” he told the crowd at FFC.
Beck told BuzzFeed in a recent interview. ““The conservative movement needs a Dick Clark, and I hope to fill some of that vacuum.”
I can kinda see Glenn Beck as America’s oldest teenager…
Floundering for relevancy from his outpost in media Siberia, former big-time tee-vee celebrity Glenn Beck is baiting Anonymous with a completely stupid new parody video. At least I think this is what passes for “parody” in conservative circles? Maybe not…
As one YouTube comment noted:
“Hey Glen Beck, you are an evil piece of shit. You are fighting to silence the people. You are fighting to suppress knowledge. You are fighting to perpetuate the status quo. The people will not be silenced. We will not be subdued by your propaganda. We will not bow to the corrupt and unapologetic government officials who seek to control us through fear and unconstitutional actions.”